by johnathanseagull 7 Replies latest jw friends
Do you remember the "Marked Ones" within your cong, I remember a couple who you could see were trying there damm bloody hardest to be accepted within the congregation, always sat at the back never "invited into the fold" fully and there was always the "Hmmmm dont associate with them too much, they are spiritually weak etc etc" I remember feeling so sorry for them but I just had to adhere to Jah and his organisational ways.............sheesh !!! and I was told that was being christian.
J Gull
Of course I remember, I was one of those marked ones. Wasn't doing anything wrong mind you,, but didn't belong to a family with the mommy and daddy and all that jazz, so I guess they figured I was doing SOMETHING, but truth was, the more they ignored me, the better I got, the more Pious I became till I could pass for a monk (monkess? female???) anyway, it wasn't always for something someone did, just for not being "quite right". Damn hypocritcal bastards.
they are spiritually weak etc etc"
I was marked too. Funny thing is, that if it weren't for the lack christain compassion, I wouldn't have been resentful and walked away from it all. Being "marked" did me a great favor in allowing me to step away and examine this cult for what it is.
There are 2 ways to be "marked."
Officially,
The elders talk to you privately about some action, e.g., dating a non-JW, and the scriptural reasons why this is wrong.
If you don't continue dating this person, then a talk is given during the service meeting about dating a non-JW, how that is bad according to the Bible, and how we should not associate socially with such ones.
Unofficially,
Sisters and brothers talk about you behind your back about something someone said you did. They don't go to the elders about it but spread it throughout the congregation that you are bad association spiritually.
You find out and trace it to its source, find out that the person who said you did the "bad" thing was mistaken. Everyone still avoids you because they don't want to apologize or admit they were wrong. The elders tell you to overlook it with "love."
Blondie
Johnathan, I remember very well the "marked ones".
I still proudly wear my "mark" (where it is I'm not sure though it must have gotten much more hideous because at least six million people won't talk to me now).
The "marked ones" were folks just like you and me. The types who if you took the time, well they'd be just about the best friends you could find anywhere.
If there's one lesson in the JW practice of "marking" it certainly isn't the one they intend it to be. It's one that is true across all aspects of society. Don't follow the crowd in who you decide to associate with. If you do, you're bound to miss out on some good friendships.
Mike.
I was marked, too. My uncle, the HBEWIC, told me that many of the Dads and Moms in the Congregation didn't like the way I looked at their daughters.
What I think was really pissin' them off was the way their daughters were returning the look.
I was younger then. Later I was marked for having opinions of my own about things that the elders couldn't refute. And of course, that was because I was one of them college boys.
And then there were my clothes. Pretty up-to-date they thought, just because I refused to wear white sox with a business suit - and laughed at them when they did it. Openly. In their faces.
And then there was the coupe de` grace: I was neither impressed by the elders, nor fearful of them. At All. And they REALLY didn't like that. That made me a trouble maker. And they were right. I was out after blood. Theirs. And I got some too.
God, I had a blast now that I think of it. Maybe I'll rejoin and do it all over again. (Just kidding)
francois
I was of the "unofficially marked" class that Blondie refers to. I just laughed it off, even at 13 because the friend's aunt, who told her that I was "marked" by the circuit had never even met me. I was 13 for God's sake! I thought the whole thing was ridiculous, considering I never really did anything worthy of "marking" (that is until they labeled me and I figured that I might as well earn it, even if it was after the fact!)
I remember a couple who you could see were trying there damm bloody hardest to be accepted within the congregation, always sat at the back never "invited into the fold" fully and there was always the "Hmmmm dont associate with them too much, they are spiritually weak etc etc" I remember feeling so sorry for them but I just had to adhere to Jah and his organisational ways.............sheesh !!! and I was told that was being christian.
yes , JWS can be so cruel. And to people who are obiviously trying. Why else would anyone endure sitting in the back, not being spoken to, not invited to even a baby shower .
and blondie is so right about unoffical marking. Anyone can do that-for any reason. U don't even have to tell anyone u have marked someone- if u are an elder or MS and it is noticed u do not speak or associate or invite to your home /picincs, certain people-well the rest of the cong will follow suite.
And yes they will gossip to anyone who'll listen. also, don't PO someone, especially a popular person, or u will find yourself friendless. They will not speak to u b/c of what u did to "so and so" I have actual experience with this one.
It is so degrading what they do to people, with DF, marking, reproving./probation(don't think they use that anymore) it is a wonder there are not morre suicides in th org.
