Your To-Do List Upon Exiting The Cult

by rubadubdub 6 Replies latest jw friends

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  rubadubdub

  Did you have a to-do list upon exiting the cult, and have you accomplished your goals? If you are still "in", have you started your list?

  My List:

  1. Get rid of all cult literature. I didn't want to waste the earth's resources, so I wanted to find a good re-purposing plan. I dediced to donate all my literature to a Cultic Studies Center's Research Library. I only kept the 2010 WT CD ROM for referring to when posting on ex-JW forums.

  2. Celebrate holidays. Gave out candy on Halloween, had a Thanksgiving Turkey Fry with our son, celebrated Christmas in Guatemala with our daughter, went on a sailing trip for July 4th weekend to celebrate my Independence Day from the bOrg (Left July 3, 2011 after last day of DC), Hubby's July 4th birthday and my July 5th birthday-- loved all the fireworks!, etc.

  3. Invited a gay couple to spend the weekend in our home, so I could view them as real people.

  4. Watched scary and "demonistic" movies-- started slowly with Harry Potter, LOL!

  5. Registered and voted in my first election.

  6. Began personally thanking military personnel for their service.

  7. Participated in a 911 memorial service.

  8. Donate blood.

  I am happy to have accomplished all of my goals with the exception of donating blood, as I have not had the opportunity, and I am B12 defficient and think I should wait to correct that anyway. I may just add to my list, if I like any of your ideas!

  PS Sorry you will have to wait another 24 hours for another thread from my hubby. I posted this under his user name in error. Oops!
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  Pickler

  Great list rubadubdub,

  I have been working on a list recently myself. A lot of the ones above I've done, but can I add gambling?

  I don't care for it much,but it's been fun to enter office sweeps & buy lottery tickets. I've also been to casinos. And I've laughed at my horoscope without feeling that I'm letting in demons.
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  Mum

  Since exiting, I have:

  Obtained a Bachelor of Arts degree

  Done several kinds of volunteer work (pulling weeds in the park, operating a booth at ArTown, teaching English to refugees to name a few)

  Moved to Las Vegas (recently; before that, I moved to Reno - loved it!)

  Taken up gambling (A friend taught me a pretty good "system" for video Keno)

  Traveled across the U.S.

  Visited British Columbia, Canada; London, England; and Paris, France

  Participated in the 2003 Silentlambs march in Brooklyn; at the same time, took my daughter to NY for her 30th birthday (She loved it!)

  Become a grandmother and a great grandmother

  Taken up French and Spanish

  Learned machine shorthand theory (I'm practicing speed building so I can make it a retirement career - there's a shortage of court reporters)

  Most importantly, been open to ideas and learned that an open mind is a treasure.

  Welcome to freedom!
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  Pickler

  Thought some more about this list, what I've done so far

  1) completed a degree at uni

  2) traveled to Europe

  3) married & had children

  4) volunteered

  5) practised and studied yoga for years

  6) made some really good friends

  7) thrown some amazing birthday parties

  8) learnt to ski

  I still want to.....

  1) go to America & Canada, particularly the Pacific Northwest & I want to see the northern lights

  2) serous trekking in New Zealand & that long walk in Spain :) can't remember what it's called

  3) my husband wants to fish for blue fin tuna in the Northern Territory, so I'm up for that & I want to go to the Great Barrier Reef this year

  4) I want to continue learning, someone recently posted a thread on Harvardx, so I am looking at that at the moment

  5) my secret long term plan is to possibly qualify as a yoga teacher, by which time ill probably be the oldest one in existence...oh well!

  6) I want to be a grandma one day

  7) I will also one day catch a wave properly without getting dunked!

  Seeing it written down, there's so much to look forward to! Yay freedom!!!!!
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  Xanthippe

  Great thread rubadubdub. The last thread on goals didn't last very long which worried me.

  Love everyone's achievements on here and their goals.

  I had a goal to get a BSc degree when I left and I did that.

  I wanted to visit Florence and the Italian lakes, US and Canada and I've done that.

  Pickler I want to see the Northern Lights too!

  Mum wow you've done so much! A retirement career is such a good idea.

  I still want to go to Egypt, Yellowstone National Park, the Himalayas, Africa, Norway, Petra in Jordan, etc etc.

  

  
• 

  cobaltcupcake

  3. Invited a gay couple to spend the weekend in our home, so I could view them as real people.

  I did better than that - I moved in with a lesbian couple!
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  rubadubdub

  When I wrote my OP, I had my initial personal de-programming strategy list in mind.

  Since a university education is not financially feasible at this late date, I have persued my further education through TED.com, Khanacademy.org, Comedy Central's Jon Stewart (does that qualify? LOL!) and International Living.com. I am studying about retirement oversees, Spanish, photography, teaching ESL and travel writing. I took training to teach as an ESL volunteer and currently am teaching a family man from El Salvador to read and write, so he can get his citizenship. This has been a tremendously rewarding venture. bethelyellow$bag and I also volunteer for an organization that helps handicapped individuals go sailing. I did all the photography for their website and for some other small businesses as well. My hubby just passed his captain's license test and has taken ASA Sailing Instructor courses. We look forward to retirement oversees on a sailboat. We are presently on our way back from a vacation in the FL Keys where I just learned I love kayacking! My little dog and I will be out and about on the high seas! Yay!

  I'm not much into gambling, but by dub deffinition buying raffle tickets for charitry qualifies as gambling, so I guess I gamble. Whatever!

  I would adore becoming a grandmother, but that doesn't seem to be in the cards just yet.

  I practice yoga, meditation and mindfulness. I went on a yoga retreat and attended a mindfulness seminar with the author of The Now Effect.

  Most importantly, I am going through intensive DBT therapy for four months-- this includes a month on each of the following: Inter-personal Relationships, Distress Tolerance, Emotional Self Regulation and Mindfulness. I have learned that the WTB$ takes away all of our "Legitimate Rights." I am learning to establish healthy boundaries.

  Thanks for all of your posts!