My Family Study

BU2B

As I have posted before I am working to help get my wife out of the JWs so we can leave together. I have been trying to think of ways to open her mind and get her to think critically and use her mind. I dont want to bring lots of facts and reasoning to her attention if her mind is not yet ready for it. My convention is this weekend and I am dreading it like its my execution day. Especially since it is especially mind controlling. I am worried that it will further cement her into the Borg, and close her mind as it has been designed to do. I hope that the convention is so over the top that it signals some red flags for her. This religion is so far from the message of Jesus and the Good News that he said to preach that it is shocking I never saw it. It is likely to me that the Org is an Antichrist because they Put MOTHER, GB, FDS etc as mediator between the R+F and Jehovah, where is Jesus in this? The whole point of Christianity is putting faith in Jesus for salvation, not any organization not even mentioned in the scriptures! Almost no mention of Jesus anymore only obey the Governing body for salvation, that is INSTEAD of christ or ANTI CHRIST. Anyway I am ranting but here is the article we studied-

Do others do your thinking- 8/22/78 p 3,4 I cant seem to copy and paste it on chrome but im amazed the WTS ever published this. Everything they show as being signs of propaganda identically match methods used by the WTS. Hopefully this show her what propaganda is so she can recognize it this weekend. I know I physically and mentally cannot keep up this charade much longer maybe weeks or a few months but I cant take the super slow road. I really want us to both leave together so we can really be true Christians. But I am praying on it and when I do I feel calmer and can relax. I know bombarding her with facts probably wont work, and she has to be ready to learn. I have much of JW Facts printed out and waiting for when the time is right. You guys advice and guidance has greatly helped me too in this journey Thanks!

clarity

Good luck BU2B ... and keep in touch on here. So much to unlearn!

Hard to imagine anyone swallowing the "don't think, don't trust your heart" instructions ..omg lol!

but we all got sucked in

clarity

ruderedhead

BU2B, use the DC to your advantage. Take notes on the nonsense said that you can point out to her on the way home that is wrong. Back up what you are telling her.Listen to her response carefully so you know how to proceed. She may be more open than you think,or you may need more evidence. I realize you can't debate everything, or you will put her on the defensive, but if you have one or two major points for every day, she may think about it. The rest can come out slowly, over the course of the next few weeks. Please continue to be patient so you can get her out. You're talking about a lifetime v.(hopefully) several more months. I wish you well, and hopefully you will both be out soon.

yourmomma

if the convention closes her mind, it might be best to lay off for a while. this convention is absolutly crazy, so you may get your wish that some flags go off.

JWOP

Any influence to "cement" her will wear off over time; it is common for members to be extra zealous when "new" information comes out, and then it wears off after a while.

You are right not to argue or confront her on items of doctrine. The better way is to ask "offhand" questions that will get her thinking about things that don't make sense in their doctrine (though she won't admit that to you in the beginning).

diamondiiz

DC are generally good to rally the troops for a day or two and then all is forgotten. If she's not a psycho dub, DC won't have any lasting effect on her. You may consider really studying with her for wt study and/or have a real family study night. When you see noo lite or misquotes brings these out, get old publications and say something as "Dear did you notice this noo lite, only so and so years ago we were taught this, isn't this wonderful?" Or, "I looked up the society's quote here and for some reason the author wasn't saying or agreeing with what wts' context, I wonder why they quoted him in this article in the first place." Get her to think, reason and talk about subjects.

Or simply point out faults which may shake the family boat and see the reaction from the wife and move foreword accordingly. All the best in getting her out, but you also have to realize many have tried and never got their spouses out, so be prepared for that also.

Aware!

I read here that appealing to women's emotional side works better. If you want something to look out for, pay attention to the talk on Friday, at 2:25 p.m. ("Avoid Testing God in Your Heart"). Ask her why it would be wrong to learn Biblical Hebrew and Greek. Shouldn't it help you understand the Bible better? He said that some were testing the NWT for accuracy. What's wrong with being skeptical? The speaker is going to say that we don't need to do research because others are doing it for us. Why let someone do your thinking?

King Solomon

Everything they show as being signs of propaganda identically match methods used by the WTS.

That's a way to disarm the threat of the information being shown to members elsewhere. Instead of JWs asking, "why didn't the Society tell me this?" they disarm it by presenting in a manner in which THEY can spin it for their own purposes (i.e. to use it as a warning against "bad associations" etc).

It's dastardly, as the Society realizes that some information is best hid in plain sight.

cog_survivor

One of the biggest challenges to my cult mentality was discovering that people outside my group demonstrated more fruits of the spirit than I or anyone else in the cult. I kept asking myself, why if we have God's spirit are we the most joyless people I know. (The standard answer was that satan wasn't attacking them like us but it still did not compute.)

I'm not saying this so that you will guilt yourself into trying harder that just leads to frustration. But what I am saying is focus on your own spirituality. Let it change you as you are ready to change and let her see the change. Your actions will preach louder than anything.

It is one of the hardest things to taste freedom and not want to give it to others as well. But most of the time, they have to come to see it as desirable before they even want to try it.

Like the others on here, I agree. Keep it conversational not confrontational. Talk about ideas and concepts. Help her to make those steps towards thinking for herself. Help her to see the value in your marriage and family life.

King Solomon

She's probably focusing on the functional benefits afforded by staying in: the vast network of "friends" (so-called), the sense of belonging to a group (remember driving by a KH in a different city, and feeling validated and the sense of warmth/comfort gained by thinking you have built-in friends wherever you go, even if you don't ever meet them?), having a greater sense of purpose beyond work/eating (that JWs feel that all Worldlies MUST experience?), etc. Let's not forget the constant threat of shunning by family members for those who DO leave.

I suspect many JWs are hopelessly trapped, but are unable to escape, so take comfort in the company of languishing in an unstated shared misery: hence the joylessness....

Self-actualization is not so easy: if it WERE, groups like the JW would not exist....

Good luck, and realize that you cannot save the World, sometimes not even your own family... That's one of the corrupt misbeliefs installed by JW thinking: the message of "you're engaging in life-saving work!" It's an appeal to the individual's ego that's just as fake as anything else.

My Family Study

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