After much hard research performed in the Library at Bethel (this was horrid, let's just say that women who wear pants in Bethel are not very popular & stuff), and many late nights spent looking up obscure Russian words, I have finally figured out just who HildaBlingBling and Mystikool are. They are RUSSIAN SPIES! Since they have started posting here, all they have done is expose our Apostate Really Secret Stuff (codename ARSE) to their ring "masters" in BORGLyn! [ACK]! Here is how I came to this conclusion (written using smallish words for those, uh, "posters" here who unfortunately appear to fall squarely on the left side of the literacy bell curve...)
Mystikool:
Hilda has brought it to our attention that you people in this place can be cruel. Mystics are kool. Kool like dat!
The code-words "kool" and "dat" have been found to mean, respectively, "Warhead Core" and "Remote Detonation System". Furthermore, look at the tense of the sentences - it is obvious that these two spies are working together to defuse our ARSE program. Shudder! We are EXPOSED, BABY! Run for the hills!
Jw do not glorify lack of education. They are some of the mosty educated people on earth.
This is an embedded command telling Hilda to launch another volley of offensive threads, thereby distracting the leaders of the ARSE program so they stop working on our powerful weapons of mass destruction! Note the word "mosty", which is clearly a command that means, in Russian, take those frikking sausages outta the pan before they burn, damnit!
Hilda is must smarter than peopel I know who went to colege and got phd.
Not only are these spies insidous and stealthy, capable of keeping cover under even very adverse conditions, but they are also INCREDIBLY INTELLIGENT! Egads! "peopel" is a Russian word that means "frolicking goat jumping up & down on a bunch of old Oak leaves", so obviously what the evil Spy Hilda is being instructed here is to take our our secret headquarters on the beachfront in California, codenamed "Beth Sarim". I think I need to consult the Spirit, this is so shocking!!!!!
The world has knowledge but hardly any truth. Enlightenment failed. Positivism failed. Reason is the end-all and be-all failed. Skinner failed. Freud failed. Dr Spock failed. And so have the sexperts of this system. Kool like dat
"Sexpert" is Mystikool's Secret Spy Codeword that means "Attack at midnight, and don't forget the goddamn marshmallows this time"! Kool Like Dat, we surmise, is an End-Of-Message token, so that Hilda knows when the message is over. (That, and the fact that that is the end of the post!)
My grandpop had wise proverb. Bring it on!
Oh no! Whenever you hear a spy use the word "grandpop", one must be of the running rapidly hills toward! To use "Engrish", another evil spy language! "Grandpop" is actually Russian for "festival where tons of ice-cold Coca-Cola is forced down the throats of unsuspecting sardines", but the usage here is different! Beware, these spies are SUPER SMART! Oogah!
Nice try. do you think we can reveal our location so that someone here will out us?
Proof!
There is a lot of indoctrination going on here that is preverse.
Not too sure about this one (couldn't find it in that Damn Spy Dictionary Mystikool mailed me), but I think "preverse" is Russian for "small, slightly elongated loaf of bread with funny little black seeds on top".
you are wrong, if you think that.
Damn, but these spies are CLEVER!
But enough of Mystikool. He is only one half of the enormous conspiracy against us. Now we look at some of the mutterings of his female protagonist, (whoops, big word) - HildaBlingBling. No, she is not a hip-hop Queen, indeed, she is not even a Hop Queen. No, HildaBlingBling is a TERRIBLY INTELLIGENT COUNTER-SPY! Eureka!
use subterfuge, be inventive, be creative or subtle, yes. we never lie doh.
Here, HildaBlingBling uses the common spy-word, "DOH". "DOH" can have many meanings, ranging from "you are an absolute, drooling fumblewit" to "Coronation of the 3rd Queen this week", but I am not sure which one applies here.
but the ex-jw are not bove lying.
Whenever a counter-spy says "bove", you know they are about to ATTACK! Fortify, Apostates, fortify!
How u know? u been sying on us?
"Sying" is a very strange word - once again the Damn Spy Dictionary failed to provide a meaning for it. Not even Webster's Thesaurus has it! Fortunately, two nights back, Mystikool emailed me to tell me that "sying" actually means "genuine sympathy felt for victims of explosive diarrhea".
That is greek. see how smart we jw are. facon de parler
Now, here we have a telling statement packed with innocuos, yet deadly, little code-words. "See how smart we JW are", indeed! Francios has since informed me that "Facon de parler" means "my incredibly ability to pick up tons of hot J-Babes at ANY Convention". Strength to this man, I say, for rescuing those J-Babes from their virginity!
Engrish has thrown down the gauntlet by insulting my people about iq. Besides fact that iq bogus, Engrish overlook nother fact.
"Engrish" ( http://www.engrish.com ) is an evil device used by Asian cheap-plastic-toy manufacturing companies to conquer the world. Surely everyone knows this? But worse, HildaBlingBling here informs Mystikool to "overlook nother fact", meaning, in essence, that he must turn off the stove, otherwise the chicken roast will burn! ARGH!
jw grasp utlimately reality to a great degree. they have truth. that thing which others grope after.
Yes, indeed, "they have Truth"! However, though these evil spies have Truth, do they "tR0op|-|"? That, my dear friends, is the "utlimate" question!
Where your ethic? do not blame it on org. the locus of control is interior.
This next instruction from Hilda to Mystik is very seductively worded - you'd almost never see the spy connection if you weren't looking REAL HARD! This one is left as an exercise for the reader! And no, not the type of exercise that involves great big fluffy pink knee-length socks and lots of jumping around to silly 80's music!
you know not what you talk about. jw have done mo than most to secure freedom and rights.
Since "mo" is Russian for "goshdarnittoheck", I suspect HildaBlingBling is telling Mystikool to "attack at midnight", or something!
Now do you care to retract that ill-gotten statement?
Ill-gotten statement? This one is just confusing, and I am still awaiting word from my superiours as to what to do about the translation of this....
We are now alien residents. But our true home belong to heaven. That what Heb 11 say. man kingdom temporary.
"Heaven" is an obscure branch of the KGB, which nobody knows about, not even that obscure branch of the KGB!
One artiel say those who "simply cease involvement in the faith are not shunned"
An "artiel" translates directly to "small, wrinkled turnip left in the fridge for a few months too long" in Russian.
My Engrish is limited.
Translation: Our time here is at an end, and limited, too! Take the living rooms by force if neccessary!
As a mystical Christian, I am just as distressed about child molestation as is Mr Bowen. However I wonder about this man's motives. Why did he choose to handle his row with the Witness organization in this way? Why not DA himself first and then fight against the WTS? Why put himself out in the forefront and make himself the centre of attention?
Just some questions that I have about Bill's "innermost motives" or his "kidneys."
As a side-note, I don't like kidneys at all, and especially not those of Bill Bowen. A rather horrid memory I have of kidneys is when I bought a meat pie from a gas station a few weeks back (bad idea), and upon biting into it (I was damn hungry), I encountered a kidney. A. Whole. Kidney. It nestled in my mouth like a bat, only a rounded bat that is actually an internal organ of some deceased animal. I spat it out, and OH GOD it looked horrid. Anyone else care to share a kidney pie experience?
Mystikool told me i should endure. he said it not right for me to drop out when there is battle to be fought. so i no longer offended. i going to speak my mind in this place.
OH GOD! The attack commences! Hide your Fruity Loops!
ex jws think they are free. but they really suffer from cognitive dissonance and malfunctioning defense mechanisms--reaction formation, shadow, neurotic symptoms.
I've noticed that I suffer from shadows, especially in direct sunlight. The HORROR!
Only if he whsiper it sweetly in my ear.
When I was touring Russia and trying to find out more about these Evil Spies, a peasant informed me that a whsiper is actually "generous dollop of doughy, melted Parmesan cheese"! But I'm damned if I know what that means in this context!
But the mystic has bypassed the knowing-believing dileema.
Not even Mystikool knows what a "dileema" is! Maybe it is closely related to the Basque (small Spanish-esque tribe) word meaning "utlimate failure of all entropy-reversal devices ever made"?
We try to avoid bad associations. you sound like you got all components we try stay away from. but thanks.
One component they should try & stay away from is our EVIL APOSTATE NUCLEAR WEAPON WARHEADZ!!!!!! FOR GREAT JUSTICE!
Anyone who use God's bible for s'wiping purposes will not get my bible. use the internet bible. you can find the goads passage in Acts 26:14 on net.
The final call...
Well, I hope you can all see now what Hilda and Mystikool really are. Yes, they are EVIL SPIES from the Steppes! We need to evade their poison-filled glances, or utlimately, our site will see it's ARSE! OK, you can all run off and do your Watchtower studies for Sunday now, y'hear?
PS Simon, did you manage to sneak that warhead into Mexico yet? Torvaldez is getting, how you say, "jumpy"!
"Vaccination has never saved a human life. It does not prevent smallpox." The Golden Age, Feb 4 1931 p. 293-4 - The Sacredness of Human Blood (Reasons why vaccination is unscriptural)