My JW mom is coming for her 2nd visit this year!

Faithful Witness

My kids are so excited to see Grandma again, after just a month. She canceled her visit scheduled for 2 weeks ago, when she realized it was the weekend of the circuit assembly. (They drive 75 miles, to go to the assembly hall, which is 3 miles from my house... We still wonder if they take the long way, or just hold their breath as they go driving by our property unnoticed).

My husband and I are going out for a rare evening together without the kids. The kids will have fun with her in charge, and they have been fully armed against JW indoctrination. They can't wait to play Mario Kart, make homemade pizza and have a fun time with the real Grandma.

At her last visit, she promised to bring me some magazines. I have not had a chance to do my homework, as I really am focusing more on real life and my own family. We will see how it goes. It won't be the focus of our time together, but I'm sure some JW issues will come up. I do plan to address the situation with my sister again, as I know it really bothers her.

I hope she has a good time away from her usual Saturday drudgery, and we can create some more fun memories. Since I have agreed to accept her magazines, I can remind her that she can count her time here.

Here's hoping for a fun time! She will be sleeping here for the night... first time in over a year. Yay! Maybe I have not completely lost her after all.

Frazzled UBM

Good luck - I hope it goes well. Be careful that by accepting magazines from her you do not create expectations but at least if she thinks you are a possible study it may create opportunities for you to ask questions to get her to think.

KateWild

Good idea to tell her she can count time. If you are part of her ministry she has a reason to associate with you and the kids. Like Fraz says you can accept a study and do some reverse witnessing using just the publications.

The point is she is coming now and you are making fun memories with her. Great news.

Kate xx

ABibleStudent

Enjoy your time with your family and Mom, Faithful Witness. Building happy memories with your Mom is your best option to strengthen your relationship with her.

If the subject of your sister is brought up by your mother, you could ask your mom if she feels that your sister's attitude is being "unduly influenced" by her husband and/or has your sister's husband become more controlling of your sister.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

Faithful Witness

She has gone, and we did have a good time together. We didn't talk JW until yesterday afternoon. I'm always interested to see what she tells me about her KH or things she has heard. A few of the gossip items that she was interested in:

Our congregation seems to be getting smaller and smaller! They moved a couple of our best people to another KH.
There have been at least 3 people disfellowshipped recently. She shared what she knew, along with her confusion about the policy.
They read a "BIG LONG" letter to us, about how not enough people are booking their hotels for the Detroit convention in June. "We don't want to make them look bad!" She claims there will be 45,000 people there.
I have not been out in service in "SO long!"
I have not read the current Awake or Watchtower magazines. (I had copies that were given to me by a friend).
My brother in law is a ministerial servant, and is privy to some information she is not. (She did not know if there were FS hour requirements for this title).
My 11-year old niece was interviewed on stage in front of the congregation. (!!!!) She was asked what her "goals" were. She said she wanted to be baptized, and that she wanted to travel (I read: run away from home). The interviewer chuckled and said, "You mean, Move to Where the Need is Greater. haha." My mom also made the comment, "I think they are going to have trouble with her." (I hope they do. I think my niece could be the catalyst that shakes up this JW movement that has divided our family).

We had a long discussion, and jokingly I asked her if she would count the time. She said, "Oh yes!" We laughed, but I told her it made more sense to count time you are actually talking to someone who is interested, as opposed to the time you spend running around in cars and knocking on doors of people who not at home. She told me how she told the man she reports to, that she had not done any field service in February. He said, "Surely, you've talked to SOMEONE!" Then he coached her on how she can count time talking to coworkers and giving magazines to friends. So she got credit for 3 hours, even though she never had to go out on a single indoctrination cruise with the friends.

Some thoughts I hope she took with her:

Child sexual abuse is not reported to the authorities in the JW religion. She knows this already, and brought up the question, "Do the Catholics report it?" I asked her, "So the JW's are trying to be like the Catholics now?" I asked her if she realized how hard it is to be a child, reporting abuse by an adult. I can only imagine it is a lot harder as a JW.
When did Christ tell his disciples to cast out people who did not agree with Him? She said she was going to look it up. She does not agree with my sister, but will not address the questions I ask about why she is acting this way. (Is it my brother in law, the JW's, or ?? I don't know what I did wrong! Unfair.)
We talked about the disfellowshipping she has seen recently. I tried to suggest that she look at situations from both sides, especially when it is a young person being cast out.
She made the comment that she wished they would allow questions during the WT study. She admitted that she is often confused by the articles. I asked her who she could ask these questions to... Her bible study has ended, since she is baptized. She has questions, but does not seem to feel comfortable asking them.

blondie

Did Jesus cast out Judas.............?

(John 13:26-28) . . .And so, having dipped the morsel, he took and gave it to Judas, the son of Simon Is·car ′ i·ot. 27 And after the morsel then Satan entered into the latter. Jesus, therefore, said to him: “What you are doing get done more quickly.” 28 However, none of those reclining at the table knew for what purpose he said this to him.

Did Jesus DF him? ....No

What had Jesus said earlier about those not accompanying him despite the apostles feelings?

(Mark 9:38-40) . . .John said to him: “Teacher, we saw a certain man expelling demons by the use of your name and we tried to prevent him, because he was not accompanying us.” 39 But Jesus said: “Do not try to prevent him, for there is no one that will do a powerful work on the basis of my name that will quickly be able to revile me; 40 for he that is not against us is for us.

ABibleStudent

Hi Faithful Witness, I'm glad that your Mom and you had a good time together. It seems like you are getting better at asking questions to plant seeds of doubt in your mother.

At the end of her visit did you ask her did she have fun and when she would visit again, because you had a great time with her? Helping her to remember how much fun she had is a great way to plant a seed of doubt that non-JWs are more fun to be with than JWs.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

steve2

That's a helpful update, Faithful Witness.. You have a respectful relationship with your Mom and she with you. Yes, one of the keys is avoiding unpleasantness and focus on enjoyable times. It's good that the talk about the organization was compartmentalized for later. Interesting observations about the upcoming convention and some of the associated problems! Your mother clearly feels safe talking to you so she can be upfront with some of her personal concerns.

JWdaughter

Thanks for the update. Interesting stuff!

My JW mom is coming for her 2nd visit this year!

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