I guess you can tell I am a picture posting fool today. And yeah, I am going down memory lane as I go thru this old pictures . I ran across this one, of my dad, he was 18 in 1964. On the back of the pictures is a personal message he wrote to my mom, it reads......."Lura, May God keep and bless you always,,,,,,,,,, Love Always, ID Dec. 5, 1964
Notice the cross he is wearing he was very much Catholic,,,, I wonder how things would have turned out if they would have stayed in that religion instead of joining the JW's.
This is the way I remember the man I loved so much at one time, when my dad acted like my dad. He was everything to me as a little girl and I loved him dearly. He taught me to love God , and I remember the very early years he tried to do the right thing with us, even thou it was JW. When I turned 9 things changed alot,,,,,, he got invovled in big business, big power at the Kingdom hall, and started to ignore my mothers problems. I guess looking back I do understand why he was so sick of her drug abuse, but I always wondered if he would have given her just one more chance.
But I don't want to dwell on those later years, when he became a hard and cold man. I want to look at this picture of a young man who had lots of dreams, and ambition. He loved his family and I do think he loved me when I was little. I know looking back at pictures of him when he was younger I miss that person he was . I wonder if he looks or even has any of my pictures anymore, and looks at them and remembers a daughter who worshipped him so much. I was very much Daddy's girl. I hope beyond hope, that someday we will make peace. But it came down to chosing my own conscience and tell him the truth, that I didnt beleive in JW at the risk of him ,never speaking to me again. I took the risk and I knew how it would be. I havent talk to my dad in going on a year and a half.
I am bitter at the JW religion for making it easy for him to cast me aside , he was able to use it as an excuse to brush me out of his life and memory for good. I guess I was a painful reminder of a past he doesnt want to surface. I don't know if I cross his mind, but he crosses mine, mostly I am mad and angry, hurt when he does. But I ran across this picture of him and felt a little peace, knowing that I knew him back when he loved his first family. I guess these are the things we hold on to,,,the memories and pictures,, because the void we have with our shunning families and the way they treat us now, just breaks our hearts.