Call from my JW brother that I have not heard from in 5 yrs

by troubled mind 9 Replies latest jw friends

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  troubled mind

  Early this morning I get a phone call from my JW brother I have not heard from in 5 yrs .The first thought in my head was someone has died . So I answer cautiously ......HI IS EVERYTHING OKAY ? He just starts talking as if we had always been in contact. First he apologizes ....well sort of ...for not having contact in so long ( then he adds well it really is both of our faults ....okay) . He says he doesn't want it to be like that anymore ,and I say well great me neither ,I am happy he called , and all the past is water under the bridge . He tells me he is now sober one year ,again I tell him that is great ! I also tell him our older brother would love to hear from him too !

  All of the sudden his cult personality kicks in full force ...."OH you know I can't have a relationship with you guys ,I I just wanted to touch base " " You grew up a witness you KNOW what the Biblke says !"

  I told him we don't care how he chooses to worship ,we just want to be a family . But then he was just going to continue on spouting BS so i said yeah thanks for calling bye ....

  This pissed me off so bad this morning . So no relationship just contact when he feels guilty enough to call .

  Nice that he can quote scripture to back shunning ,but completely block out the simple command to LOVE .
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  blondie

  Are you sure he was sober?
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  rebel8

  So let me guess. Step 9, done in the most minimal way possible so he can check off his list and tell his sponsor he did it.

  All while making the cult happy too. Now he bears NO guilt for his behavior towards you, because he repented.

  Ooh! And he gets to count his time PLUS 1 RV.
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  Oubliette

  But know this, that in the last days critical times hard to deal with will be here. For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, having no natural affection,- 2 Timothy 3:1 - 3
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  Finkelstein

  Sounds like he just wanted to throw or present some guilt onto as your the cause of the family breaking up .

  To brainwashed self righteous people they are in the right, anyone else is the wrong any therefore guilty.
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  Band on the Run

  My not a JW brother will go decades before being in touch with anyone. One day he just turns up. There appears to be no anger. Soon with no notice he will disappear. When we correspond, I get so nervous, bracing myself from disappointment. If he were angry about something, I could better understand. He acts as though such minimal contact is normal. I am the crazy one for believing a three minute once a year phone call would be appropriate.

  He became a Maoist shortly after leaving the WT. Even when he was locked in b/c he lives in the same town the Boston marathon bomber was, he could not say he was all right. I've had the police check on him. I believe this goes back to the Witnesses. Families were not important.

  If you succeeded in getting off the phone with your brother, I admire you. I hope every time that it will end differently. My sister and I were estranged, too. Now we talk. I was stunned that he does the same with her. My nephew is not exempt, either. He used to be promised specific gifts that would warm a little kid's heart and then not even send a card.
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  Crazyguy

  You should of ask him what scripture did jesus say for his followers to shun others that follow him because they feel thier following him better??
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  jwfacts

  Interesting that over the years he could justify not having a relationship with you, because the Bible tells him not to, yet kept on over-drinking.
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  Bungi Bill

  Interesting that over the years he could justify not having a relationship with you, because the Bible tells him not to, yet kept on over-drinking.

  In my experience, an all too common situation amongst the Witnesses:

  - If not shunning a DF/DA relative, then there is will be some other outward show of piety (like "gets his hours in" or similar)

  - meanwhile, his best friend continues to be a character called James Boag!

  Bill
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  troubled mind

  I stopped by and talked to my Dad today ,and his response was ," Well sounds like he fulfilled one of his AA steps ! "