Over 40 yrs baptized, service, builds, talks and talks and talks that I put countless hours of prep into, elder, meetings, assemblies,----you all know. But through it all I never bought the whole truth idea 100%. No matter what it was, meeting, service, assemblies, I just COULDN'T wait for it to END. Always felt bored to death, let me out of here, I got things to do. One thing I'm proud of, I was never guilted into pioneering, just doing the bare minimum field service I could get away with. One month a long long time ago I did pioneer hours unofficially but only because of the pioneer sister I got to work with each day. It wasn't worth it. How many felt that way? How many still in feel that way? Thing is for so many years I believed it was my fault I didn't appreciate the truth like I should and everyone else did, so at times I really tried, but it all just never worked for me, I'm sure if it wasn't for family I would have never been a JW.
Never, never was 100% in
by pontoon 5 Replies latest jw experiences
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punkofnice
I hated elders meetings, meetings, failed circus the whole kit and kaboodle but I thought it was 'the nearest thing'(TM) to the truth(TM).
As an elder when I made the rota I used to put myself on car park duty during the watchtower....and I didn't listen to it on the headphones either. Awful drudgery.
If the truth be known there isn't one person that is 100% but they put up and shut up to save face.
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frankiespeakin
Yeah I used to hate field service but did it as a duty, I managed to suppress any feelings that would come up because I was trying "put on the mind of christ/governing Body"
I was far out of touch with my own feeling that have been coming back to me after I left freeing myself from the constant bombardment of bull shit at the meetings.
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Blackbird Singing
I'm right there with ya, DREADED all aspects of it, Hub tried to make me feel"guilty" saying I just didnt "try" hard enough to embrace it, Ummmm I didnt want to try any harder because it was such a DRAG!!! BBS
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FadeToBlack
On a similar note, I wonder how many got baptized without making the personal dedication first (like me)? Looking back now, I really wonder wtf I was doing/thinking. Why would you sign up for something that like that, if you weren't 100% on-board?
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