Watchtower Disrupts Space Time Continuum
As discovered by messenger on this thread,
The Watchtower has disassociated itself from the Watchtower!
the minute they became an NGO member of the United Nations!
So if one who was a Christian chose to join those who are disapproved of God, it would be fitting for the congregation to acknowledge by a brief announcement that he had disassociated himself and is no longer one of Jehovahs Witnesses w81 9/15 23 Disfellowshiping-How to View It
This has caused a disturbance in space and time because it is implausible to become disassociated from oneself, just as it was problematic for Malkovich to become Malkovich.
Therefore, since the day the brief announcement was made that the Watchtower Society is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses, the Society does not actually exist in this dimension.
This has caused confusion for Governing Body members who now exist in an alternate temporal reality where they are not allowed to say hello to themselves. Also, figuring out how not to eat with themselves has been quite troublesome. Some of them have found their consciences allow them to sustain life on liquid protein shakes which is not actually eating, while others choose only to accept food fractions.
The reversal of the Watchtower's existence from itself has caused all of the billions of copies of the Watchtower and other Society publications ever printed to be filled with gibberish and nonsense, which words are contradictory to themselves. This exlains the "New Light" phenomena now present in these publications. In other dimensions other than our own, the effect has been much worse. In one parallel universe all Jehovah's Witnesses are to abstain from blood and anything that rhymes with blood, which presents many new challenges for them, not going out on rainy days (mud), not watching cartoons (Fudd), etc.. you get the picture.
Edited by - professor on 2 August 2002 13:33:47