In reading previous posts, I had to notice how many of the threads deal with people in the organization who have had serious problems and instead of getting help from the elders, they are driven away sometimes into suicide or a life of severe depression. It reminds me of my sister. When I was being reproved for leaving home, I was trying to make the point of why I had to leave the way I did and I related that 2 months earlier my sister had ran away because of a beating my mother had given her, and my sister thought my mother was going to kill her. My mom chopped all of my sisters hair off with sewing shears and beat and kicked her into a corner for making my mothers oatmeal to mushy. My sister ran out of the door and sought shelter with complete strangers from a fast food restaurant across the street for three days. When I told the elders this story, the only question they had was, "Did your sister commit any sins while she was gone for the three days"? Not: "How is she?" or "Why does your mother beat you" or anything helpful, but they tried their best to find something wrong in my sisters behavior. I couldn't believe it. I was told to go back to the househould or risk being disfellowshipped. We'll, I choose the sinful course and stayed gone. I never regret my decision, but my little sister is still in that terrible situation with no help. Yay you hypocritacil elders who drive people to a lifetime of problems or worse suicide. Where are these so called shepards? By the way, my bitterness isn't only about this one incident but many more also. I hope they are bloodguilty for all the times they have hurt people.
Load of crap
by yumbby 6 Replies latest jw friends
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dungbeetle
Don't be too hard on some JW parents. The Watchtower attracts the emotionally and psychologically handicapped, and it's almost impossible for them to ge any kind of help once they are 'in'.
If you've been reading this board for any length of time, then you know that many many JW's don't make it out alive. Congratualtions; you seem to be one of the ones that has.
Welcome to the board. My email is open if you want it.
In 1975 a crack team of publishers was sentenced to death by a judicial commiteee. They promptly escaped from the cult and now live life on the run. If you have a problem ... and if you can find them ... maybe you can contact the A--postate Team"
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Celtic
Dear Yumbby
Welcome to this board, sorry to hear about your story, unfortunately it sounds familiar. Many, Many years ago, I remember as a kid being yanked around the room by my hair and hit with a stick, too common these practices.
I often would ask as a child why I had been born, I really couldn't see the point of why my parents had had me. Here I was learning about paradise and as a kid, had all the love in the world to give away. Yet, I was slapped and belted that many times, in teenage years, I tried running away from home and felt desperately, desperately suicidal. In the end it got so bad, I would smash my head against brickwalls to try and block out the pain I was going through.
Much sympathy with your situation. Encouragement is offered here to help you maybe overcome the bitterness and move on further than ever before, if you want it. My mail too, is always open, feel free to write me whenever you need to, and I'll do my best to reply to you as soon as I possibly can.
Keep your chin up.
Peace and kindest regards
Mark (Celtic)
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drahcir yarrum
As you read the examples above, what would you expect from the adherants of a cult that is infatuated with the words "ROD OF CORRECTION"? Growing up a JW I saw a number of young kids slapped in the face in public, kicked by parents and adults during meetings for making too much noise and otherwise mistreated at home. My parents themselves, while not "SPARING THE ROD" were at least discreet enough to use it in the privacy of our home for more serious offenses other than making a mistake.
I often wondered if the strong influence of the Germans in the WTS resulted in this desire to beat evil out of children.
"Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life son." Dean Vernon Wormer, Faber College
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singsongboi
i think, drahcir yarrum, that the reasons for this are complex. i agree that there is a strong "rod of correction' culture among the witnesses -- but it is not the only factor.
another factor surely is the large percentage of people from lower socio-economic groups who do not have good skills in nurturing children. they tend to let there kids go to far and then use slapping & yelling as a control method.
then, there are some who have personality dis-orders and get out of control. my former wife (as a child & up to 16 y.o) had been beaten by her father with a length of 3" x 2" wood in public, to the point where other brothers were forced to intervene.
in our own family life, she never felt discipline was any good, unless it was violent.
as to "german" influence, maybe it's an anglo-saxon thing. but that's hard for me to judge since i have not lived in any other sort of culture. however, i have noted that in the suburb of sydney where i live, which now has a very large population of australians who have come to aust. from the PR of china, that they seldom seem to have to rebuke their children in public.
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drahcir yarrum
singsongboi:
I certainly agree that there are many reasons for this harshness in the punishment of children in congregations. The socio-economic angle seems valid to me. As a friend of mine once said, whilst we were both still JW's, "the WTS appeals to the world's down and outers".
In the area in which I grew up, there were many of eastern European and Germanic desent who appeared cold, harsh and aloof with their children. Hence my observation about the German influence in Witness attitudes towards punishing der kinder.
"Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life son." Dean Vernon Wormer, Faber College
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SYN
This sort of thing is only too common in the broken psychological scenario which is the BOrganization. Welcome to Dubland!!!
My sympathies - no child should ever be treated like that, but according to the Society, it's really OK to hurt your kids. *PFFF*
Children are precious and irreplaceable, but the BORG wants us to slap them around and sacrifice their lives for the sake of their interpretation of an old book written by people who's very existence is questionable. Lovely.
Glad to see their mind-control didn't take hard enough in your own mind to prevent you from questioning what was going on. Welcome!
The earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing. - The Golden Age