by zeb 9 Replies latest jw friends
..you had been away from the wt for a time. I saw a quote tonight and it leapt off the page for me.
"Now I know what it feels like to be part of a circle of friends, part of a group. Its a very different feeling than I have had before and it feels wonderful and right'.
Spoken by a lady after being released of her heart "wall" that she had established for protection.
+ comments please if you like.
I wholeheartedly agree with this. JW friends...even family....are brainwashed into only having 'conditional love'.
My non JW friends are all genuine and have always been there for me. Now the JWs all shun me........that tells me a lot about what sort of friends JWs make........they don't.
The following helped me a lot when I left (still struggling with it but I keep trying):
"The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life.
After leaving home and getting hired at my present employer (over 30 years ago), I realized just how negative my parents had become when I'd visit them.
Everything was bad, nothing was good, and there were no answers other than 'Jehovah' (which I find to be a completely useless answer).
I thought about how our lives were diverging, like a fork in the road, a path that splits in 2 with each going off into 2 different directions. It made me sad... like I was suffering their death before they had actually died.
Heaven - Everything was bad, nothing was good, and there were no answers other than 'Jehovah' (which I find to be a completely useless answer).
Oh, brotherrrrrrr! Yes. that's my experience too.
Who is it that says, "let's review - it's a cult?"
It is....and it really messes with the mind too....not in a good way.
..........................
punky said: Who is it that says, "let's review - it's a cult?"
That's Oubliette, punky.
I tried to counter the negativity. I was unsuccessful. This is because I did not live with my parents once I grew up.
To counter negativity, you have to have positiveness, and a lot of it. For every negative thought connection your brain makes, you need at least 12 positive connections to nullify the 1 negative one. This is how strongly a negative experience affects the brain and human psyche. It's part of the survival mechanism and the 'fight or flight' response.
I just finished a course at work entitled "Turning Stress Into Strength". It cited that 1 in 5 Canadians will experience mental illness this year. Prolonged stress is linked to psychological illness. Full-time employees are at risk for burnout. Our 'fight or flight' responses are regularly being activated. Money is a major source of stress but if one is educated about finances and how to manage money, one is usually less stressed about it.
Mental Health Promotion involves action. I thought this was very interesting as one of the key doctrines of Jehovah's Witnesses is really 'do nothing' in their "Pray More + Wait on Jehovah" belief.
In a study group of 127 depressed people who were not seeing any relief from their symptoms by taking anti-depressants, 37 people from this group saw their depression go into remission from exercise alone. Yoga has been shown to have similar effects as some anti-anxiety
medications. Deep breathing triggers release of stress reducing hormones
such as dopamine and serotonin.
A healthy diet is also important. Consumption of processed foods negatively impacts all aspects of health.
There is more but I think most on here know the rest (manage your time, don't set unrealistic expectations, get adequate sleep, focus on finding solutions to your problems, etc).
Heaven.
Good points; all of them. I grew up with this dreadful feeling all of my life. This religion did nothing to make me content or able to enjoy a normal life. Imagine forty seven years of trying and trying to be ..........I don't even know what to call it anymore. I tried to be a JW and live the life set out by their rules. Only in my later years am I able to start disentangling my life, thoughts, feelings and what ever else was sucked out of me by this horrible religion, It's so late in the day for me to come to terms with this delusional religion, It has been incredibly hard to live with being condemned and believing I actually deserved it.
I hope to find some peace and soon. I don't want to obsess about the lies and self righteousness that has made me so angry and sad. I will do it. I know I will.
For now, I need to frequent sites that confirm that this is just another scam of beliefs and that I owe them nothing.
I had stuckvwith this religion over many years, through many personal challenges, without every getting anything back in support, fellowship, approval or just simple human kindness. It was an enormous sense of relief to know I didn't have to do that any more, that I could live my life by my own moral compass, not that of the Watchtower.
Freedom
Joy
Relief
