Hi my name is Joey and have some questions that I really would love the answer to. First off , I am not a JW myself, im 15 and I really like this girl thats a JW. We are currently sophmores and have a couple of classes together and I have grown attracted to her. I asked her out and also asked if she would go to homecoming with me, but she said no. I didnt ask her why cause i knew she had a good reason and she did she's a JW. Her parents wont let her go to homecoming and she told me that in her religion she only goes out with a person if she plans on marrying them.(I dont know if thats true or not but oh well) Being that we are 15 I dont think either of us want to get married, she said no to my request. So what i was wondering is, what can i actually do with her so we can have a relationship outside of school (nothing sexual either). Because I love her to death and I know she likes me and with just meeting during school is not enough to get to know each other better. With the two 45 min class's we have together and the 7min inbetween class's .... thats just not enough time. So any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks
Just a question or two
by JoeyBSM 6 Replies latest social relationships
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concerned mama
Hi Joey,
Welcome to the board. My daughter who is about your age has a JW boyfriend, and to be honest, it leads to a lot of confusion and heartache. This girl is being honest with you. Her life is very different than the average kid's life as her JW religion is more than a religion, it is a whole different culture. Even a very innocent relationship is forbidden to her until she is ready to marry. If she goes against her rules, her parents and the elders of her church can make her life very difficult.
Try instead, to just be a good friend to her. Be a good person so she realized others out in the world are good people, not the bad association as she has been taught. Encourage her to go to college.
E mail me if you need more information.
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concerned mama
Oh, have a look at this thread. The people involved were older than you, but you will get the general drift of the comments.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.aspx?id=36451&site=3&page=1
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Mulan
The only way I would have allowed my daughter to do anything with a boy from school, is if they
- were assigned to work on a school project together, and had to work on it after school
- if he wanted to learn about the religion
- if he wanted a Bible study.
Maybe then, they could have gotten to know each other better. I only recommend #1, to save you!!
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out4good3
When I was about your age I was chasing a girl who just happened to have a JW girlfriend who decided that she liked me. I never caught the girl I was chasing but I did develop a friendship with her JW friend. Well, her elder dad would have nothing to do with me until one day I accompanied them to a kingdum hall for a Sunday service at her request. After that I was like the son he never had, sometimes being allowed to stay over till wayyyy past midnight. Just like that, after attending a few meetings this father basically served his daughter up to me.
I am in no way endorsing this as a way to get next to this girl, as a matter of fact, this may backfire on you. Most likely if you take this approach you'll be introduced to a couple of brothers who'll insist that to see this girl you'll have to
be indoctrinatedstudy with them. You'll soon find yourself making some very unpleasant decisions and wondering if this girl is worth this much trouble.I would suggest you look for another girl whose capable of reciprocating some of that affection you hold for this JW girl. Any relationship, however innocent, will be frowned upon by this girls JW social circle and will make life very unpleasant for you both. Don't be fooled into thinking that if you attend a few meetings that you may find some common ground to have any type of relationship with this girl.
Just like Mulan said
the only way I would have allowed my daughter to do anything with a boy from school, is if they
1.were assigned to work on a school project together, and had to work on it after school
2. if he wanted to learn about the religion
3. if he wanted a bible study.....
They are willing to use any means necessary to bring you into their cult...even to the point of using their own flesh and blood as bait.
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COMF
"Live and learn" time. Take notes, you'll be telling the story of this exerience someday.
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JoeyBSM
O.K. well thx everyone for your suggestions, I asked her to the movies this weekend but dont know if its sat. or sun.(religious issues) and I'm really happy, but she has to have an adult, which im fine with its just an annoyance. Well Thx again.