Are we obligated to JW family?

by Granny Linda 7 Replies latest jw friends

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  Granny Linda

  While reading through and posting in unbeliever's thread, this topic came to mind.

  Personally I do not have any sense of obligation to JW family that still holds to such dogma. That means it doesn't matter to me that my mother ignores her grandson; and her great-grandchildren. And they were never JW. My son who now has a family of his own certainly has no obligation to such people, either. Yet we understand the importance of family. So the real loser's in life are those who refuse to set their religion aside - yet think they are deserving of our devotion. So what's your thinking on this?

  granny
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  DIAMOND

  Granny Linda,

  Kinda early in the morning to have such wise and serious matters weighing on your mind. But I agree with you 100%. My mother is just like that. Not going to see her grandkids because my brother and his wife don't attend meetings. Thats crazy. Ignoring them because of a descision that there parents made. She only sees mine because my wife still goes and I go on occasion. My daughter would be devastated if her grandmother stopped coming around. And how do you explain that to a child. Why the persons house we go over to eat every Sunday the person that takes you to the store to buy you anything you want your babysitter when school is out. The person that comes to get you just because.....Is no longer coming around. My daughter would be screwed up for life. This is one crazy religion

  Diamond
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  DIAMOND

  Oh yea I have more. They WILL miss out. On everything important. They will miss out on graduations . They will miss out on weddings. They will miss out on the birth of their children. They will miss out on the phone calls and the visits that they will not get paid. I don't care what anyone of them say. They WILL miss these things. If they say they won't they are lying. I could never imagine doing that or missing out on all that with my own children. I get upset now when my daughter has some activity at school and she dosen't tell me about it. Its there loss. To damn bad!!!!

  Diamond
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  CyrusThePersian

  Hi!

  I understand where you are coming from. I just recently became disillusioned with the "truth" and recently reconnected with a long disfellowshipped cousin with whom I had been close as a child. It was heartbreaking all the things I had missed out on in his life. I am sure that many JW's are acutely aware of the things they will miss when they choose the meanderings of some old men in Brooklyn over their families and loved ones but they do it anyway. Poor saps. When they are old and grey and the paradise still hasn't come I wonder how many will realize that they missed out on the true paradise with their loved ones.

  Cyrus

  P.S. First post btw!
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  Scully

  Welcome Cyrus!!

  Granny Linda, I've been thinking about that too.

  For all the emotional abuse that JWs heap on us - particularly the older generation who frequently ignores their children and grandchildren who never "made The Truth TM their own" - what they don't realize is that eventually, they will reap what they sow.

  How they can expect anything else, is beyond me.

  Love, Scully
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  scootergirl

  They will reap what they sow. My family obligation (to my parents) stopped a long time ago. They chose to shunn me.......well, consequence is that I don't want them in my life anymore. Let's hope that the ever lovin' dubs are there for them when they need them........cause I won't be. I have my own wonderful family to take care of.
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  Shakita

  Reminds me of the saying....

  Be nice to your children, they will pick your nursing home one day.

  Mrs. Shakita
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  leokio

  Good topic Granny Linda.

  My parents have never been strong in the 'truth' nor have 3 of my brothers. One sister married into a strong JW family and the other married a man who was devout and considered strong. I walked away over 20 years ago and live out of state. I have a family of my own and seldom see the rest of the family partly because of geography and partly because I believe in letting sleeping dogs lie. Over the years I had several occasions to visit with these family members in their home court and always try to make it a point to keep the visits short and confine the conversation to fluff topics. This isn't the kind of relationship I prefer but it has been better than nothing.I always felt that if I tried to challenge their beliefs, I'd only make things worse for myself. I always assumed that if I opened that can of worms, I'd run the risk of being df'ed somehow and then I'd have absolutely NO relationship with at least my 2 sisters nor my parents. I love my parents and sisters and would do almost anything for them if ever called on to do so and believe that in a case of serious need, I could do the same. If through whatever theocratic, watchtower, JW mumbo-jumbo I were to be df'ed after all these years, I would become the 'enemy' and not just the wayward, misguided son who may "someday come back to the 'truth' ". Of course, I never will and I think they know this. But as long as they haven't been officially banned from associating with me, they haven't broken any rules.

  So, are we obligated to JW family? I don't feel obligated to the JW part but I will always feel obligated to the family part just because they are 'FAMILY'. I will never feel differently about this, even if they should someday be instructed by the WTS to totally shun me for the sake of their beliefs. While I can't afford to dwell on it, I do hold out the hope that some day they might find their way to freedom from the Watchtower cult. Reading post on this site over the past year from former JW's from virtually every walk of JW life has helped to fuel this hope. If this never happens, then I'll be thankfull for the what I have. As limited as it is, it's better than nothing.

  Leo