So the family attended a wedding this weekend that we had coming up for a while. The man getting married (a close relative of my wife) is the son of an (now) elder. He was baptized young. He got married several years ago but the marriage seemed doomed from the beginning. For what I recall, trouble started the same night of the wedding. I remember that the couple was introduced during the reception, followed by introducing her parents and close relatives. Then it was the turn for his parents. They were standing there, waiting to be announced but no one did. Someone told the announcer to move on to the next item. Everyone was left waiting and no one worried about correcting this. Party went on as planned. No apology, no corrections made.
Moving forward to more recent times, I think it is likely that the above event had to do with the fact that she was not a JW and he was baptized. His parents probably tried to break up the relationship, failed and pissed off her parents.
They quickly divorced. Thankfully there were no children in between. We did not find out any more about his JW life. We knew he moved out of the house but that was about it. A couple of years later we find out he was dating a girl. We found out he was visiting with his JW parents. May be it wasn't the most loving of visits, but he was allowed in the house and to mingle with the family. The parents got to know that he was doing ok. His dad was not an elder at this point but he knew the rules.
Then they got to know his new girlfriend. Soon enough they had a baby and the grandparents received them (the grand kids) into their home. His parents live in a very humble (not to say crumbling) house. They had a car accident and could not afford all of the medical bills. She stepped in to help her future parents in law. She was in the medical field so she knew her way around. She manage to get them financial assistance. His sisters were grateful and I am assuming the parents did too.
Finally, the decide to tie the knot. We get an announcement and everyone is exited. At this point, his dad is an elder. I can tell from the time that has gone by that this new appointment really grew into him. Even at family gatherings he spends most of his time sharing "theocratic posts" in facebook. Everything seems ok until a week before the big day. His dad calls our house (we are JWs too, right?) to let us know that he will not be attending his son's wedding and neither will his wife. The reason being is that back then he was Dfed (the kid) and he could loose his elder appointment if he attended the wedding. No one seems shocked by the news. Some of the other JW family members choose not to attend. From that point on my mother in law feels like she has to excuse her attendance. I do think she was sincere when she said she wanted to go just because her other daughters (who live out of town) would be there and she gets a chance to see them. However, she did not need to attend the wedding in order to see them.
At the end, everyone in my house attended the wedding. So did most of his sisters, who are technically JWs but not the type that would get in trouble for doing this. Although I've heard that most of them are baptized and currently make an effort to attend the meeting. So who knows what would happen, but in my opinion nothing will happen. We had to travel and rent a room in order to be there for the weekend. His mom and dad, rather than be exited with anticipation (or busy helping setup the party), went on to field service like any other Saturday. If I had to take a guess, I would say they probably spent the night studying the WT mag as a way to strengthen their "resolute stand to stay loyal to Jehovah"
The point of the story is that I believe that, while no one in the family vocally criticized this move by his parents, everyone knew in their subconscious that this was not right. It was sad that his parents were not there. It was sad to see some of the family wonder where they where at (some were left in the dark as for the reasons) but it was nice to see the outpour of support from the rest of us. I don't think I've ever seen my wife dance so much. The next day everyone went on to social media and started posting pictures and making comments about how great everything was. Even today, 2 days later, some comments are still popping up. Wether we vocalized it or not, I am pretty sure that was the intention in most of those who posted their pictures. It was just another way to say loud and clear "we are with you H & G"
May whatever God you believe in (or not) bless you with a long and happy marriage.