Memorable Prayers meetings / assemblies???

by invisible 7 Replies latest jw friends

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  invisible

  Any outstanding prayers that you can remember / recall?

  We had one brother here who was renowned for his very long prayers, sometimes running to as much as 15 minutes in length. Congregational members would have to leave halfway through to catch taxi's etc, he was a dear old soul though, in his younger days before he kicked the bucket, he was a wheelwright, probaly one of the last of his particular craft, repairing horse drawn carriages.

  Another brother at the convention was known for the shortest prayer, he just said thankyou 3 times and that was it.

  Once we had the CO visiting, George Hilton his name was, cheerful old sod from Yorkshire, it was the aux pio and reg pio meeting. I remember squeezing the buttocks of my cheeks tighter and tighter, but still an enormous fart managed to burst forth right in the middle of his prayer, how much I wished for a hole to just swallow me up on that occassion, a ruddy great beaut of a thumper it was, great resonance!!

  Do you have any funny stories to do with prayers?

  Share them here.

  'Celtic' Mark
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  Mister Biggs

  Two people stand out:

  1) A guy named Terrence would ALWAYS say throughout all of his prayers: "And may that we..."

  2) A guy named Bill ALWAYS throws in the word "Father" about 14 to 25 times throughout his prayers. ("Dear heavenly father, Jehover (never Jehovah!), we approach you, father, with humbleness, father. We can't look further, father, for no one is like you, father and nothing can be farther, father, from the truth...")

  Edited by - Mister Biggs on 12 June 2002 14:53:42
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  bay64me

  I remember some bloke from bethel giving a talk at one of the district assemblies who had an awful way of littering his talks with phrases like......"was it not"..."did it not"...... etc. It was difficult not to start counting how often he did this. Anyway, I can't remember his name or the points he made!

  An elderly brother in my old cong who was known to ramble a lot in his prayers once thanked jehovah for the spaceships??????????????

  An elder from the same cong was renowned for asking forgiveness for "our wrongdoings and shortcomings"

  Embarrasing moments when another elderly git who loved his grub would always say thank you for the food and the hands that prepared it, and could never think of anything else to say!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Oh yes and an elder would always pray for jehovahs "blessing on our efforts" about fifteen times in one prayer!
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  terafera

  LOLOLOLOL

  It's posts like these that make my day and crack me up!

  I knew one elder who was pretty hefty and would sit, legs wide open for bookstudy. His crotch was visibly trying to bulge from his 4 sizes too small slacks and it would be so embarrassing for us....during the prayer, he would lean forward, making it bulge even more. Even his shirt was stretching at the buttons..I always wondered if they would make it through the whole meeting.
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  NotBlind

  Clapping on the last talk at a DC, oh yes....

  One year the audience was doing the clap-a-thon thing, practically after every sentence the guy said. Then, the speaker stated something to the effect that "300 JW's have been imprisoned in such-and-such a country". And, like robots on command, the audience applauded that...

  Makes me want to jump up and SCREAM
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  terafera

  LOL!

  Bet they all felt realllll stupid after that!
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  bay64me

  OH NO.............THE SONGS...................I remember a particular elder that would always ask the congregation to sing the closing song in a "rousing manner". His favourite number was always introduced as a beautiful melody, guess what it was?...........LAZARUS!!!!!!!!!!!! "the resurrection joy"!!!!!!!!!
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  terafera

  EVERYONE NOW

  Lazurus lay sleeeeeping... in a cold stone cave......

  How his sisters mourned him...........none there he could save......

  Isnt this so uplifting??