Did you all ever notice how "sick" the "friends" seemed to always be with weird diseases and ailments and blood disorders? I swear I have never seen so many cases of "chronic fatigue syndrome" and "blood viruses" as I did when I was a Jw. They were constant shoppers at the local homeopathic stores, stocking their shelves with every herb and rub and remedy...and nothing seemed to help these mysterious ailments. My study conductor (once her son stopped sleeping with me and she took over the "study") was also one of the "annointed" and was probably the sickest individual I ever encountered. She was in and out of hospitals with mysterious blood ailments and her cabinets were full of bottles of vitamins and minerals and concoctions...am I crazy or do these people smack of white magic? Every year before the Memorial she would go into hiding for two weeks because of what she called "the heavy responsibility of being one of the annointed". Am I crazy or shouldnt that have been a joyous thing to be chosen? Out came the herbs...it was the same as wearing ashes to show everyone how you sufffffered sooooo for them. I was really put off by the whole act. And she was hardly the only one or the worst offender.
Could it be they are hoping something is physically wrong with them because they cant bear the thought that they are mentally losing it and THATS what is causing their illnesses? I believe that THEY believe they are really sick...anything to have to not go to those meetings ANYTHING or to go door to door again...ANYTHING to break the monotony and hopelessness and endlessness of it all.
When I started to have majorly serious doubts about the "truth" I actually sat down with two elders who had known me for the better part of my JW career and told them flat out all the things that were bothering me. Instead of taking me seriously, they nodded and were sympathetic went and told people I was suffering from post partem depression or bipolar disorder, or my favorite...a lack of B12! I had people calling me with all kinds of herbal remedies including aroma therapy to cure my "spiritual weakness" which they couldnt possibly fathom was REAL. Denial denial, fear, more denial, more depression, more herbs, more problems, more denial.
I feel for my "brothers" still trapped in that life.
[:*(]
Loves
"My task is to bear witness to the truth. For this was I born for this I came into the world, and ALL who are not deaf to truth listen to my voice" - Jesus before Pilate, John 18:37