"No thanks, have fun"

kenpodragon

One key moment I remember as being a Witness was this time I met this family that was visiting from California. They were friends of some people we knew in the hall, and thus we spent a good amount of time with them the week they were here. They had two polite daughters and the mom was one of those people who could sit and talk to for hours and hours. The husband was really cool, we sat and drank beers and talked about some hunting trips he went on. He was training to be a pilot, which is what the man we knew was, and he wanted to go flying around Southern Oregon. Ever meet someone you only knew for a short time, but you hit it off great with them. This was one of those meetings. We did not talk religion, and we did not talk gossip, it was just three men sitting at the table playing some cards and shooting the breeze.

Well the week went on and our friend decided he wanted to take his visitor up for a flight, and see what the rest of Oregon looked like from the air. If you are not familiar with this area, then you might not realize there are some amazing mountain lakes, waterfalls and other natural wonders to see. I had flown with my friend a couple of times and I know how cool it was to see all these things from the air. They invited me to come, but I had yard work and I had spent a lot of time visiting with them that week already and I wanted to get some things done on the weekend. Plus, since I was a Witnesses at the time ... I felt I better take Saturday morning to do some field service.

It was a beautiful Saturday and as I wasted another one going door to door, I was kind of jealous that I did not take the opportunity to go fly with my friends. It would have been a lot more fun then the preaching. I was the good little Witness though, and thus I did the typical Saturday 2-3 hours to get the required time in. I went to lunch after with my wife and we went home to get some things done. About 5PM we got a call from a person in the congregation telling us that the plane was missing and the guys had not come home yet. Honestly, even at that moment I knew they had crashed ... but some part of me decided they probably flew to Klamath Falls like we did one time before to refuel and prolong the day. It did not take long for the true news to hit, and the local news carried it at eleven. Their plane had technical difficulties and crashed in the forest near Crater Lake National Park, both men died instantly.

Of course the loss of a close friend was hard, but even harder was the fact that one minor decision in my life. Something as simple as, "no thanks, have fun" meant that I was here today and they were not. It might seem minor, as we make so many decision throughout a day, but as I set there at their memorials and watched their wives and children in the sadness and pain. I felt like I was seeing something that would have been my own wife, and my own family ... had I taken the flight, had I just decided to go. It was probably one of the oddest feelings I have ever had.

Few in the congregation or even among the people I knew, realized I had been invited. Only my wife and the wife of our friend knew as they were there when I said no. So there was never some big deal made about, this could have been you or you are so lucky to be alive. The thing is, I knew and that is what affected me. In time though there families moved away, and by the time I left the organization ... we did not even know each other anymore. Perhaps our friendships would have grown stronger had they lived, or perhaps they would have moved on as well. The one thing I know for sure though, is that when I look back at my life and I see these men of my past. I realize that unlike them, I would live to know. I would get the chance they didn't and for that, I am thankful.

Above all of that though, I still wish they never died.

Have you ever had one of those moments, where the difference between your life and your death, were as simple as turning left rather then right?

My thought

Vivamus

I have no similar story to offer. But I wanted to give you some cyberhugs, words seem inadequate.

((((Dragon))))

RandomTask

I have never had one of these moments, but the experience I'm sure gives you so many perspectives on life that one like me can only guess about. Truly sorry for your loss.

Swan

I have had some close calls in the past, but nothing like you have described. I recently lost my niece in an automobile accident at a hazardous intersection. She was only 18. Just out of school. I last saw her when she was 10. The last time we saw each other was under stressful circumstances, as I had just sent in a DA letter to the elders. I will never forget the look on her face as she must have realized that I was out of the JWs.

So many times I wish I could have talked to her. I lost contact with her family and didn't know how to get a hold of her after she turned 18. I searched for her on the Internet, along with my other family. It is my goal to contact them after they come of legal age and give them the information they may want to use to contact me, if and when they are ready.

There was recently a thread on superpowers. I didn't post mine. But it has been something I have thought about lately. If I had the power, I would trade my life for hers.

It sure is hard losing people you care about and feel a connection to. You think a lot about the what ifs and the what would it have been likes and all of the other scenarios if only they had lived or if you had been there. It makes you really appreciate what you've got, because it is something really precious.

Tammy

SYN

Kenpo, Jehover was definitely protecting your ass

Edited to add: Isn't it strange that you're an Apostate in Good Standing now? Heh! Maybe Jehover was protecting your ass for a REASON!

Edited by - SYN on 14 September 2002 7:7:21

link

Kenpodragon that was a very moving post. I have been in similar situations on two occasions myself so I know exactly how you must have felt. It always makes me wonder why Jehovah saw fit to make it so that it was not me that died.

On one occasion I was on military duty involved with a terrorist war somewhere in Africa.(Pre JW involvement) One of the gun crew on one of the patrol vehicles was taken ill and I offered to do the trip for him. My offer was turned down because I had just done a twelve hour stint and someone else was sent. That someone else never came back, he took a bullet through the heart.

The second occasion hit me harder although I was the only person involved. It was also pre JW.

I was driving alone down a very dark lonely and deserted road one night and needed to do a right turn (driving on left). There were no lights coming towards me or behind me as I pulled to the centre of the road and slowed down. At that moment there was a piercing whistle from behind me as though someone wanted to get my attention so I slapped on my brakes and came to a stop. Without exaggeration no more than a second later a giant truck with no lights was exactly where I would have been if I hadnt stopped. I was really shaken up by that, partly because there was no one around who could have done the whistling.

Sounds a bit like a JW "experience" but it made me wonder.

link

kenpodragon

Any positive experience can be turned into sounding like a JW experience with Jehovah involved. On the other hand, it can also make you wonder if the universe is far more wonderful then we imagined. Without all the Gods and judgment we were taught in the churches.

Personally, I felt perhaps I was "lucky" or I just had a little guardian angel or spirit guide looking out for me, perhaps because I had not accomplished yet what I wanted to in life. Interesting, those accomplishments have happened after I left and are still opening up. Of course, I could not see that then ... but looking back I do.

Take Care

Dragon

imanaliento

WOW, what a moving experience you went and are going through.

"No thanks, have fun"

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