Hi everybody. It's been a few months since I've been here, so I thought I'd stop in and say hello. I also wanted to to tell you a story about my JW mother's behavior at my worldly aunt's funeral. This isn't a post of any educational value, just a post for me to rant, so read on if you would like.
About two weeks ago, I attended a funeral for my aunt Julie who, after suffering with cancer for about two years, lost her battle with the disease and passed away. To give you a little background information, my aunt was the oldest daughter of eight girls and was a well known and respected teacher in the Lancaster City School District. She traveled often and had many friends, most of whom showed up at her funeral to pay their respects.
This funeral wasn't conducted in the typical formal fashion. While everybody was dressed in the usual black garb, this funeral was a bit unusual because each person was encouraged to share their memories of my aunt with the rest of the group. One by one, each of my aunts (starting with the oldest) got up in front of the crowd and tearfully recounted some of the best experiences they shared with Julie also saying how much they love her and will miss her. Some of their stories were humorous, some were serious, but they all shared one thing in common: None of my aunts, even the ones zealous in their faiths, felt the need to be preachy in front of the crowd. I admired the fact that they were focusing on my aunt's life instead of giving their opinions about where she is now.
However, this all changed when my JW mom got up to give her speech. With totally dry eyes, my mom gets up in front of the crowd and proceeds to say something like this....
"I got a chance to talk with Julie about the Bible before she died and we had some very interesting conversations. Some day, Jehovah is going to tell Julie to wake up, and she will discover she is in the New System." Carol (my mom) said some other things after this that I can't recall, but it was along the same lines. While I'm sure she had good intentions, it seemed to me she was trying to take advantage of everyone's grief to recruit some new bible studies. It's almost like she thought that she was some kind of saint bringing peace to the masses.
There was an awkward silence after her rant as everyone kind of looked at one another. To break the tension, one of my aunt's said, "Um, thank you Carol" as kindly as she could before the funeral proceeded. For once, instead of being angry at my mother and the Witnesses, I actually felt a bit ashamed and above all very sorry for them. It's almost as if they can't grieve like normal human beings.
The funeral concluded with everyone standing in a circle, holding hands, and saying the lords prayer. (Of course my mother and sister didn't join since it would be wrong to say the lords prayer with pagans.)
No matter how difficult life can get when you leave the JWs and you're on your own, it helps to remember (or be reminded) what it really truly was like to be one of them. It can only get better.