New World Translation Sales Skyrocket

by The_Bad_Seed 2 Replies latest jw friends

  • The_Bad_Seed
    The_Bad_Seed

    Leading economists were stunned by new reports of a substantial increase in sales of Jehovahs Witnesses version of the Bible - New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures over the last six weeks.

    "Get whats left of your money out of Nortel or Enron," advised top bible industry leader Ted Jaracz. New World Translations are hot, hot, hot right now. Sales have been steadily rising all summer, and as the end approaches, we see no signs of decline."

    Has-been actor Kevin Costner, who's career has turned into a reported smoldering pile of ash, was seen reading a New World Translation in Aspen Colorado inside the gas station kiosk he now works in, as was Friends castmember Jennifer Aniston, caught poolside by the paparazzi at her Beverly Hills mansion. And despite reports of The New World Translations alleged flagrant misuse of words such as "Jehovah", and rewording of several scriptures, many other well known celebrities remain dedicated New World Tranlation readers. Some even admit to having a favorite specific chapter, and verse.

    "As this catches on, and it is catching on, things could get big, real big" marveled the insider. "Take out a sizeable loan, Sell your home, your family, your belongings. You just can't go wrong with this bible."

    Edited by - the_bad_seed on 27 December 2002 0:9:35

  • Michael Collins
    Michael Collins

    Fine piece of satire. Especially the part about Kevin Cosner.

    Michael

  • ugg
    ugg

    when i first started reading it,,,i thought it was true!!! (ugg,,,,of the dufuss class)

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