Pedophilia, Michael Kelly, and headship.

by LoneWolf 7 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • LoneWolf
    LoneWolf

    Here are a couple of aspects of the pedophile issue that I feel have not been addressed. The first is brought up by Michael Kelly of the Washington Post Writer’s Group. It was published yesterday in our local newspaper, the Eugene (Oregon) Register Guard.

    The full article can be found here:

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A61046-2002Jun4.html

    After mentioning the changes in policy that the church is making and posing some questions about them, he goes on to say this:

    . . . that this is, ultimately and still, a shameful refusal to fully admit the horror of the church's moral implosion. It is -- again -- an attempt at ducking blame and limiting fallout for what is, in the end, a matter of institutional, not individual, corruption.

    The most immediately obvious evasion of responsibility may be found in the directive pertaining to priests who have in the past committed sexual abuse of minors, what might be called the two-rapes-and-you're-out provision -- "if the cleric is a pedophile, or if he has committed more than one act of sexual abuse of a minor." This provision would allow priests who have not been diagnosed as pedophiles to remain in the clerisy. And, of course, this provision would protect from defrocking any cleric determined to have committed one (merely one!) act of sexual abuse of a child.

    "But it was just that one time, your honor," is a defense seldom successfully employed in criminal sexual assault cases. It is not immediately clear to a layman why an institution devoted to the teaching of a higher order of morality should adopt a threshold for the punishment of immorality (not to mention criminality) that would be laughed out of, say, the Suffolk County courthouse. Perhaps it is a mystery of the faith.

    But the real failing is not what is in the proposal but what is not. Not the slightest mention is made of any intention to investigate or punish the high church officials -- bishops, archbishops and assorted superiors and ecclesiastical bureaucrats -- who, it has been redundantly shown, have systematically aided, protected, hidden and promoted known predator-priests. They are the missing guilty, still.

    This pretends, as is the institutional position, that the problem with the church is merely a plague of predator priests. Of course, this is not true. There are about 47,000 Catholic priests in America; the number accused of sexual abuse over the past four decades runs, by the most liberal estimates, only to a few thousand. The church's real problem is that its superior officers deliberately allowed these relatively few priests to remain -- in the face of powerful and mounting evidence of criminal wrongdoing -- in positions where they could exploit their priestly privileges and continue to prey on the young and the vulnerable.

    We are speaking of men such as Boston's Cardinal Bernard F. Law, who stands naked before God for his years of protecting and hiding and promoting priests believed to be guilty of chronic, monstrous crimes of sexual depravity against children entrusted to the church's care. And of men such as Law's former top deputy, John B. McCormack, now bishop of Manchester, N.H., who reportedly admitted, under civil oath Monday, to years of effort in covering up credible allegations of clergy sexual crimes, in order to avoid "a scandal." And many more.

    Certainly, the men who raped boys need to be defrocked, not to mention tried, convicted and jailed. But what about the men who let the men rape boys? Why do they still hold high office? Why indeed do they still wear clerical collars? If two rapes is enough to get a priest defrocked, shouldn't looking the other way from a few decades' worth of rapes be enough to defrock a bishop?

    © 2002 The Washington Post Company

    This entire train of thought applies equally to the Society. We need to know why these principles are not applied right now. Of course, many of us already know, but it’s high time that they be skewered with these questions and driven from any position of respectability.

    And that brings up the other.

    Both the pedophiles and their protectors are in my opinion utter failures not merely as spiritual leaders, but even as men. According to scripture, men are supposed to take the lead and to be the heads of families. In that role, they are to set the tone of the relationship with women, not the other way around.

    For a young man to “try out” a young woman to see whether or not she is “trustworthy” and therefore suitable for courtship is an abandoning of any claim he may wish to profess of any headship. He is unworthy of both that role and of the young woman in question.

    For an elder to be given only a slap on the wrist on the excuse that the woman was dressed “provocatively” again gets the cart before the horse. None of them live up to nor deserve any role of headship, for they have denied it by their conduct. Instead, they have demanded that the woman assume the role.

    I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of this crap.

    LoneWolf

  • larc
    larc

    Lonewolf,

    Some very good points you bring up.

    The last one about a woman's mode of dress always angered me. For a man to use this as an excuse, or for the elders to question a woman on this is simply wrong to the point of being evil. It is always the man's fault when he aggressively commits a crime against a woman.

  • LoneWolf
    LoneWolf

    But to look at it from their viewpoint, perhaps they could justify their conduct by quoting Deuteronomy 25:4. It reads:

    "You must not muzzle a bull while it is threshing."

    What do you think?

    LoneWolf

  • hawkaw
    hawkaw

    I just read the July 1, 2002 QFR on another thread and now I just read this.

    Thanks for the excellent viewpoint.

    hawk

  • wasasister
    wasasister

    Lonewolf:

    According to scripture, men are supposed to take the lead and to be the heads of families. In that role, they are to set the tone of the relationship with women, not the other way around.

    Would you please elaborate on this thought? In what way is it the male role to "set the tone" of a relationship. I'm not going to go all Feminist on you, but shouldn't setting the tone be a mutual process? Perhaps I have misunderstood you.

    Wasasister, no headcovering class

  • LoneWolf
    LoneWolf

    LOL, wasasister.

    Yes, you probably have, and thank you for not "going all Feminist" with me.

    What I am referring to here is that if a man is living up to what he should be, the women around him will not have to be constantly on their guard. This means that he must take the lead in the sense that he keeps himself under control instead of expecting her to exert restraint for both of them.

    The results are beautiful for both too. She now has the opportunity to take the initiative if she so desires, instead of having to constantly be on the defensive. In turn, he gains something that is even more beautiful than her love --- her trust and faith.

    Does that sound better?

    LoneWolf

  • wasasister
    wasasister

    "Does that sounds better?"

    Much, and thank you for the explanation. From your writings, I know you posess what some might find "traditional" values, but you have not struck me as unenlightened.

    Many JW women, myself included, find our sensitivities somewhat hightened as far as equal footing issues. Has that also been your observation?

    Thanks again,
    Wasa

  • LoneWolf
    LoneWolf

    You're welcome.

    Yes. In many if not most instances, justifiably so. Sadly, though, sometimes they take it too far in the sense that they see evil where there isn't any. One gets to feeling that one needs to be a lawyer just to say "Good morning!" to them.

    There are three long term effects of this militant attitude:

    a. Many of the young men who do have the desire to be decent and respectful will tolerate getting kicked in the face only so long, then will actually become what they are accused of being. "I have the name, I may as well have the game." No one appreciates injustice.

    You hear of women asking, "Where have all the good men gone?" Inasmuch as their "goodness" was never recognized, let alone appreciated, many of these good men ceased to be good and became as hostile and self-centered as their accusers.

    b. Many young women will observe the older women's attitudes and either adopt it themselves or lose hope that they will find any man that is worthy of respect and trust. This lack of hope is a contributing factor in the suicide rates. In this manner it also becomes part of their inheritance.

    c. It nearly destroys any chance that either will ever have much chance of having a happy married life. The steriotypes of men, women, and marriage itself have been so skewed that I have a difficult time finding anything at all that is accurate in them.

    Yes, I guess that I do possess many of the "traditional values", although I don't hold them just because they are traditional "s'pose to's". We are now working on our 42nd year of marriage, and there is little that we haven't faced during that time. We did everything "wrong" according to today's conventional wisdom on how to ensure a happy marriage, yet we love one another more now than at first. There is no way under the sun we would have lasted this long if we had used today's "wisdom".

    Really though, I can hardly expect anyone to understand the scope and depth of what I'm trying to say here. If we ever have a chance to meet perhaps I'll get a chance to tell you a little of the love story that has kept me enthralled and inspired all of my adult life, and then you will be able to understand some of what I speak of.

    'Til then, smile and be of good courage.

    LoneWolf

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