What September 11th taught me
I woke to a normal day and thought nothing was going to be any different then the rest of the year. I took a shower, got ready for work and then decided to watch a little television to waste some time before leaving. I turned it on, and there was a man talking about the Oklahoma bombing. I thought, "great, why are they talking about this so early" and then they flashed to a image of a plane hitting the twin towers, then the other, and then the Pentagon. I was sitting there in my seat for what seemed like minutes, but instead was nearly an hour. I was horrified and frightened, wondering what was going to happen next. It seemed like we were the punching bag and nothing was between us and the fist. Of course, I know many people felt the same ... but something about September 11th had to be felt on a personal basis and settled within ourselves.
Prior to this date I always saw life as special, and envisions all those in life as candles burning with the brightness of life. Although I had witnessed many candles blowing out in my life, it always seemed that there was enough people to keep the world bright enough to where their absence was hardly noticed for long. Not forgotten, but others absorbed their missing place. I never thought that candles burning from across the horizon and miles away meant a whole lot. After all, their heat did not touch me and they could only be seen in those brief unrecognizable faces on the street or in the news. People with lives you would never know, and people you would never touch. The ones who were in your Disneyland photos, sitting in the background to your family photos.
Yet when the wind came and blew so many lights out, it seemed like my life was a little darker. The horizon of life seemed a little closer and the wind seemed to be cold with the smoke of candles no longer burning. Suddenly, I felt the need to want to see those lights that I kept close, even closer. To feel their warmth and to smile more at the fact that they were near me. I wanted to smile more to strangers, hold doors open for people I never knew, and to stand with pride that I was nothing like these people who carried out such a horrific deed.
Like many things, time passes and we come to terms with who we were before something happened and who we were after. We find a balance and perhaps find the person that we always knew we could be. What is amazing to me though, is that with all the candles of life that blew out on that single moment in time, the world does not seem darker to me today. No, in many ways the world seem brighter, because more people seem to notice it. I realized all the more so, how life can change at a moments notice and how nothing in this life is permanent ... except one thing! Love, not just for those whom we know and see. No, love for those who we only feel, only see in the distance, love for those who add all of their light and heat to the world.
So how did September 11th affect me? Well it did bring a measure of caution and fear that was not their on September 10, 2001, but it also brought a larger portion of my heart to the front of my life. As I realized that this planet really is a small place, yet we share it with many neighbors. That burn bright all around us, and sometimes we just have to look around at times to see and feel them all the more, with each moment, and each new date that followed September 11, 2001.
My thought
Edited by - kenpodragon on 11 September 2002 17:39:43