zanexical connundrum

zanex

I met a lady...as I have mentioned here before I am going thru a divorce and it hasnt been the nicest thing in the world...I met someone who has been very nice to me and patient with me and doesnt expect anythin out of me other than for me to be myself..she is a non-jw..we have been kind of just seein each other randomly. I like her...I am a bit nervous about gettin into ANY type of relatinship just now and she understands that and accepts that. I feel sooo scarred by what happened to me in that horridly destructive marriage that I dont know if I am EVER going to be able to completely trust women in general but this one has been proving herself to be nothing BUT trustworthy and honest. I dunno...I aint sure what to think..I find myself trusting her more and more. There is a bit mroe of course but I dunno how to phrase it....

She showed up one day...

swept me off my feet...

showed me how to feel again

she did so without hurting me

I feel

I trust

I hope

I do not get hurt

She talks to me like a person

looks at me like I mean something

more than the looks and the talks

she MEANS it...

I know not what will happen

I care not to think so far ahead

I go day by day

too much thinking renders my cerebrum dead

I will see what happens I guess

will see where this goes

live through the highs

and cry through the lows...

anyway...thoughts? comments? Bad jokes?

SYN

It's nice to have somebody to love.

For instance, my pet bat, Peanut, is such a lovable schmuckieball! The sun truly shines out of his short, stubbily-tailed little ass! And those little claws are so adorable, and those love nips he gives me sometimes on all my sensitive bits are just sooooooo cute!

Just kidding girl! Glad you found somebody to be your friend! We all need somebody like that...a soulmate...

Xander

and those love nips he gives me sometimes on all my sensitive bits are just sooooooo cute

Does MrMoe know you're seeing other...uhhh...mammals?

Vivamus

Zanex, just go with it, and go for it. Everyone deserves someone to love, and if this lady showed up your doorstep so to speak, don't turn her down. She might turn out to be the one you.

If you deny love, you will hurt yourself more, than anyone else ever can.

Good luck! Viv.

zanex

syn: a soulmate..hmmm that cud be a definite possibility but admitting that to myself is a bit difficult but I'll see what happens...thanx..

vivamus: I am goin for it but taking it one day at a time I dont wanna get burned again...dont think I cud handle another abusive relationship...sigh...thanx fer the advice tho!

SPAZnik

i wuz wondering why zanex wasn't around lately.

zanex, schweetie...you DO mean something.

very nice poem.

have fun...take 'er easy...let it be whatever it is...learn whutcha can along the way....play safe.

SPAZ

joannadandy

I dont know if I am EVER going to be able to completely trust women in general but this one has been proving herself to be nothing BUT trustworthy and honest. I dunno...I aint sure what to think..

I implied from your post that you are still going through the divorce process, am I right? In which case, it's a little to early to say you will might not EVER trust again. Give it time. And give her time. There is no need to rush into anything, nor feel anything for anyone on a prescribed schedule. If only emotions were so easy as "well we have three dates on our belt, I should be feeling like I can call her anytime or I want...oh after three weeks we are going to have the exclusivity talk, and if we don't that must mean she's not into me" Doesn't work that way.

Take your time, ride things out. There is no place to go, and no place to be, so wait for the ride of life to take you where you need to be. As for not being "sure what to think" Do you have to think anything? Sounds like she is cool with putting things on the long slow road and doesn't expect anything from you in the way of commitment. She seems a very understanding person as far as that goes. Stop over thinging! All will work itself out.

zanex

spaz:ahhh whut wud i do without ya? lol...thanx fer the nice words of support...and yah I HAVE sort of been away from the board for a while havent I..lol

joanna:thanx fer the wordz...I know that it will take a while before the damage that my ex did to me will pass...it is just hard right now to focus..ya know? I am sure ya do...and yep I am still going thru the divorce process but I have a feeling that it will not be too too long before this is all cleared up..my ex wants to make me dissapear as fast as I want HER to dissapear...lol..anyway..LTRS!

Francois

I think you should give it some time. Most therapists I know say that at least a year should elapse after a major relationship is over before you start another biggie.

Besides, you never know exactly how any given person is going to react to any given situation until it actually arrives. You can think you know some people very well in a short period of time, only to be completely taken aback when some minor situation - that they don't understand in the first place - arises, and you're dealing with an irrational child all of a sudden, one who doesn't realize what they don't know.

Just exercise care and go slow, avoid the rebound effect, nature hates a vacuum, but you don't need to fill it TODAY, you know.

-francois

Edited by - francois on 14 August 2002 16:46:35

zanexical connundrum

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