A woman who had lived a sinful life found God just before she died. She then was taken to heaven, and while waiting outside the Pearly Gates she heard the most god awful screams you can imagine.
"Why are all those people screaming?" she asked St.Peter
"Oh", Peter replied, "those are people having holes drilled in their heads and their backs so we can mount their new halos".
"Forget that" said the woman, "you can send me straight to Hell where they can gang rape and sodimize me for eternity!"
"Why would you want to do that?" asked Peter
"Cause I already have holes for those things".