Local Reaction to Dateline (NJ)

by obiefernandez 9 Replies latest jw friends

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  obiefernandez

  Here are some very interesting comments made to me by an active JW friend in North NJ:

  I just went to the website that you sent in your e-mail about the Pandelos! Wow! Yea, this whole thing is really major -it's been a hot topic in our area, and now across the country. There will be a Dateline 2 hour special with the Pandelos in it and a few other family's across the country and the Bowen from the article. It is supposed to be airing within the next 2 weeks. I keep checking the NBC.com Dateline tv schedule to find the air date. It actually should have aired over a year ago...so some of the interviews may be old...I'm sure they'll give updated information.

  I was actually good friends with Cori Pandelo at the time she told her parents she had been molested by her grandfather her entire life! Some things probably were mishandled by the elders involved at the time...not having experience with handling such major matters...or whatever the reason...but apparently her Grandfather molested like probably like at least 20 people over 40 years. He also abused a few other friends of mine. I was present at one of the grandfather's trials a couple of years ago, to support Cori and some other friends. I heard the grandfather describe in detail some instances of abuse...he is a very sick man and shows no remorse. He admitted to abusing other grandchildren who think he didn't ( some have blocked it out of their memory and their parents are protecting them from what really happened.) . The purpose of this trial was to get money for all of the years of therapy Cori has had to go through to deal with this. They barely won a percentage of what they asked for and the jury actually gave them some of the blame for letting Cori go to her Grandfathers house, when they may have known of him abusing others. He even raped his sister in law, and tried to molest neighbor's kids. He is in the Hawthorne Congregation now , and has been reinstated after being disfellowshipped a couple of times for some of his victims. Anyway, I guess we'll see how the show is presented. Oh-yea the Pandelos are originally from Maywood and their son Justin is our age. He is married now too, to a girl from I think New York. Cori got Married in 2000 and I haven't seen her since the wedding. She lives in Spring Lake Heights-South Jersey.

  I'll let you know if I hear of the air date!

  
  I expressed disbelief that active witnesses were actually talking about it and questioned whether maybe she was inactive like me. Subsequently got this reply...

  Oh, the reason why everyone is talking about it (Pandelo case)amidst the congregation is because when the trial took place at an open court room to the public, it became public knowledge, anyone could have gone to the trial, so anyone could have found out the information, and talking about it in general would no longer be viewed as "slander" or "gossip". Even the victims for the first time were able to talk about it freely to anyone.

  I am active as a Witness. I do believe brothers made mistakes and mishandled the circumstances within this case, however the grandfather had been disfellowshipped and , has faced legal consequences. So, I'm not sure what the issues are why the Pandelos have become inactive, but I am interested in hearing their story on Dateline. Barabara has also appeared on some radio shows this weeks addressing the matter, but I didn't hear any of them.

  The people in the organization are definitely changing and starting to think for themselves a little more! Bravo!

  Obie

  [edited for formatting]
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  silentlambs

  This person does not know the facts of this case and their comments are disparaging to the Pandelo's. They never allowed their daughter back with the grandfather once they found out about the molestation. It was an insurance lawyer's ploy to try and bring fault to the parents. There was none.
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  ARoarer

  This is one of the lies that an one elder, a family member who's own daughter was molested, testified to on the stand, under the coaching of and insurance lawyer defending the wife of the pedophile, who by the way, knew what was going on, and also the pedophiles' defense attorney, who not only coached the elders, but also seated his own son next to the pedophile in the courtroom to stare down the victims testifying and stick his tounque in and out at them in an obscene way. Everything that was said and done against the victims testifying in that courtroom was to intimidate and humiliate. The elders played an active part in this. The court transcripts are proof of the lies and coverup.
  Barbara Pandelo
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  ARoarer

  The person that made the comment that the trial was open to everybody is not accurate in thier comments. The trial went on from November 29th to December 23, 1999. It was a long and extremely painful and traumatic experience to me my daughter and all the victims involved in testifying. First of all the trial was not open to those in congregaitons and the Society's direction. Elders who wanted very much to attend from a congregation that the pedophile once attended, were told not to be involved. None of our closest friends attended for this reason. The only witnesses who attended were the victims and thier families and on or two friends of thiers. Jim Pelllechia also attended but was careful not to be seen with the victims. He stood in the back, most likely thier at the direction of Headquarters, ever though victims were from his own congregaton. The Pedphiles' defense attorney had a field day concocting stories to seed the mind of the jury in an effort to take the suspicion away from the pedophile and his wife and heap it on the victims. The wife of the pedophile actually called each victim a liar. The ones who lied in that courtroom were elders and the pedophile, his supportive wife the defense attorney for the pedophile, the insurance attorney for the pedophile's wife and Headquarters who had people planted there in the courtroom.
  Barbara Pandelo
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  JenGill97

  GRRRRRR!

  Why do they do this? Where is the humanity which should be infinately more profound in an organization which claims to be God's?

  I just don't understand. I just don't understand. :(

  Jen :(

  Free at last,
  Free at last,
  Thank God Almighty,
  I'm Free At Last!
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  Scully

  <edited duplicate post>
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  Scully

  From what I'm reading, I don't understand how on earth this individual - the convicted child molestor - with the history of abusing 20 children could EVER be permitted to hold a position of authority in a CHRISTIAN congregation, or how he could be permitted to go from door-to-door and present himself as a clean, upstanding, moral citizen, or how his reputation ever became more important than the safety of any children with whom he may come in contact.

  The "don't bring reproach on Jehovah" excuse does not apply here. HIS BEHAVIOUR is what caused the reproach in the first place, not the fact that someone was brave enough to expose it. The covering over of the behaviour, the endangerment of children, the threatening of individuals whose interests were in protecting their own children and children in the community only served to MULTIPLY EXPONENTIALLY the reproach on Jehovah.

  The only way the reproach can even begin to be removed is to expose the perpetrators, assist the victims in their healing, forbid the perpetrators from EVER rejoining the community, and spearhead the call for justice to be served.

  If "Jehovah" ever directed these people, he has long since left this wicked, vile organization of hypocrites. It has become like 'whitewashed graves full of dead men's bones.'

  Love, Scully
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  avengers

  Here here Scully, I stand and applaud you.
  Love............Andy
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  cyrano

  I can't believe this guy isn't rotting in prison, instead of being allowed to hang out at the Kingdom Hall.
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  ARoarer

  Obie, I know the girl who is making the comments you've quoted here. She has not bothered with our family since the wedding. Her choice. Her statement the the purpose of the trial was to "get money" is a typical ignorant Jehovah Witness statement. The purpose of the trial was to expose the evil of our daughter's molester, and to publicize his behaviour. Tell your "friend" that if the purpose was to "get money" we would have settled the case years ago. How dare this former friend of Cori make such statements. "They barely won a percentage of what they asked for" is another typical gossip statement that circulates among those who have chosen to abandon our daughter. No amount of money was EVER ASKED FOR. "The Jury gave them some blame because they let her go to the Grandfather's house when they may have known of him abusing others" is a statement that is also circulating among them all. This girl happens to be friends with the family members of the the Pedophile. They lied on the witness stand and tried to convince the jury that we knew our daughter was getting molested by him. The only ones who knew he was a pedophile were the people she now associates with, and hid his perversion. She is close to the elders who lied on the stand regarding thier investigation of the Pedophile and keeping his secret through ecclesiastical privlege. Her comment "I am not sure what the issures are why the Pandelos have become inactive". Is she for real?????? She has had years to sit down with the Pandelo family as a friend and be a true friend, something Jehovah's Witnesses are really incapable of. She could have been a friend and find out what the real issues were following the wedding she attended a year and a half ago. The issue is not that he faced so called legal consequenses, but the issue is that he is a rapist, hiding behind people like her and the pedophile's incestuous family of elders who themselves are married to and fathers of the pedophiles victims, but want to keep his secret from the rest of the congregation, by attacking us for speaking out. Obie, tell your friend who wants to be a "Star" that she is free to come to the side of her friend, our daughter, and be a real friend. She doesn't have to wait for Dateline since she "is so interested to hear our story". The real issue of our being inactive is that the religious community we loved and trusted, perpetuated the Pedophile's lies by giving the implied permission to deny and blame the victims who spoke out. The religious community we so loved and trusted allowed his co-dependant family members who wanted to protect his secret from the congregation buy using their positions of elder authority to threaten us and other victims if we spoke out. The trial allowed us to tell our stories and we depended on our spiritual "sheperheds" to testify truthfully. They refused to do that because Lawyers from the Legal Dept. directed them to withhold information that would have given the jury information showing thier part in knowing of molesting children in the congregation. Tell this girl that since she already has our phone number and address, she is free to call or come and visit anytime, she does not have to wait for Dateline.