accusation

by teejay 2 Replies latest jw friends

  • teejay
    teejay

    There are two brothers – "Brad" and "Chad" – separated by eight years. They are the only children of their parents who will celebrate their 31st anniversary very soon.

    Brad is twenty-nine, has been married four years, and has two sons of his own – one aged two years and the other sixteen months.

    Chad still lives at home with his parents. Until Brad moved out of state following college, it was a very close-knit family. After struggling for a couple of years and after getting married, last August Brad moved his family back to the city where his parents live. Recently, a living nightmare has come to life.

    In February of this year, Brad's wife (and, by extension, Brad himself) accused Chad of sexually abusing their oldest son. Supposedly, the two-year-old, slow to talk and barely able to say his own name, said that Uncle Chad "had touched his penis."

    How was it settled that Chad had done it? Well, mom had supposedly asked the toddler, "Who did it?"

    After then supposedly rattling off a litany of about eight family members beginning with "Grandpaw," the little one got around to accusing "Uncle Chad," on whom the accusation now rests. As you read this, Chad is but a phone call away from having to deal with the authorities over a very serious, life-altering matter.

    One wonders how the little one could formulate such an accusation to start with, in view of his limited vocabulary and, up till now, scant interest in expressing himself. Equally mysterious is why the mother of the "abused," after informing the grandparents (Brad and Chad's parents) four weeks ago, has taken absolutely no official action to rectify the matter through legal means.

    Then there's Brad. He has called his folks on several occasions since then to talk about everything—cars, jobs, etc—except this most serious matter.

    Other inconsistencies could be mentioned (including what the daughter-in-law sees as a power struggle between her and mom-in-law for the love and affection of both her husband and her sons), but suffice it to say that not all accusations carry the same weight or should be given the same amount of credibility. The false, the frivolous, the unfounded do as much damage as the real perpetrators.

    In the end, it's the innocent who suffer deep injuries – often in hidden ways that linger – and damaging waves ripple outwards to include many others.

  • lauralisa
    lauralisa

    Hey teejay,

    I can't help comparing the circumstances between this situation that you describe and the situation that Amazing shares with us: ( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=22706&site=3 ).

    In one case, the perpetrator has been identified, and the fact that he perpetrated a crime is not disputable. However, he appears to be enjoying all of the benefits of 'freedom' and presumption of innocence until proven guilty that the US legal system allows.

    In the case you describe, one (credibility tbd) mother is able to launch an ICBM. (I have my OWN acronym for those letters but we'll just let that slide for now.)

    If the orientation was around the well-being of the child, things would go so much more simply...

    There are many things a mother CAN do if she suspects that something is hurting her child, whether it is a virus, bad cartoon, evil neighbor-dog or outright hideous abuse. The first thing I would imagine a mother in that situation doing is to seek expert help in identifying whatever it is that is causing her child harm.

    It is chilling to read your post and imagining some person capitalizing -at her own child's expense- on a threat like this, just to wreak havoc. *sigh* I guess I know that such things happen.

    I have been trying to finish this post. I just can't.

    I'll try to follow up, later, tj.

  • dungbeetle
    dungbeetle

    I agree. A family counselor might be of great help here, being the child is so young.

    In 1975 a crack team of publishers was sentenced to death by a judicial commiteee. They promptly escaped from the cult and now live life on the run. If you have a problem ... and if you can find them ... maybe you can contact the A--postate Team"

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