I couldn`t resist the "headline", but it is absolutely true, I`m the ex-witness and my everloving was the Bunny. This being Saint Valentines day, it seems a very appropriate moment to share the story:
Back in `72 I was DF`d , Olivetti were in the throws of bankrupting me, I was living in a grotty bed-sit and going through a nightmare divorce.
One day, I got a message from my ex - Lets be friends! Yeah, right. I quickly decided that whatwever game she was playing, no way was she getting any more money out of me, but I would listen to what she had to say.
So, we met up in a Portsmouth pub, and she said that she was now a member of the new Playboy club that had recently opened, and that if I would accompany her as her guest, she would give me a fiver to play with at the gaming tables. Hmm, she was going to give me money? What was I being lured into?
So, we went to the Playboy. Wow, where had these girls been hiding! Back to the plot. As a complete beginner, I hadn`t got a clue what I was doing back then, so when my 25p stake on number 29 black came up, I didn`t collect the chips off the table. The number repeated and suddenly I had got over £300 in front of me. Remember, this in 1973, so its a lot of lolly!
I carried on gaming heavily, lost some, won some on 32 red and stopped playing (Only 1 zero on UK roulette tables, the house only has a 3% advantage I learnt later.)
Feeling full of bon-homie, I gave my ex her £5 back and wandered into the restaurant. Whilst waiting to be seated for our meal, the cocktail waitress came over to take our drinks order. Wow, I was absolutely smitten! This amazing pleasant and beautiful lady was charming, well-mannered and efficient. I couldn`t take my eyes off her.
Of course, my ex broke the spell with a "Hah! She`s well out of your league!" comment, but I was totally enchanted with the lady. I later learned that she was an ex nurse just turned 19, and there was me, an old grizzly of 26.
From there on, I was in the casino every day. My winnings soon went, so I would often stroll in and spend hours just sipping whisky and American dry ginger. I learned to play 7 card stud poker and blackjack, and would often play roulette with just a couple of pounds, so that no-one (I thought) would realise that I was really coming in to talk to the cocktail Bunny.
It was absolutely forbidden to try to date any of the girls, so I played a different strategy. I told my Bunny all about a folk club that I used to enjoy attending, and sure enough, one day, she turned up!
As well as folk music she enjoyed football (joy oh joy), so I invited her to accompany me to see Pompey give Nottingham Forest a 2-0 thrashing. We also became good friends, for me it was the first time that I had actually liked a woman.
Within 6 months we had moved in together, and within another 6 months we were married. We had 3 children - all sons - and have remained the very best of friends. She often accompanies on my jaunts to the pub, and tonight we have booked our places for our 28th Valentines night together.
Sometimes I think that I am the luckiest guy alive!
Englishman.
