I got a call today from JW relative, wondering why i haven't answered correspondance.
No, I haven't called or written some JWs in my life for a while. I have chosen to not respond, or not quickly respond, to their inquiries. Yes, I've even blocked some from my social media and e-mail accounts. No, I am not mad at them. I have come to realize that I cannot reason with them. I have said all that I want to say to them.
You see, I was never baptised, left the religion at 18, went to college, got married, and had a family & profession. I paid some bills along the way, saved some money, bought some nice things, burnt some money, went on vacations, paid other family member's needed expenses (like tuition, dental work, down on their luck). Done all of this without fanfare.
But, the JWs in my life have resented me for what I've done. I've been questioned about new truck purchases, buying a breeded dog, and told that "Skeeter would be nothing without spouse." JW family members REPEATEDLY told us for 5+ year, "Look at Cousin B, he never graduated college and he's a retired millionaire at 40 years old." Ended up, Cousin Bob went to jail. Glad I patiently waited on Jehovah for that one. LOL.
The JWs in my life are afraid of the opposite sex, and have terrible relationship issues. Let marraige & having children pass them by. They have spent & overspent their money, on foolish pleasures. They are hoping the New World gets here before the bill collector. They are picking "their house" out of field service. Yep, no retirement either. They are also waiting on the New World for a spouse and family. They are very unhappy people, and I find that when I make them more unhappy becuase their claws and forked tongues come out when I am near. Digs, little digs, all the time. I dread being around them.
Several months ago, I finally told them that they needed help, professional help. I have then sought to limit my interaction with them. Because, they are toxic.
Today, I got a call from one who thinks I am mad at them. I am not mad. I can't be mad at someone who suffers from either depression, bipolar, obsessive thought disorder, borderline disorder, or getting senile. For the senile one, I've asked him and other JW relatives for his doctor's name. No one gives it to me, so it's up to them to care for him. I can't be mad at someone who has been programmed by the cult to believe that I am "possessed by Satan" (as called into the Elders when he was staying at my house for a visit). It would be like being mad at a baby. I can get aggravated at a baby, but not mad.
Today, I explained that I said everything there is to say, did not appreciate the various cut downs throughout the years, can not help a person who will not seek help themselves, and needed my own space for my own sanity. Plus, if I am not in the picture, then eventually they will not be jealous, and have to look at themselves as a cause of their issues.
Why did I get this call? I figure the JWs are having issues, & fighting amongst themselves. They frequently have pure temper tantrums with each other, especially the two who live together. Last weekend was Thanksgiving, and two JWs showed up at another non-JWs house. The non-JW is like me, college graduates, house, family. This probably set the angst level up a notch. My pure guess.
Finally, I told the JW who called me, just to call me. E-mails end up being a nightmare becuase I can't hear their tone(s). And, he uses it as a platform to send me copious amounts of JW 'cut and pastes'.
No, I'm not mad at my JW relatives. I'd like to meet the real people underneath their cult personalities that are laced with the angst of missed opportunities. I really believe those real people are under it all. But, until they get help and leave the cult, it's like banging your head against a brick wall. Pure aggravation.
(JWN, thanks you for letting me vent)
Skeeter