Bipolar JWs And Their Care

by Victor_E 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • Victor_E
    Victor_E

    When nobody around you seems to measure up, its time to check your yardstick. Bill Lemley

    SJ is a middle aged JW woman who used to be married to a non-believer. Her physician diagnosed her as being bi-polar. This condition used to be called manic-depressive due to the emotional euphoric highs and depressive lows. In one of her euphoric episodes SJ felt an extreme state of spirituality and acting on it she went to pioneer in Europe. This emotional high cost her lifes savings and her marriage. This crazy episode has convinced her that she needs to follow her physicians orders and take her medication as prescribed. When you listen to her at the meetings you can hear her emotional fatigue still waiting for the new order to cure her and rescue her from this chemical existence. She uses her clich phrases of the new order as a mantra of hope for herself and those she preaches to out in service. She at least has adequate medical care having returned back to work as a teacher.

    In the euphoric spiritual state SJ went into, you could not talk any sense into her and in fact she may have questioned your spiritual maturity to stop her from doing something that in her heart was the right thing to do. One dilemma facing bi-polar people is that their actions are done impulsively oftentimes with little to no regard of the consequences of their actions. So what happens then to those JWs that commit moral infractions? Is their medical condition factored in to treat them mercifully while admonishing them to get professional help? Perhaps we could hear from former elders to this question. What effect does being dfed have on this type of personality especially one that is not taking any kind of medication? These are people at great risk of swinging into a state of hopelessness and hurting themselves more or in some cases even ending their life. If you add the JW beliefs and their myopic meaning to the act of dfing followed by the shunning it only compounds the problem more.

    Her father a JW elder repeatedly physically abused my ex-wife as a child. She along with her four siblings grew up to be very anxious and nervous women. They suffered from somatic problems and my ex-wife was diagnosed as bi-polar. Very early in the marriage the symptoms were manifested by extreme bouts of rage and extreme loving states. The abuse as a child and the religion stunted her emotional growth and this led to her having very little coping mechanisms to function in the real world outside the home and religion. After spending a small fortune on psychiatric and psychological bills she made some progress. The paradox was she could only go so far, her family all JWs discouraged her from continuing with therapy, filling her mind with all the clich phrases they were parroting from the religion about psychological care.

    In my opinion the JW religion only worsens this type of disorder. The religion is extremist in its theology and having a constant diet of black and white extremist beliefs without any critical thinking ability often leads to the person developing very distorted and over generalized thinking that only perpetuates the emotional polarity. This type of disorder should be handled under the care of a physician along with psychotherapy to learn how to minimize the extremist thinking. Even if the person develops enough motivation to get professional help the cost is prohibitive if they have to pay out of their own pocket and insurance often limits the coverage to brief therapy thus leaving the person to deal with life as best they can.

    The whole issue of mental illness among JWs is a complex one and there are so many variables that there are no simple solutions. A person suffering from emotional/ mental problems needs to become proactive and make themselves responsible for their own well being, this requires education and having a strategy for finding the right professional care for themselves. To the Watchtower, people are expendable and as we have seen with the mistreatment of sexual abuse survivors they have no regard for people's well being, their priorities are bent on advancing their financial interests and retaining their power.

  • Swan
    Swan

    Thank you so much for these posts, Victor E. I find them very helpful in understanding myself and what I went through as a JW.

    Tammy

  • Mimilly
    Mimilly

    Victor - I love reading your threads - so informative. I have learned a great deal from my husband, (an RN on locked psych wards for over 10 years) He tells me stories without names and thereby keeping confidentiality. There are so many who are bi-polar. It seems the affliction is increasing, even in children.

    One notable thing is that while a person is in the euphoric or manic stage, they are on fast forward, speak incredibly fast (incomprehensible to the listener) and therefor cannot take a moment to make any decision.

    One of the greatest reasons I loathe the Borg is that they will not allow people who NEED professional help - to get it. Like myself, they deem such people as demonized or spiritually weak.

    This is another attribute of the borg that needs to be brought out on international tv. I feel so badly for those who suffer mental afflictions. Even those that take medication are looked down on, called addicts, told to go herbal, told a bible study would be better.

    ARRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    Mimilly

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    The WTS does not like having bipolar members. That's why they tirelessly work to keep them depressed ALL of the time. They generally succeed, too.

    Farkel

  • Scully
    Scully

    Thank you for these wonderfully informative posts, Victor.

    It's very disturbing to know that the Organization will sap all the energy out of a person in a euphoric manic state and channel it into something for the Organization's own benefit. This poor woman lost her savings and destroyed her marriage, when appropriate treatment would have spared her this self-destructive behaviour.

    The other disturbing thing about this particular situation is that the Organization would no doubt view this as a means whereby the patient "sublimates" their manic state. They will rationalize and say there are so many "worse" behaviours she could have engaged in, including promiscuity, drug use, spending sprees, or other things that are typical of people in a manic or hypomanic state. The fact is that had she not been ill in the first place, she likely could have thought through the decision and realized its potential drawbacks and destructiveness. The illness impaired her decision-making ability, and the Organization's continuing distrust of the psychiatric profession resulted in the escalation of her condition and subsequent acting out in this irresponsible and self-destructive manner.

    Love, Scully

  • puzzled
    puzzled
    The WTS does not like having bipolar members. That's why they tirelessly work to keep them depressed ALL of the time. They generally succeed, too.

    Farkel

    If i'm not mistaken I think they were considered to be "demonized"

    Not sure when the WT lifted that ban.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Hi Victor_E I too enjoy reading your posts and this on in paticular hits home. You asked:

    One dilemma facing bi-polar people is that their actions are done impulsively oftentimes with little to no regard of the consequences of their actions. So what happens then to those JWs that commit moral infractions? Is their medical condition factored in to treat them mercifully while admonishing them to get professional help? Perhaps we could hear from former elders to this question. What effect does being dfed have on this type of personality especially one that is not taking any kind of medication? These are people at great risk of swinging into a state of hopelessness and hurting themselves more or in some cases even ending their life. If you add the JW beliefs and their myopic meaning to the act of dfing followed by the shunning it only compounds the problem more.

    I can only relate what happened in the case of a family member of mine and although her condition is schizophrenia she also has had bouts of manic moods the very high highs and very low lows. During one of these episodes she engaged in very risky behavior and imoral. She at times knew she had done bad things and informed the elders she needed help. She tried to commit suicide several times during the whole time they were having commitee meetings. None of the elders seemed to know how to deal with her, at one point the therapist that was treating her begged, and I mean litterely begged them to let him sit in with her on her commitee meetings so he could inform them just what they were up against and how harmful it would be to disfellowship her in this very delicate condition. He was totally baffeled by the treatment of her by them, not all of them but some, just as you said, I think his exact words were something along the lines of the religions black and white thinking in it's theology without critical thinking abilities and the complete inability of theologians waging judgement over a persons emotional well being when they aren't the least bit educated to do so. He did understand that as far as their spiritual guiadance they maybe could be of some help but when it came to the handling the delicate ramifications of mentaly ill people they didn't have the abilities to do so for the bennifit of the indivudal.

    Long story short, they df'ed her and she spiraled out of control and finally hit bottom. I was the only one of my family members who felt that regardless of the df-ing she needed support from her family especially now at this time. I pressed my other family members to do the same and they had to get "permission" from "headquarters" before they would, shockingly the word came down from the top to help her as long as it's not anything to do with spirituallity. Go figure, what the hell is religion for if not to console the depressed souls. The congergation shunned her, she had no support system, her whole life was a mess and when she finally came to her senses after being hospitalized several times she felt so horrible and had absolutely no one to help her close by because all of us lived in another state. It was hard for her to climb back out of that abyss all alone, I used to worry so much and cry so much for her, I had quit praying, what good anyway....she is still alive and yes was reinstated, still carries much of the guilt for all the wrongs she did while in that manic state. Still has suicidal attemps, they are still messing with her meds trying to get everything right and she always feels rejected by the congergation.

    We know how we felt in the borg, like we could never do enough be good enough, well for her it's much worse. I think it is totally inhumane the way the elders handle the mentally ill and don't even get me started with sociey in general. I do however hold out hope that with so many more having bi-polar problems maybe finally the mentally ill will be treated no differntly than those who have diabedes or someother infliction. Help among the masses, but at what price?

    I honestly think the elders should be educated in all aspects of counciling people not only in spiritual guiadance but also with psychological help as well, but as you so well stated: To the Watchtower, people are expendable and as we have seen with the mistreatment of sexual abuse survivors they have no regard for people's well being, their priorities are bent on advancing their financial interests and retaining their power.

    I'm not sure if this helps you with what you are looking for but it was sure catharic for me. Thank you again for the informative material.

    bc

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    Farkel , what you said was very profound. Of course I laughed at it,,,,,,,it is so funny but true. I have many ups and downs ,as did my mother, and I swear towards the end of my borgdoom, I was pretty much on the downward side of the depression that had no end. It was a black hole and they (JW) wanted me there. Maybe they wanted me there to control me, to suck the spirit out of me, to be cruel, who knows . Maybe if they said well, poor Dede is depressed again, that is why she only gets 10 hrs in service, misses meetings, and doesnt want to work with others in the field ministry. The JW will not tolerate any willfull rebellion , so if you seem to be one of those who causes them grief, they want to have an explanation for your attitude, your lack of will power, you lack of spiritual motivation,,,,,,,,,,, DEPRESSION.. They make you think you are crazy and soon you begin to think you are. I will be the first to be honest and open about my mental problems,,,,,, after all we all have them , especially ex jw's, trying to fit into a world they have never been any part of. But I swear I am so much better since I left the borg,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, not near the deep dark hole......... I get my good ol ups and downs. At least I am not depressed all the time!!!!!!!!!!LOL Sorry , I had to laugh ,, itis the way I cope with how I feel, I have to laugh and be allowed to laugh at myself.

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    Dede,

    If what I said was profound, then you said it better than I did, because you made the point in a very real way. Thank you for sharing that with all of us. No honest dub reading your words can deny their veracity.

    Farkel

  • BeautifulGarbage
    BeautifulGarbage

    LyinEyes,

    My Jw extended family is LOADED with "Bipolar" disorder. One of my poor cousins is particularly bad off. Every time I hear from her, she has started some new medication because the other one "doesn't work anymore." Then, I learn of more of JW my female relative (none of the males seems to be affected, I don't think it's any coincidence) family are taking antidepressants.

    So, there they are, desperately trying to find relief from their malady's, when the root cause, IMO, WTS, "the black whole," and it's powerful vacuum. Of course, this idea never occurs to them, they are suppose to be happy! They go to their doctors, who have absolutely no clue that they are dealing the affects of cult subjection and control, to find the cure for what ails them. I feel so sad for them. All the while, they cling to the "hope" of paradise and it's promise that human "imperfections" (geez! I hate that word) will be wiped away with a mighty stroke of Jehovah's hand.

    It's when I think of this, I feel sorry for them. Also, extremely grateful that I am not one of them.

    Andee

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