Thank you all so much!

by Golden Girl 8 Replies latest jw friends

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  Golden Girl

  I couldn't have made it through these last few days without you all! Thanks for the great links and suggestions in my E Mail!

  Hubby went to have the porta-cath put in for Chemo today and his blood had something elevated that keeps it from clotting. The Dr mumbled something about it being the first to go!..Anyway..they put him on vitamin K and sent us home. My JW Mother in law from HELL..is leaving tomorrow

  His JW sister from HELL comes in Wednesday but someone else is picking her up. Then her and his Mom will be back here Thursday night..

  They are testing his blood again Thursday and if it is OK he will get the operation Friday A.M.

  Hubby keeps thanking me for being "Nice" to his Mom!

  It isn't easy when they huddle in the corner and talk about "Jehovah". I feel so left out! She gets him by himself with her a lot! I havn't even had 5 minutes alone wth him! They are making decisions about his diet without consulting me!..His sister said he should go on a sugar fast.. He was still taking the"Noni juice " that is supposed to "Cure Cacer" but the Dr said ...No more...It might be hurting your blood in some way.So he can resume it after the operation.He does and believes everything they say! His Mom had him reading one of the publications tonight. I have been feeding and shopping and arranging everthing while they huddle and talk.(About me being dissasociated I suppose)

  He talked to his surgeon the other day about being a witness..apparently the Dr. forgot!When he came in the pre-op room today he said he was going to give hubby some frozen plasma and vitamin K. I said "What?"...no he won't let you do that. He said "Why" I said "He is a JW"..the Dr just stormed out of the room. Seems this is a tricky operation. The vein he uses is a major artery under the collarbone. Hard to get to and risky for bleeding.He isn't too happy but said he will still do it. But had to postpone it longer.

  My fear is that if his blood is having problems now...what about when he start chemo? I hear it can cause bleeding. Well I wasn't going to talk medical..I need to post it in the medical section..sorry...

  But I still think it was funny that I had to help them fill our the DPA forms for the hospital. They knew nothing about their beliefs on blood fractions etc. I had to explain it to them!..I still wonder why they are witnesses when the don't even know what their religion believes.Like robots following a leader!

  I tried to sneak in a few puns about all the changes and the "personal decision" rules! I enjoyed that! Made my day! But I dread when they both come up together...I guess I will shrink into the corner again.

  Thanks again for your support and help!

  Golden Girl...aka...Snoozy

  PS..I just took the Mother in Law from HELL home! If I never see her again I will be happy. She asked me if I was feeling bad...I almost laughed thinking ...relief was so near ..and then we left to go home!!

  I will never go to her house again! Nobody deserves to be treated that way!

  Edited by - Golden Girl on 17 September 2002 14:49:38
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  DJ

  Hiya Snoozy,

  I am glad that you are sounding a bit better! It's been a little over a year now since my dad was diagnosed with brain tumors. He, like your hubby was always healthy and strong. It is still shocking to me that he can look so good and be so sick. My dad went thru 6 chemo sessions and he did not have any blood needs. It depends on the specific chemo being administered. Some are more likely to cause the need for blood fractions....and the majority of the time it is the fractions that the org does not permit. There is a drug called Procrit now that can help the amemia associated with chemo. As far as the clotting factor in your husbands blood...boy I hope the vitamin K works..because Platelets are forbidden by the WT. You know these fractions that are allowed and fractions that aren't allowed really make me angry!

  I am not sure if I know what the surgery is for? Is it to insert the porta-cath? Is this chemo systemic or directly to tumors? If it is systemic then I would absolutely question the Doctors about choosing the safest chemo for a jw. It may not be the most effective but it will be the safest for his beliefs. What a mess!

  I was shunned by my entire family.....parents and 4 siblings for a few years but when my Father became ill, I didn't let anyone stop me from being with him. He was happy to see me! The rest of the family was awful to me at first. When I started to weep after talking with my dad..my sister (jw) asked me why I was crying , why was I so weak, where is my God? I took it w/ a grain of salt coming from a dub. I guess that my point is after a year now I have mastered the art of being the only non-jw in a room. It takes some tongue holding and a lot of smiling. Snoozy, just take care of your hubby because you love him and remember that they are misled and you are not.

  Remember when I asked you about stereotactic radiosurgery aka Gamma Knife aka IMRT? One reason was because radiation does not cause any of the need for blood fractions issues. I would really press for answers to the radiation question. Talk with a Radiation Oncologist. There is a Doctor Jeffrey Williams from Johns Hopkins Hospital who used to answer my e-mails to him about my father's treatment. You can even send your hubby's MRI's to him for a free 2nd opinion! My dad's chemo was unsuccessful and the radiosurgery has kept him stable for a year now. I know that this is a lot of stuff for you at a time when you are feeling totally stressed but You have to ask these questions of the doctors. They are all in their own specialty and they sometimes don't communicate. Sort of like the FBI and the CIA before 9/11. I think you should ask one of your children to do the research and talk to the doc's. I did it for my dad because my mom just rank and file listened to every word by the doctors. If I did not intercept my Dad would have had 3x the radiation to his brain and would be rendered demented and would most likely be gone now a result. I learned all of this thru the internet and e-mailing and calling doctor's. His doctor was the HEAD of the Radiation Dept with a PHD and he would have given my dad 3x the radiation required if I was not informed.

  Ask your daughter to learn all that she can about your hubby's illness and you will all be better for it. The whole jw thing just adds 1 more unnecessary problem when we are encountered with life and death. I have you in my thoughts plenty of days and I wish you all the best, darlin. Please e-mail me if you need anything at all! LOVE, DONNA
• 

  Vivamus

  You've shown an amazing strength.

  (((((((SNOOZY))))))))
• 

  ugg

  the road ahead will be long and rough,,,write and vent when ever you need to....my heart is with you

  and your husband....HUGS.
• 

  UnDisfellowshipped

  I thought I would Post this in case anyone needs to know what is supposed to be "ALLOWED" by the Society now:

  I don't know 100% what the Society's Current Blood Policy is (I don't know if even the Governing Body and Elders do anymore).

  However, here is what I have heard is now ALLOWED by the Society:

  Vaccinations (Shots) even if they contain Blood!

  Organ Transplants even though the Organs contain Blood! (Probably a large amount of Blood too!)

  Bone-Marrow Transplants

  Hemophiliac Blood Treatments

  All sorts of Blood Fractions

  Here is a Pharisee-Like List of the "Acceptable Blood Fractions" which Witnesses are now allowed to accept (at least this is what I have heard, not 100% sure):

  *Factor VIII
  *Gamma Globulin
  *Blood Plasma Proteins
  *Albumin
  *Immune Globulins
  *Rh Immune Globulin
  *Hemophiliac Preparations
  *Clotting Factors
  *Synthetic Hormone EPO (Erythropoietin) (contains only "a small amount of Albumin")
  *Autologous Blood (Autotransfusion) (Where your own Blood "flows out through a tube to the Artificial Organ that pumps and filters (or oxygenates) it, and then it returns to the patient's circulatory system")
  *Hemodilution
  *HemoPure (Cow's Blood)
  *PolyHeme

  Also in a 1960's Article the Watchtower Society said that Jehovah's Witness Doctors CAN GIVE Blood Transfusions to those evil "Worldly People!" (However Witnesses are not even allowed to give Blood to their PETS -- Does this seem odd? I guess the Watchtower Society is basically saying that "Worldly People" are so wicked that it doesn't matter if you give them Blood, yet your Pets are better than Worldly People)

  Jehovah's Witnesses are now allowed to accept ALL of the components of Blood, as long as you separate the components and then accept them!

  Is there any logic in this?

  I will try to post Quotes about their Blood Policy soon.

  Also, check out http://www.ajwrb.org for TONS of info on the Society's Blood Policies.
• 

  DJ

  (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SNOOZY and HUBBY)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) You will be in my prayers. I know that you are suffering and I wanted you to know that I care. I know it that doesn't help much right now but it's all I have. The whole blood issue is extremely touchy for me because I had to face it personally when my husband was in an accident.The WT could not be more wrong. Love, dj

  Hi UnDisfellowshipped:

  I just wanted to say Hi and I'm glad you are here. Always thrilled to have another Christian around! I enjoy your posts. I agree, there is NO logic in the wt's blood hypocrisy! There is no love, no mercy, not even any humanity! I have to say that when I was involved with them I was not aware of the 'fraction' thing. I think if I had been aware, I probably would have left much sooner. They don't teach the fraction thing at studies....wonder why? Makes me so mad! For me, the entire issue is summed up in the teachings of Jesus when he rebuked the pharicees because they condemned the disciples for plucking the wheat on the Sabaath. Mercy comes before Sacrifice!!!!! They do not know the Father or the Son or they would see this! Sad......

  I am going to the convention, "Witnesses Now for Jesus" in October. Are you going? It would be great to meet! XJW's now Christians come from all over the world........! I live in PA, about a 2 1/2 hr. drive away. It's the 18-20th. Hope you can come? You can read about it at www.pfo.org

  Snoozy, It would be very healing for you to come too! I hope you can make it! You can stay with me and my husband....and kids, ok?

  Love, DJ
• 

  Prisila

  (((Golden Girl)))

  We're here for you! You're in my thoughts. Don't let them corner you, it's YOUR home. If anything ignore them.
• 

  Golden Girl

  This board has been so helpful! Thank you all aain! I have printed all the info from DJ and Undisfellowshiped. And thank all you others for yor support!. JW's are so stupid! They are so naive they just blindly follow! But boy can they sceam when they want to! Right or wrong!.They don't even care if they have their facts straight! We know more about their religion than they do!

  What do you want to betif I showed these aricles to his Mom and Sister and him..they woudn't even read them. And I don't have the magazines! I wonder if they would research them?

  Yeah sure they would. Then they would be shown up!

  Can you tell I've almost reached my limit?

  Golden Girl...aka Snoozy

  Edited to add update. Well hubby talked to one of the laison committee today. They confirmed most of what was on undisfellowshipped's list . I am making him take a copy to the Bible study tonight and have them look it over...I will cut some of it out so as not to be raising any suspicions.They told him one of them will be withhim Frdayfor te operation to talk to the Dr. He said they have had problems with this hospital trying to force blood!...Ah Gee! I doubt that! Too many won't take blood for other reasons today. They don't want to get sued.

  Thanks again..GG aka Snoozy

  Edited by - Golden Girl on 17 September 2002 20:1:30
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  Golden Girl

  To answer some of your questions:

  He is having the porta-cath put in so they can diectly administer the chemo to his main artery.They said it really tears the little veins up. After reading a bit I found out chemo damages the bloodcells! I can't believe all the things they can take! When he talked to the brothers..they were no help at al! They mentioned nothing about what they could take! Now him and his Mom want to talk to the laison committee and get the name of a dfferent Dr. They think the one he has is no good. He was telling them how difficult it is sometimes to hit the artery. I don't see either one of them making any phone calls..I guess they think I am going to do that!.I guess they want to accept a Dr that will willingly go along with no blood. I hope they don't get one like I had years ago.(Highly recomended by the witnesses) He was going to let me bleed to death until another Dr stepped in! Have any of you seen that Living wil thing the witnesses prodced? It s not very clear and I am sure it is designed so that the witnesses pick the easy aswer and say no to any blood fractions completely. It does give you a chance to say what you will accept! But how any f them really know? So they pick ..None!

  To finish up. Hubby s stage 4. It is in his right upper lung and a lot in his liver. He is jaundiced and I don't know if it is anywhere else. They have not done a full body scan. They found those two and quit. (I guess). They give no hope even with Chemo. They won't even suggest radiation. Maybe it is too spread out?

  We have an appointment tomorrow with the Oncologist.We will also discuss the safest chemo for a JW. I have a lot of questions for him. So I will probably be back on here tomorrow night!!!!

  have a lot more reading to do so I will be backlater. Now that Mother in Law from Hell is gone...

  Golden Girl...Snoozy

  Any other suggestions please feel free to post them! I need all the help I can get!