if i knew then what i know now....

by jeremiah18:5-10 7 Replies latest jw experiences

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  jeremiah18:5-10

  If you could go back and utilize the knowledge of ttatt that you have now, how would it have impacted your decisions?

  For me, I would've made some different choices. I now see that my depression over losing my position in the congregation and watching what I perceived to be my entire world fall apart around me, left me highly susceptible to influence. Thus I easily took up drinking and smoking. I felt I didn't have anything to live for anymore, so I threw all caution to the wind. I even compromised my wedding vows on multiple occasions.

  Knowing what I do now, I would've embraced the free time I was just gifted. I would've made up for lost time with my wife and kids. I still wouldve made the friends I've made, but would not be as inclined to smoke and drink. Even if I had, I wouldn't have given the congregation authority over me. I so wish that i could've just faded and moved on as my wife did. I wish I had never given the elders the power to drag me to a judicial meeting.

  With that being said, what ifs suck, and life can't be lived that way. I've made great moves since those early days. I moved on from a life of poverty as a janitor and jack of all trades, found a career, and now provide quite well for my family.

  I've made some good, true, loyal, unconditional friends now and have a life with purpose. I just miss my family still in, mainly because they are forcibly removed from me, I'm not so sure I like them all that much, I just prefer to have a choice in the matter.

  Anyway, just curious to hear about others who ponder the whatifs and if they would've done things differently, please share.
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  Phizzy

  The Past is another Country. You have emigrated, you are in a new Country, your JW family decided to stay in the old grey,wet, depressing, no hope Country.

  Your new Country is full of Sunshine and lovely people, and is buzzing with life and endless opportunity.

  To look back to that past Country is like the Concentration Camp survivor who says " I miss the camaraderie we had in the Camp".

  Grab each day of freedom with both hands, and be thankful for what you have, the Paradise that JW's dream of.
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  jeremiah18:5-10

  I hear Ya. Some days are better than others to keep such a focus. Good analogy though.
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  Bobcat

  Jeremiah (or anyone else):

  This is an off topic question -

  In your (Jeremiah's) post above there are green semi-circle icons with an arrow pointing at about the 2 o'clock position. When the mouse goes over them an ad box appears (after the words "depression," "power," and "career"). Am I the only one getting these? Is this some sort of new ad that can be blocked?

  Edited to add: I now notice that when the page first appears, these ads are not inlcuded in the text. But the page immediately refreshes and the ads are imbedded into the text.
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  Bruja-del-Sol

  Bobcat, you've probably installed something on your computer. I've had this once myself, when I downloaded a tool, along with it came some malware thing that showed adds on pages I visited.

  Best thing to do is go to your control panel and look in 'add or remove programs' if you recognize anything you've (probably thoughlessly) installed lately and remove it. In my case it was some 'toolbar' that came along with an app I forgot to uncheck this added 'feature'.

  My husband adds that you should check your browser for advertisement plugins or extensions and then disable them or delete/uninstall them.
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  Bobcat

  Bruja:

  Thank you very much.

  I use Chrome. I checked the extensions and, sure enough, there was an extension called "RoboSaver." When I unchecked it the problem stopped. How it got to be installed I don't have the slightest idea.

  Take Care
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  Darkside Blues

  If I had known before starting college, I would've arranged my finances in such a way to have had a smaller student loan debt load. I also would've chosen a different major that would've allowed me to get work right away and move out of my parent's house. My loans and lack of employment are the chains that still keep me in the Borg. :(
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  Come On Out The Waters Fine

  Good question!

  Some of these may have nothing to do with being a dub but here's a few things I wish I learned or did earlier in life:

  Meditation

  Meditation works much better for axniety and depression than medication and therapy.

  By much better I mean it helps where medication and therapy did nothing.

  A way to make a residual income to support me especially in retirement.

  Investing for retirement.

  Sex

  The best advice I have been given on sex is to only have it with people you have affection for.

  Traveled more

  I regret that I never got to live in a VW bus and travel the US.

  I have my eye on an old VW just in case my wife smartens up and leaves me

  Hated school so I don't think I would have changed anything there.

  I'm sure there's a few more but I can't think of any right now.