Can YOU make a difference?!

by termite 35 5 Replies latest jw friends

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  termite 35

  The Conventions in Britain are starting very soon...In just a few weeks expensive cars will sweep on to muddied fields,

  Picnickers will proudly display the latest Tupperware items

  Nylon suited men and modest women will promenade around the functional plastic seating

  The tantalising aroma of freshly cooked burgers and hotdogs with onions and exotic tomatoey sauces will delight the senses,

  The musical treat will enrapture lovers of echoey, upright pianos everywhere,

  But what if this experience of cultured society does not appeal?
  Strange as ir seems,this type of event does not delight all..

  So; how can we help them to get out of it?
  Suggestions for those who do not wish to be there ,but who cannot convinsingly fake their own death please.

  You CAN make a difference-PLEASE- give all you can...
• 

  DanTheMan

  funny post -

  I have a few questions for lurkers or loyalists who visit here:

  Have you made your hotel reservations?

  Have you packed your lunches?

  Have you asked for time off from work so that you can attend all 3 days of the convention?

  If not, don't worry, we will be asking you all these questions again during a service meeting part 2 weeks from now.

  Also, please remember to wear your badge when traveling to and from the convention site. Please tip appropriately. Please dress modestly. Please keep an eye on your children. Please don't horde hotel breakfast items. Please dress modestly. Please don't allow your teenagers to loiter in the hotel lobby until late in the evening. Please dress modestly. Please tip appropriately. Please make sure you are on time for the sessions to share in song and prayer. Please do not loiter in the corridors during the convention session. Please dress modestly. Please don't reserve more seats than the number of persons you are traveling with. Please don't use flash cameras. Please do not let out a "whoop" after being baptized if you are being baptized. Please be on time. Please keep an eye on your children. Please dress modestly. Please bring a notebook and take notes. Please be prepared to be spiritually refreshed and rejuvenated. Please dress modestly.
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  anewlife

  Dan: Oh, the "fond" memories of those service meetings and the same thing being said over and over and over and over....wait a minute...that sounds like chanting, which I believe is a form of brainwashing. Bingo! Wake up people!!!
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  dungbeetle

  speaking of 'dumbing down', we were actually TOLD in our meeting last week, that whil attending the convention to brush our teeth and wear deoderant.

  <sigh>,

  BEFORE YOU TRY AND REMOVE THE STICK FROM MY ARSE, REMOVE THE TELEPHONE POLE FROM YOUR OWN ARSE.

  
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  termite 35

  Dantheman,Hi!I did'nt wear my badge when I got 'out' of the grounds.I used to book into a hotel or holiday home miles away from the ground so I would'nt have to associate with them all when I was fading but did'nt want too many questions asked...I'd also take the carpark plot notice out of the car window so I could go out and about in peace.
  i'd miss friday, arrive on sat morning,show my face and then go off for the day.Sunday would be spent on a day out with the children(they never found conventions taxing!)It's amazing how noone notices if you don't agree to sit or meet up-just keep arrangements general,and you'll have a lovely-stress free holiday with no hassle!
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  larc

  I hope all the Witnesses were taking notes during this period of instruction. After all, it is dificult to remember to brush your teeth, wear deoderant, not steal the motel towels, and not pack your book bag full of donuts from the motel's continental breakfast. Yep, folks need to be reminded of these things on a regular basis, if you took the short bus to school, that is.

  I think they should add some more rules, just to make sure they have everything covered.

  1. Please do not bring a six pack of beer to the convention.

  2. Sex during the sessions is frowned upon.

  3. If you have a heart attack during a talk, please keep it to yourself and only ask for help after the closing prayer.

  4. Sisters, do not wear thongs. Your dress might fly up, caught in an up draft, and you could stumble your brother, and turn him into a pervert, and it would be your fault.

  5. Brothers, do not stare at a sister's breasts. Sisters are the weaker vessel, and you will inflame them and they will become sluts, and it would be your fault.

  6. Parents, do not beat your children in public. Worldly people would get the wrong impression. Take them to the rest room, before you knock the crap out of them.

  7. Anyone who falls asleep will be immediately disfellowshipped.

  8. Breast feeding of babies is not permitted. This turns men into sexual preditors.

  9. Teen age boys who are caught reading the Song of Solomon will be reproved in front of friends and family.

  Have a happy time at our spiritual feast. You will learn nothing new, as you have heard it all before, but pretend that it was a good experience.