It was a dark night, I could not hear anything out side. Which was weird as I normally hear at least a cricket or two. My wife was sleeping next to me, no doubt having a dream she would never tell me about later. I got out of bed and walked to the other room, doing the blind man's walk of using my arms to find walls and light switches. I closed the bed room door, and flipped on the light switch. The house lit up and it seemed like a mid afternoon illumination and nothing like 3 AM in the morning. I set down on the couch, when suddenly I heard something move in the other room. It was definitely foot steps and the sound of someone running. I set there freaked for a minute, getting my senses adjusted to what was happening. I stood up and looked for something to grab, who ever this was, was going to get a face full of my wife's new green plant. As that was the only thing within reaching distance. I slowly stepped forward and made comments out loud, "your dead who ever you are" and "I am going to beat the crap out of you" as I inched ever more forward. I could swear I could now hear the breathing of my would be opponent. He was no doubt waiting to confront me with more harm then this plant would inflict on him. I stepped closer, now ready to turn the corner and meet the man head on and perhaps my fate at this pivotal moment in life. I turned the corner, and all I could see was darkness. I almost thought I caught the glimpse of the white in the man's eye's in the corner. I felt his stair as his evil looked right through me. I was meeting a match of anger and hate that ran chills down my spine. I was angry, scared and ready to turn the light on and make my stand. I expected to see the animal of man standing before me at that moment. Ready to fight, and figured this was it and now was the time. Seconds felt like minutes and my heart beat with the pace of a hundred horses as I held that plant tight and aimed for the light switch. "Click" The room illuminated and there it was staring at me from across the room. The enemy of my night, the accumulation of my anticipation. Looking at me, seeing me ready to take it down, with my dangerous looking plant in hand. My anger boiling over me, my aggression brought forward so that all the world could see. I was ready to fight and I screamed out loud with anger as that light showed me all the room had to offer, "your dead!" .... well I don't think my sisters dog quite expected that. He leaped about ten inches into the air and wet the floor. I guess he did not find the sudden appearance of me running around the corner with plant in hand yelling, appealing. The thing is, I have made this mistake so many times before. Where I hear something someone said, or read something someone sends me and I get all upset. I start adding words to it, and seeing the person saying it in a way they would never do. Then I build up and build up my anger and frustration with all these useless weapons of "I will say this" and "I will point out this" statements. Then I will go to see that person and they are like the most friendliest people I ever knew, I mention the problem and we talk things out and laugh about it later. Especially after I left the Witnesses, I always thought my family or my wife's family would say things against us. After all, that was what we expected, right? Well I do not know how many times my wife and I would sit there going, "well if they say this, we can point out that" and "if they bring this up, let's let them know about this." In the end though, I can count on one hand how many negative conversations I really had with them. I set in the other room, or at home, thinking I would see this problem or that problem. I would be grabbing all the weapons I could grab with thoughts and reasoning. I would get my heart beating high and my thoughts ablaze with anticipation and you know what happened most of the time? I walked into a room of animals jumping and peeing themselves, because I brought so much hostility to the room. So as I have grown older and more mature in my way of dealing with people. I find that now, I just focus on going to see them with a nice positive thought and it seems that things stay that way. So basically, if you don't bring the battle and grab those useless plant weapons. You tend to find a nice little dog to pet, and not the demon or enemy you thought was out there. The only thing is though ... "I still think my sister's dog is scared of me" My thought Dragon
Edited by - kenpodragon on 17 October 2002 12:59:37