Oh my. Seeing those braindead Watchtower "questions" is like when somebody scrapes their nails against a blackboard, honestly. Thought I'd answer them Thanks to SaintSatan for these questions...originally I wanted to post this here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=32930&site=3, but it got a bit lengthy, so it got turned into a separate post
1-3. What reason for optimism do we have regarding justice? Justice? WHAT? Have YOU been waiting on Jehovah? TISK! Get this Apostate out of here!
4. How have we understood the timing of the parable of the sheep and the goats, but why will we give attention to the parable now? (Proverbs 4:18)
We HAVEN'T understood it - understanding is not a skill promoted by the Tower. Blind faith, yes, but not understanding.
5, 6. Why is it appropriate to view Jehovah as both King and Judge?*DOH* Because it makes the Governing Body ALL POWERFUL and UNNACOUNTABLE!
7. How did Jehovah act as Judge in dealing with Israel?He killed lots of them. Then he killed some more. And after that, he killed some Isrealites. Oh, and did I mention that he nailed a lot of Isrealites? That, and he murdered many Isrealites. I think that just about covers it.
8. What relevant vision did Daniel have?Something similiar to the vision of power that the GB have, methinks.
9. What is one meaning of 'sitting down' on a throne? Give examples.Well, it depends on whether you have one of those toilets with the ass-fountain attached or not. Sitting down on such a throne is no simple exercise - you have to first check whether the ass fountain works or not, because usually a bathroom with an ass fountain is lacking in toilet paper, so if, say, the water supply gets cut off halfway through your download, you will face some problems of a rather smelly nature. Joy to Dog!
10. What was a prime function of Israelite kings? Illustrate.To bonk women in their harems. Do you REALLY want me to illustrate this? You can find many illustrations on the very topmost shelf marked "Adults Only" at any bookstore!
11, 12. (a) What was the import of Jehovah's sitting down, mentioned in Daniel chapter 7? (b) How do other texts bear out that Jehovah sits down to judge?
Why are we discussing the fact that Jehovah sat down? That's so silly! How did I ever BELIEVE in this BS? How on Earth could God even sit down in the first place? Oh, and while we're on the topic, he was a man, wasn't he? Men don't sit down on the throne, they stand up! Unless they have VERY strict wives!
13, 14. (a) What assurance did God's people have that Jesus would become King? (b) When did Jesus sit down on his throne, and in what sense did he rule from 33 C.E. onward?
Well, if his "Invisible Presence" hasn't shown us the fact that he is King yet, I guess nothing will.
15, 16. (a) Why do we say that Jesus did not become King of God's Kingdom in 33 C.E.? (b) When did Jesus commence ruling in God's Kingdom?
Why are we splitting hairs?
17. What key points have we thus far established?
Don't ask me, I'm just here for the hot Sisters!
18. What evidence is there that Jesus would also be Judge?
I didn't know that Jesus was Judge Dredd! Although, now that I think about it, that does explain a lot of things, doesn't it?
19. Why is it correct to speak of Jesus as sitting down as Judge?
Well, I suppose even Judge Dredd has to go to the bathroom sometimes. He's only human.
20, 21. What did Jesus' apostles ask that relates to our time, leading to what question?
This is another one of those "complicated" questions, isn't it? Are you testing the faith of the Brothers again? You KNOW that the Tower discourages "independent thought". Then again, I am running ahead of Jehovah, as fast as I can!
22, 23. What points indicate that the parable of the sheep and the goats did not begin its fulfillment in 1914?
Points? Six love to the Apostates!
24. When will the parable of the sheep and the goats be fulfilled?
I don't know - that interpretation of the Scriptures could change Real Soon Now (TM).
25. What is Matthew 25:31 depicting in speaking of the Son of man sitting down on a glorious throne?
Well, maybe he moved into a mansion with superiour bathroom facilities. Or he might have gotten one of those glorious toilets with a built-in laptop for doing some downloading while you're downloading. Tremendous.
26. What new explanation of the parable comes into view?
What do you mean, "comes into view"? New Light doesn't "come into view", it gets whispered into the ears of the Governing Body while they sleep by angels! *SLAP* Have you been reading those Apostate sites again? You naughty, naughy Publisher!
27. What should we be interested in knowing about Jesus' final parable?
Doesn't matter, really, as long as you don't go and look up anything in those old Watchtowers in the Library!