A year since I escaped

by MrFreeze 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    It's been a year since I escaped the clutches of the Watchtower. Yeah, I'm two days early but it's a Thursday and it was a Thursday that I attended my last meeting.

    I'm posting this thread to sort of gather my thoughts of where I am.

    So, are things better? Easy question for many of you. The answer is yes. However, for a while I wasn't sure. Like everyone else who left without fading, it was tough at first. I had to face the unholy (very apt word use) wrath of the elders and my parents as well as my "friends". For two straight months, I was hounded by the elders. I kept my composure and I feel I stood up to them very well. I posed questions that I could tell were really making them think. I was even told "you are too smart for your own good". They said it like I was supposed to be insulted.

    Then I had my mother. She pleaded with me through tears to turn back. She said some things that definitely hurt coming from someone who is supposed to be a nurturing hand in the family. She said things like "It would be better if you were dead." Harsh. Months after, she accused me of doing drugs and god knows what else she thought I was doing. Never done a drug in my life but I do drink a lot (too much). My stepdad didn't have much to say at first. Then he started to confront me about it. I was living at home at the time. This was not a fun time in my life.

    It wasn't too long after that they told me I had to move out. I live with my brother (not in the JW's) and his wife. It's a nice little arrangement we have. That took so much of the stress away I was dealing with. I had panic attacks several times when I was back at home. Talk about scary.

    Eventually things started to improve. I was able to fill the void in my life. I made new friends, rekindled some old friendships, met a lovely girl named Caitie. Sadly she moved out of state. We still talk all the time and she came back in town in October. I had some nice coworkers help me along. They were a good listening ear and tried to be understanding of my situation. They really helped me keep my mind straight.

    I attended my first Apostafest. Thanks again to TotallyADD and his lovely wife for hosting. It was a great time! It was nice to meet some new people who have all been able to share their experiences and really reaffirm in my mind that the choices I've made are the correct choices.

    So I've been living with my brother for the last six months. I just turned 23. I met a nice girl named Ann. We are going on our first date on Saturday. I'm super excited. Now I'm looking to see if I can find new work. The job I have now is wearing me thin. I am thankful to have a job though in this economy. I would like to move away sometime next year. I think it would be a nice adventure.

    As regards my mother, we are on better terms now. She is still upset and it is still awkward when I see her but for the most part she has refrained from using her guilt and snide remarks. We've gone out for lunch a few times. She keeps the JW talk to a minimum. I think she still has hopes that I will return. I feel bad that I disappointed her by leaving but as one poster on here (and Kurt Kobain) said "I would rather be hated for what I am, than loved for what I am not."

    I've written posts thanking all of you lovely people on here before but I can't help but say it again. You guys are the reason why I left the JW's. Those evil apostates. The GB should be scared of apostates. So thanks everyone! I am so thankful I was able to get out. I wish I could buy you all a beer!

  • unshackled
    unshackled

    Good stuff Freeze and congrats on the great escape. Another poster on here once said about leaving "It is learning how to really live life." And agreed...sharing experiences with others on here sure helps a lot.

    And I too wish you could buy us all a beer.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    I was so sorry to not be able to attend TotallyADD's and Reopened Mind's apostafest, as I really wanted to meet you, Mr. Freeze. You're the same age as my stepson, and I can't imagine how difficult it's been for you. Things are so free and easy for him...lots of girlfriends, good job, parents who love him despite some of his mistakes. I still pack his lunch for him, for GAWD's sake! I hope you continue to find happness and success.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    Congrats on the year. Continue to appreciate "the real life" after living in "the lie." Strength to you and yours. I am glad you have your brother to help you thru your transition. Thanks for sharing your anniversary.

  • Broken Promises
    Broken Promises

    Congrats on the one year anniversary.

    Soon it will be 2 years, then 3... then you'll be like me, wondering where all those years went!

    All the best for your date on Saturday

  • outsmartthesystem
    outsmartthesystem

    "It wasn't too long after that they told me I had to move out. "

    This is what is so egregious about the organization. You weren't even DF'd (not that that should matter).....yet something inexlicable clicked in your mom and step dad's minds that led them to ask you to leave. There is nothing in the bible that tells them that. Even if they take the society's teaching that DF'd people are to be treated like the antichrist......the point is you weren't DF'd. Yet they still felt it necessary to ask you to leave. It is amazing how powerful even unspoken mind control can be.

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