CIA Announces New Plan to Capture bin Laden
After weeks of bombing, the U.S. military has a new plan to capture Osama bin Laden. They're running a Personals ad in several Afghan newspapers.
"Quite frankly, we're betting he's as horny as a marching band," said one high-ranking CIA source.
The ad reads "READY TO DO SOME EVIL? Hot, slender thirty something single female megalomaniac looking for tall, skeletal globe-threatening madman to share the good life: hiding in caves, making spooky videos, and jihad! No smokers, please."