Our Watchtower wedding.

by Mazza 8 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mazza
    Mazza

    Thirty years ago today, I walked down the isle of the Kingdom Hall to be given in marriage. Surprsingly we are still married!

    David was 20 yrs old and I was 19. We had been baptised about 6 months earlier and had been dating since I was 14 and David 15. I had family who were jws and I became really interested when I was about 17. I managed to convert David within a year or two.

    Once we were baptised we were pressured by the congregation to get married as they didn't think it appropriate that we should keep dating, year in year out "without marriage in view" - though we had no money nor did either of us have a full time job. I was pioneering and David was finishing a university degree to please his worldy parents. My parents gave us $500 to spend on a wedding, but we preferred to save the money towards the preaching work and so our wedding was a rather dismal affair with nothing of a celebratory tone about it. Every thing was borrowed or recycled - even our shoes. You name it - we did it on the cheap. I tend to think the brides of war time England with their severe rationing managed a more joyous event than our wedding.

    We had an afternoon tea held in a dingy library hall - where our meetings were held in those days. I had given the sisters sixty dollars to spend on tea, coffee and milk and to buy a few cakes. Witness guests were meant to bring a plate, but I guess it was an off pay week and very little food was contributed . I was terribly embarrassed as Davids parents and friends were professional people - engineers and arcitects etc. God only knows what they thought of the occassion. Laughable I imagine.

    The only thing I regret is not having real flowers to carry in my hand. I would have loved to have had one item of decadence to lend some class to the occassion.

    We left the wedding group to go out to dinner - David recalls we ordered a half bottle of wine between us and then we returned to our newly rented apartment - which was a looooooong way short of luxurious. We didn't go on a honeymoon.

    We stayed witnesses for another eight long years after that. When we left, a CO told me that David would be unlikely to stay faithful to me outside the umbrella of the Organisation. I took that as an mean spirited insult and told him I'd take my chances - (coz I didn't think I was that bloody ugly)!

    Anyway I guess there is a moral to the story - the wedding day doesn't count for much. We've had a great life together and we just spend the weekend in Macau where we paid an exhorbant amount of money to stay in a five star hotel with all the trimmings. We don't need that stuff - but it's nice to be able to do it occasionally.

    Anyone else with a wt wedding story?

    Marilyn

  • Backlash
    Backlash

    Hi Marilyn,

    Here's hopin' you have a wonderful 30th wedding anniversary. Was the trip a long overdue honeymoon? Or perhaps, just another one? You've made it for 30 years, despite the absence of the "watchtower umbrella." Congratulations are certainly in order. It must be shocking to the jw's that people can have happy, successful lives apart from their "spiritual paradise." Here's to you both!!!!

    BL

  • Mazza
    Mazza

    Hey Backlash, I'm honoured that your first post is to me. Welcome to the board. Thanx for your very good wishes. I'm going to sound real boring now, but we've had a so many good times in our marriage that going to Macau for the weekend was just a formality. David is working in Hong Kong for a while, so Macau is very convenient.

    I've had some bad luck in my life (10 yrs to the sect and lost my family to it etc) but being married to David was the good hand I was delt and I thankfully didn't blow it!!!!

    Hope to hear more about you in the future.

    Marilyn

  • myself
    myself

    Happy Anniversary Marilyn and David!

  • butalbee
    butalbee

    Congrats to you on your good fortune and happy life w/ a wonderful man who truly loves you.....good men are hard to find.

    No, I don't have a WT wedding to share, thank God.

  • Xander
    Xander

    Well, I *did* have a WT wedding, and the reason/circumstances were very similar to yours. Both hardly working, very little money to spend, family not really supportive (elders certain the marriage would fail, blahblahblah)

    We actually DID spend the $500, though. It's amazing how little we were given in gifts from our witness 'friends'. Hmmm...amazing not really the right word. Insulting? Embarassing?

    We did end up leaving the org last year-ish, and are working on our fifth year together (hardly compares to yours, but hey, you gotta start somewhere).

    Being DINKs without 'the truth' to hold us back, we do enjoy vacations with each other about the continent quite frequently (that's North America). I think we've done pretty well of it - especially considered the failure everyone predicted our marriage would be, and the complete lack of support from ANYONE.

    (That, BTW, is the reason my wife drifted out - 'If this is god's organization, and they claim to represent love, why does no one in the organization ever actually SHOW any genuine love??')

    Xander F
    (Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)

    A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
    --George Santayana

  • Xander
    Xander

    Awww, Butal, you know you really wanted a WT wedding

    Walking down the isle to a kingdom melody describing how 'marriage is god's arrangement' or how the wife should be submissive to her husband!

    ('submissive to her husband' - OMG - how 18-century!)

    Incidently, "by him it was designed" is a google-whack. Not to the lyrics, unfortunately.

    Xander F
    (Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)

    A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
    --George Santayana

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    aw Marilyn .. aren't kingdom hall weddings nice. I wonder if they still allow that heathen ring swapping ceremony?

    You can always 'do a Thirdson' and go have yourselves a proper pagan wedding in a Church or park or registary office or puffing billy or someth'n ;)

    happy anniversary to you and Dazza, unc.

    Me? My memories of Nov 10th 1979: Ridgehaven Assembly Hall, cool sunny day, blooming flowers everywhere, Susan gliding toward me, beauty itself in a flowing white dress, a five minute talk, an exchange of devotion, photos in the gardens and off to a swanky resturaunt with several dozen of our friends .. roast meat, chocolate cake (cut in the time honoured pagan way - us both holding the knife ;) strong coffee and off to the nuptual bed at the latest motel in Town (the Snooty Fox) .. so far so good..

    Next day, a trip to the Adelaide zoo (lucky it was open on Sunday in the city of Churches) watching the monkeys pulling each others private parts and so on after our mutual deflowering the night before had us leave early .. that and running into a polish jw couple who thought finding us at the zoo on our first day of marital bliss very amusing bordering on hillarity. "Do Australians always spend thier honeymoons at the zoo" asked bro. Oceanasik .. "No, just Pioneers and Curcuit Overseers"

    the honeymooners:

    thinking ahead i'd booked a caravan at Second Valley 40 miles south of Adelaide .. the first thing i noticed was that the trees were quite stunted and leaned severely landward of the coast. "does it get windy here?" I asked the park manager as he slipped my cash into his top pocket. "nah, not really" came his unconvincing reply.

    that night we slept together .. about as together as any couple can get - the bed was so concave gravity forced us into the middle and made getting out a major undertaking. "do elephants hire these vans?" was going to be my next question to the trailer park slum lord come slack arse weather observer that is until the storm came and near blew the van over (it transpired to be the biggest storm to hit St Vincents Gulf in 30 years but at the time i just thought it was normal to walk like marcel masour in that wind tunnel of a place. After a fitful night of me constantly climbing out of the sagging marital mattress, going out to check that the caravans wheels were still attached to terror firmer and reasure my young bride that all was well and she'd married a man not easily blown away in a gale, the dawn came clear and calm and we awoke to the delightfull sound of waves clinking along the beach of small shells a few yards away .. so far so good..

    .. after a delightfull cruise around the lushest dairy country in SA thoughts were turning to our caravan and it's bathlike bed just a half hour or so away .. then i realised i'd left the camera (borowed from my sister) on the roof of the car and driven off! Oh dear. We drove and searched till it got dark then it struck me. I had a tent in the car and an esky of food. We'll camp on the roadside overnight and resume our search in the morrow. So we set the small 'two man tent'(men must have been very small were these tents were designed) on thick grass kissed a bit and shut our eyes .. so far so good ..

    what's that big thing between my legs? a wombat! a bloody wombat! "get out!" with that the stupid beast turned sideways and ran into the wall of the tent digging in all fury and panicing as only an enraged wombat can .. i can panic just as good as any native i tell ya and got out of there hurrious incredibelous .. oops what about dear sweet Susan? Well, she was awake by now and, not being so good at panicing, calmly extracted herself from the tangled tent full of crazy wombat. Rubbing her sleepy eyes she points to the big lump running about in the tent and says "what's that?" "that my dear is wombatious horriblous" ...

    fortunately for us it was now 5am, just an hour before sunrise .. unfortunatly it was freezing cold and those early morning hours are much lonnger than normal hours .. come here dear, wally wombats done unspeakable things in our tent, let us retire to warm the backseat of the car .. we breakfasted on cold wheatbix and vegemite washed down with a fruity Wolf Blass red (who packed that picknic basket anyway?) so far so good but the honeymoon just went downhill from here .. :)

    unclebruce

  • LDH
    LDH

    LOL! UB that was a great story.

    It reminded me of a couple that went to my hall "Dave" and "Judy."

    She had three children by a former marriage, it was his first marriage. He planned to support the 5 of them on minimum wage janitorial work ( A bro. in my old cong. owned a big janitorial company). The family car was a broken down 1969 Celica or summat similar.

    They were the sort of engaged couples you find most often at the KH. VERY POOR. Read: The congregation will be paying for the wedding.

    So, after the three showers [8>] hosted for her and the very eventful wedding in which she walked down the aisle talking and waving to everyone (!!!!) we thought that was the end of it....They were off to their honeymoon.

    As usual, everyone kept asking them where they were going for their honeymoon--they claimed it was TOP SECRET, and wouldn't tell for fear of some of his friends "hijinx." 'Nuff said.

    The next morning we were out in Field Service and I happened to look over in the parking lot of a local DIVE hotel. (BTW we were less than 5 miles from the KH.)

    "Um....Guys? Isn't that "Dave" and "Judy's" car?!?!?!?"

    Horrified gasps were followed by:

    EWWWWWWWW......

    The next week at the meeting I said, "So how was the old Rodeo Lodge?" LOL.

    Lisa

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