After 15 years, finally living for real

by La Capra 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • La Capra
    La Capra

    It was in October of 1987, as a 19 year old, raised as a Jehovah's Witness, that I disassociated from them. I have had countless emotional, relationship and professional struggles that I know came from the years of mental control, training to be judgmental, and the culture of everything being all right or all wrong. When I disassociated, I promised myself that when I reached the point where I had more days out than in (it's about four years from now) that I would truly celebrate my freedom-the crossing point when I can no longer say I was a Jehovah's Witness for most of my life.

    Granted the number of days is a technicality, I am somewhat attached to them as a symbolic concept (and besides, I am totally into numbers).

    In anticipation of this event, I decided to go back to school to become a lawyer. I also took a brave step, met with the Rabbi and have started my conversion to the religion that, in my heart, I know I have always been (All that Torah reading instead of paying attention at meetings and assemblies).

    When I was in college I chose an easy career with high demand-teaching math. While I love mathematics and know I am doing something very important and valuable to my students-it wasn't "for real". It was just until I figured out who I was. The mistake in that was that while I was good at it, it distracted me from decision making and ultimately, living a real life. (Anyone out there in college with the same plan-think carefully before going through with it).

    A few years back, I hurt a man terribly by accepting his marriage proposal when I knew deep down he had habits I would never accept. But since I wasn't really living who I was anyway, it didn't matter right? Wrong. I did the right thing and broke things off with him before the wedding (but not before he went out and bought a beautiful new suit and I went out and bought the gown).

    Since I started Law School last June, I have been putting in a whole-hearted dedication into my studies. I have never done this before. I have never studied and worked so hard in my life. And all the while I was doing this, I had no idea whether I was studying enough, learning enough, writing well enough, all that stuff-there were no quizes along the way.

    We had midterms in December and we just got our scores last week, and the grade distributions for each class was posted today. I am very proud to be able to say that I did well. I earned the highest grade in both contracts and torts and while I didn't earn the highest grade in crimes, I was only three points under the highest grade.

    I have done well in school generally-but when I did I was generally just going through the motions and not really throwing my soul into it. The satisfaction (even without knowing the rankings) I feel is completely new and wondrous. I can't believe what I have been missing all these years. This is totally awesome.

    Shalom, Shoshana

  • reubenfine
    reubenfine

    Good for you, La Capra. It's your life and it looks like you're "spending" it. I just know you are going to make one outstanding lawyer, as well as anything else you try. It's great to live, isn't it??

  • email
    email

    Pretty inspiring post

    Those "little" things in life is what really makes it worth living it... I wish you success in your career...

    Soon we'll have a new lawer on the board ... keep us posted!

  • CyrusThePersian
    CyrusThePersian

    Hi!

    As soon as you pass the bar mail me your business card. I could always use a good lawyer, and you sound like you're on the way to being one of the best!

    Cyrus

    P.S. I was born of ethnic Jewish parents who became Witnesses before I was born. I, too, feel the pull of Judaism pulling me back 'home".I can't explain it, but it's there.

    Take Care and I'll see you at Temple

    Cyrus

  • LovesDubs
    LovesDubs

    Wow...that was an awesome post. Congratulations on doing so well! You are working your butt off and its paying off for you. I hope this ends up being what you really truly wanted. But life is funny...you may decide to change lanes again somewhere down the road and try something else new :) I admire people who have the guts and the drive to go after what they want.

  • LovesDubs
    LovesDubs

    Edited by - LovesDubs on 21 January 2003 11:41:56

  • cruzanheart
    cruzanheart

    Congratulations, La Capra! You sound as though you have found the serenity for which you have been searching, and I'm happy for you. Now, a few words of advice for when you start on your practice of law: be nice to your secretary! It might be me! (But only if you end up in Dallas practicing civil lit.)

    Nina

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    Fantastic! Now you must use your lawyer powers for good and not evil.

    Shalom y'all.

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