Depressed

Gorbatchov

Since the annual meeting 2012 news about the adjusted FDS doctrine, Gorby has followed all the news about it, thought about it every day. Just like the times of the 1995 Generation adjustment. Made some postings on JWD. Talked about it with Gorby's lovely wife.

And then came a depressed feeling, a depressed mood. Some light headache. Bad sleep. Bad mood, like a grunchy old man at 42 years. Flashbacks of my youth and my happy JW parents. Feeling angry about the believe.

I told a friend yesterday, It feels like 5 generations of JW legacy feeling heavy on my shoulders. Relativize all my feelings because of the hypocrisy of our JW believe.

Feeling fear about my own family, wife and children, how do we survive this religion? Without losing all our family.

It feels not good. )):

Gorby

cedars

Gorby - I know that feeling well. You've summarized perfectly my own concerns following a visit to see my family, during which I witnesses multiple generations completely entangled in the cult - including young children just starting school.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/242281/1/It-isnt-my-home-anymore

It's so sad. At least you're not alone in feeling such despair and helplessness. We're right here with you.

Cedars

Gorbatchov

Cedars - thanks for your reply. I read your post about the family visit. It is so clearly recognizable!!

Last week I visit the KH and got the same questions, an old sister asked me "Brother, what is your name, i forgot it."

Then she asked "Is your work the reason of not attending regulary?", "Is your wife not attending anymore?".

I answered all the questions honnest. "My name is xxxxx". "No, my work is not the reason of not attending regulary".

"No, my wife is not attending anymore". I did it with a smile, but when I got into the car with one of my kids, I had to sigh deeply.

These are the difficult issues confronting us.

Thanks for your support. It helps me a lot. I wish you also all the best.

tec

I have no experience in this area. I never had any family in the religion to begin with. I would have been the first, and I would have been the one dragging others in with me, had I not decided to leave first.

I just wanted you to know that I see and hear you, and am sorry for your hurt.

I am glad to know that you have your wife and your children though (if I understood correctly?). You can hold on to one another. I understand the depressed feeling that you describe. I am sure you already do this, but just cherishing those you do have - your wife and children, can help with that. Take one day at a time. Show whatever compassion and love you can to those who are trapped, and who you might lose... sometimes showing compassion helps to ease the sadness that you are feeling; gives meaning to what is happening at least. The only thing you can control is you. You can let them know that you love them, and that you will be there for them.

Peace and strength to you and to your loved ones,

tammy

perfect1

DesirousOfChange

Gorby - I know that feeling well. You've summarized perfectly my own concerns following a visit to see my family, during which I witnesses multiple generations completely entangled in the cult - including young children just starting school.

Cedars - It's so sad. At least you're not alone in feeling such despair and helplessness. We're right here with you.

There are lots more of us here that share your feelings. Well, at least one more (Moi)!

Several times I have posted that I think it would have been easier to take the "blue pill" than to have to face TTATT. I guess it doesn't matter what your age when you discover this, but the older one's age, the more it feels that one has given their "all" to the religion only to find out that the "prize" is an empty bag. As well as the fact that the older you are, the less time you have to "make up" what you have lost -- time; energy; saving for the (real) future; etc.

Damn right it's depressing! And, no one can begin to understand it all, unless they have experienced it too.

Doc

goodsoul

Dear Gorby! I share you feelings. I am from former Soviet union, was searching for Truth all my life, was baptized 12 years ago as JW, 8 years regular pioneer, was sefving in 3 countries, 7 years elder, Service overseer and have to pick up Theocratic ministry school overseer`s responsibilities. All my family active JW,- elders, pioneers and bethelites. A lot of 'friends' across the world. I don't know how will look like my new life without watchtower. But I feel free and confident with my TRUE Christian Freedom.. ..sorry, it's my first post..

scotoma

The Saga

____Keleman

"Everyone is hero. This is a given.

We have a call to adventure.

We refuse.

A crisis ensues.

We cannot turn back-and we answer the call.

We collect helpers, teachers, guides.

And we cross the threshold into the unknown.

We lose our identity and enter an abyss, a nadir, the belly of a whale.

We emerge.

We begin traveling back home to what we have known-

re-crossing the threshold.

We return.

We have changed. "

Stirred

So glad I found this thread. Really helps...

Depressed

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