Recently I have been hearing the phrase,"TOUGH LOVE", anyone know where this phrase originated from? What is TOUGH LOVE all about? When would you use it,and, on whom?Have you ever used it on someone,if you did what resulted from it? I really would appreciate some input on this as it was used on me recently.I really don't understand how LOVE can be expressed as being TOUGH. Thanks,Blueblades
TOUGH LOVE?
by Blueblades 3 Replies latest jw friends
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abbagail
I "think" it means something like: "I'm giving you some In Yo Face Honesty about YOUR problems, for your own good, and without the Bull."
I first heard a friend use the phrase over a decade ago when describing his stint in a drug-treatment facility about 20 years prior to that (circa early 70's). He said they used "Tough Love" to get the druggies to face their own manipulative thinking, behavior, etc. I always thought it sounded like a really MEAN way of dealing with people. My brain was still full of scriptural thinking on the matter, to reprove and discipline with love, compassion, mildness, etc.
Any psychologists on the board? Maybe they could explain it better. I would guess a "more modern" version of Tough Love would be the Dr. Phil Tell-It-Like-It-Is approach, lol! Another thought is when they send the teenagers to "boot camps" for discipline problems. That's also referred to as Tough Love.
HTH.
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Marcos
Im not sure if "TOUGH LOVE" was an outgrowth of pop-psychology or not but my first exposure to the term was as a means of encouraging your own kids to stop using drugs. Seems to me this first surfaced in the 70s but I'm not sure, old age and all.
The scenario is this: If your kid insists that he is old enough to do whatever he wants then, even though it was painful for you, you had to tell him to either stop with the drugs NOW or to get out of your house. The theory was that you hoped he would not leave but that if he did the cold reality of life would hit him in the face and he would realize that being in your house under your rules was by far preferable to living on the street.
Sometimes it worked.
Im not so sure about now
Marcos
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Blueblades
Does the Society use tough love by dfing policy?