I wrote the following on my blog...and I thought it was a little piece of me that would be nice to share with all of you. ~~~~~~ I was adopted by my grandparents when my mother took her life 21 years ago. Through this, my uncles became my brothers and my grandparents became my parents. Weird, huh? I of course drew very close to them over the years, and about 5 years ago one of them, Charlie, passed away from complications due to AIDS. He was the sweetest guy, and sad to say spent much of his life in prison for crimes he committed to feed his drug habit. My other brother Ray is still around, well at least sometimes, and is fast approaching his 50th birthday. Ray is handsome, smart, funny as hell, and an all around fascinating person. When he enters a room, every head turns. He has this presence that I can't form into words, this depth... Ray is just one of those "special" people. He is so smart, so very smart, I just know to my very core he could have really done some amazing things with his life. Enter drug abuse, and this explains as to why I say he COULD have and SHOULD have done grand things, but never afforded himself the chance. Right now, Ray is sober and off of drugs, but I have seen it before, time and time again. He battles with a life long addiction to heroin, and as wrong as this may sound... and as harsh it may seem for me to judge him, I know it is only a matter of time before he goes back to all that sh*t once again. I have seen it far too many times to know what lies in store. The last time I saw him, that handsome face just wasn't glowing the way it used to, and it seemed the years of self-abuse were finally taking it's toll. It is almost as if I barely recognize him behind the sunken eyes and pale skin, this face that was once so beautiful women would throw themselves at his feet. The sad thing is, he was on a drug binge when mom passed away early last year, and he never even bothered showing up while she was sick and dying in the hospital, or even to her funeral. I remember calling him, hearing his slurred voice on the other line, barely coherent to what just happened or the fact he lost the one person who cares the most. His own mother. What a waste of such an amazing life. What a f**king waste.
It's A Shame About Ray
The Lemonheads
I've never been too good with names
The cellar door was open I could never stay away
I know it's probly not my place
It's either or I'm hoping for a simple way of saying
It's a shame about Ray
In the stone under the dust his name is still engraved
Some things need to go away
It's a shame about Ray
If I make it through today
I'll know tomorrow not to put my feelings out on display
I'll put the cobwebs back in place
I've never been too good with names but I remember faces
Edited by - MrMoe on 6 January 2003 20:39:51