Every clear morning driving in my car I catch myself gazing at the sunrise. It's different almost every morning as the clouds change the amount of light that hits the earth's surface. The earth rotates on it's axis, among other traits, creating a brilliant prism effect as the sunlight shoots at me from different angles as the seasons pass by.
Anyone and everyone can appriciate the sun as it rises and falls bellow the horizon each day. The more hot headed or prideful humans will sometimes balk at it's splender, but secretly they want to peel off a piece of it with their finger and taste it's sherbet goodness as much as the next human. The question is why?
It's because light is comforting, to give a simple answer. Sunlight is a very specific kind of light and it's loaded with vitiman D: a cornerstone for a healthy human life. Scientists have setup treatments called light therapy that have been documented to cure human psychological ailments.
Have you ever turned your headlights out in a moonless night while driving? The blackness is more than disconcerting, it's terrifying. The philisophical difference between darkness and light is obvious, so naturally we are going have an affinity to sunrises and sunsets for the sun is the only source of light that actually matters for us.
In light of what I just said read this scripture:
John 3 - 1 Now there was a Pharisee, a man named Nicodemus who was a member of the Jewish ruling council. 2 He came to Jesus at night and said, “Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher who has come from God. For no one could perform the signs you are doing if God were not with him.”
3 Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again.”
4 “How can someone be born when they are old?” Nicodemus asked. “Surely they cannot enter a second time into their mother’s womb to be born!”
5 Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit. 6 Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. 7 You should not be surprised at my saying, ‘You must be born again.’ 8 The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.”
9 “How can this be?” Nicodemus asked.
10 “You are Israel’s teacher,” said Jesus, “and do you not understand these things? 11 Very truly I tell you, we speak of what we know, and we testify to what we have seen, but still you people do not accept our testimony. 12 I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things? 13 No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven—the Son of Man. 14 Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, 15 that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him.”
16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. 19 This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20 Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. 21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light , so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.
If truth is light then what is darkness? Let me use a story to explain that:
My father and I did not ever see eye to eye. He was blue colar I was white, it was as simple as that. But even though my father didn't understand me he still held the role of my instructor in my life and he did just that in his own way and as a cult drone.
It was like walking on eggshells your whole childhood and being raised by a drill sargent. Many rules that made little to no sense and the question, "why?" was considered a swear word. My childhood was a pressure cooker and it was only a matter of time before I exploded. I did explode, many times and I was hammered back into the ground each and every time. My dad has a background of an intensity that would turn white even the most hardened personalities on this forum and beyond, believe me. Therefore I must conclude that he practiced restraint while he physically and mentally abused me, never sexually.
One of the last fights we ever had I was 16 or 17 years old. The relationship was to the point where if I would come out of my room to get a drink of water he would immediately be on my ass about whether or not it was an acceptable time for such things. He overused the "there is a time for this and that" a lot. I didn't have much respect for him, at the time, so I used what I could to stand up to him: words. Words that I knew would get him into a state where anything could happen. I really do forget what I said, but did it set him off.
He sprung up out of his chair, grabbed me by both of my shoulders and tossed me like a ragdoll into the kitchen countertop. It wasn't that bad I thought, why can't he just hit me? It was then that I realized that he was choosing not to hit me. I realized that he didn't want to, which was very confusing. So I got in his face, maybe a few inches from his nose and said something else, I wish I could remember what I said. Into the counters again I went, my mother was screaming for us to stop. I considered her feelings and then deemed them inconsequential. I was actually surprised she was even there, she usually just went into her room and hide under the blankets when these types of things happened.
I sprung up and got within an inch of my fathers face again and spewed more words. I do remember what my dad said at this point, "you are fearless!" he had desperation in his voice. I was winning, but not in the way I would have scripted it. He did punch me on the shoulder once, but it was a glancing type blow that only gave a red mark because, once again, he was pulling his punches. This I did not find weak, but actually sweet. I never did give him the respect he deserved, but neither did he so that makes us even.
This, to me is not a dark story. Darkness is what my dad went through when he was a kid. He could have popped me like a pimple if had wanted to, he was an ex bar fighter with a massive body, and I gave him every reason to use everything he had on me. Yet, he chose to use maybe 1%. My father is a great man and I owe a lot to his tutelage and example. And he loves sunsets and sunrises, he always told me he could watch grass grow if it didn't mean he had to work in this "system of things."
-Sab
