RANT WARNING-subject: MEN

by Ravyn 4 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Ravyn

  ok, I have been living in exiled in fundyland TN for 3 yrs now while my dear husband has bee trying to figure out what he wants to do with his(and My) life after having somehow lost his 20's.

  Finally figured it out and gets a good job, to be laid off in less than a yr. Not his fault--this I understand. But I am the one online every night checking the baords for employment and posting resumes. I am not saying he didn't try to find work, he did---after the first 6 weeks. BUT I found the job and he is now working again and we are getting ready to move. fast forward>>>>>>>>>

  New job, they are willing to pay for move, and first and security on new house-AS A LOAN- that we pay back at $25 a paycheck(at which rate would take about 2 yrs to pay off!) OK, fine. So the boss tells DH that he would PREFER we move ourselves and save some money. I am in a wheel chair part time and this move is 6 hours one way and I don't drive. So we get packers in here to pack since I cant do it alone and husband is now working 6 hours away. $495. no problem send boss the bill. fine. find house to rent--which I DID ONLINE and made all the arrangements, broke the bad news to current landlord, got the references together and credit checks etc.......... fine ok-boss will write out a check on the 15th for first and security. wonderful! almost too good to be true! reserve moving truck, which I DID ONLINE AGAIN. wonderful pick it up tomorrow(friday) afternoon-call bosss from rental office to get the credit card number to pay for truck. Husband comes to TN with buddy from work in company van to pick up moving truck, load on Friday, I clean house on Saturday morning, load up three cats and dog into company van which DH drives and buddy drives moving truck--all on our merry way way by Saturday afternoon. Sound good? It should. It was my plan. The plan that I did totally myself with just a telephone and pc. BUUUUUUUUT NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  A MAN has to change MY plan. Boss decides to go off to Orlando with family and not tell DH. Second Boss in charge says no buddy from work to help you drive. WHEN DO I GET THIS INFO? TONIGHT! TONIGHT! at 10:52 PM I get this info when DH is supposed to be getting a wake up call at 4AM to come down here to move us back up there! I dont know anyone in VIRGINIA! I have no one here in TN! And get this! DH had a rough day working and is grumpy and does not want to discuss it. he says YOU call the boss and raise HE11...I am too tired I had bad day........

  Second Boss says tow the van and drive it up yourselves. Penske says the van cant be towed--it is too big(1994 chevy piece of crap panel van) and second boss wont return my phone calls. So DH comes up with this brilliant idea:

  he comes down here, finds who-knows-who to go up and pick up moving van with him, loads it, parks company van in Walmart parking lot, drives moving truck with me in front seat holding three cat cages and a 100# dog on my lap 6 hours, drops me off at a house which is supposed to be paid by boss in orlando and will have new landlord waiting for us, drives 6 more hours back to TN with who-knows-who(if he cant find someone on friday why does he think he will find someone on saturday? this is the cable business--they work on saturdays too) then turns around and drives 6 hours AGAIN to get back to Bedford...and then after unpacking the truck and returning it and helping me set up enough of the house to live in returns to work bright and early Monday morning (which is incidentally 3 hrs away from there for the next 8 weeks....)

  ALL BECOZ SOME STUPID MAN DOES NOT WANT TO SPEND THE EXTRA MONEY TO GET IT DONE RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!

  I have the electricity off in this house as of Saturday night. The landlord here expects it clean and is going to be showing it on Sunday. I CANNOT STAY HERE PAST SATURDAY. ALL THIS WOULD TAKE IS ONE PERSON TO RIDE DOWN TOMORROW WITH MY DH AND DRIVE BACK UP THE NEXT FRIGGIN DAY!
  WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO BE SO HARD?

  If DH comes here with no one to drive, then that means two people from 6 hours away will have to drive down on Saturday(so one can drive THAT vehicle back up there).

  Is this so hard? I told DH to tell the boss we would PAY someone to ride down. $100. $200. take it on the bill! The boss is saving about $1000 insisting we do it this way anyway! AND IT IS NOT EVEN HIS MONEY! We will pay it back--sign a contract!

  This is a man thing. I am telling you all right now--if men were not involved in this, it would have worked just fine.

  I don't know what to do. I told DH that he will be going up to the office(3hrs away from where he is now) tomorrow morning at 4 AM and he will sit in that office until they figure it all out. I told him not to even come to TN without a driver. and if they think he can do all this and then show up for work Monday morning they are nuts! (DH does have some control over this--he is the QC Manager, not just a laborer-and THEY MADE THIS DEAL-not me! ALL I DID WAS MAKE IT WORK.) Either that or I told him we will leave the company van down here in Walmart parkinglot and they can figure out how to get it back.

  So---anyone near I-81 Central VA corridor(Roanoke to Bristol)who wants to go for a little ride and make a $100? I got a bed for you to sleep in and will feed you....I am serious. If anyone in that general area wants to help out email me privately and I will give you my phone number. I will be up all night. CoonDawg--where do you live now? You dont need a CDL to drive a 25 foot Penske....

  Ravyn
• 

  gsx1138

  I didn't work for close to 18 months when my wife and I were first married. Women and Men have different pressures. Men are expected and raised to be assertive, in control, make logical descisions, and make the right descisions. This is a hold over from an older time when a man could get a job and support an entire family. Those days are long gone but the lessons are still taught. When things start to go bad he may have the energy to fight back but eventually it wears him down. I was gung ho to get a job but after about 2 months I was too depressed to bother. I finally was forced to get a job with the threat of divorce from my wife. Once I was working again I was much happier (this is really sad because it is obvious we are conditioned in this manner).

  It is frustrating for the woman because she was conditioned for different types of roles. Guys will come on here and act enlightened (myself included) but even the priviledge of patriarchal society requires us to fill expected roles. I did know from an early age that there is no way in hell I would marry a woman who didn't have a college degree or at least a job. Yet, I expected my wife to make those concessions for me. I thank the Goddess that she did because now I'm much stronger. Despite all of my ramblings I don't really have any advice. I hope things turn out well for you.
• 

  Francois

  There is no advice to give I don't think, gsx, and I don't think Ravyn really wanted any. I think she wanted to vent and she did and I hope she feels better.

  Your point that roles are changing for both sexes, but that men are expected to play both the old and the new is right on. Look at what feminism has done to the male/female relationship, still the men are supposed to be the main support.

  And lots of this isn't cultural. It's a load placed on the backs of families by the NEWNITED STATES GUMMINT. Don't believe it? You take a look at the incomes and the income taxes of the typical married couple today. What you will notice is that Partner A (usually, but not always, the guy) is making the lion's share of the money. Partner B is paying the income and withholding taxes for A & B together. If the gummint wasn't confiscating so much in taxes, this would not be happening.

  I have a friend whose wife makes well over $120,000 a year. He made $70,000 a year. Using round numbers when taxes are figured and compared as A) married filing joint, B) married filing separately, what becomes totally obvious is that HE was working solely to pay the taxes on their joint income, because if he was not working at all, they would be bringing home the SAME amount of money. So, when he was laid off in the latest telecom flop, he didn't go out and get a job. He builds decks, beautiful ones for cash and they've now got more money than they know what to do with.

  It does not make any sense, yet the American people accept it. And that makes even less sense. Look at the behavior of the American public. Each time all the banks get together and announce that there is going to be another increase of twenty-five cents in each teller machine transaction, the public goes NUTS ! Irate phone calls go to the bank presidents, to congressional representatives, to U.S. senators, to governors; letters to the editor are received in newspaper offices all across the land by the bushel; goats are sacrificed at midnight; it's ugly, it's very ugly indeed.

  BUT let congress decide to increase income taxes, to tax social security benefits THREE times, to tax dividends TWO times, to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars studying the armpit sweat of the Abos in Oz, or violin varnish on a Strad, or you name the harebrained scheme, where are the American people? Still pissing and wheezing about a twenty-five cent increase in teller machine transactions, and not a peep about the confiscatory government taxation policy. And the democrats have got it rigged so that they can lie about what they've done while telling the truth.

  How many of you are aware that there is a built-in increase in spending for each government department and program. I forget what they call it, but take it from me, it's there. Say that the U.S. Department of ABC has a built-in, automatic increase scheduled into its budget by congress of, say, 15 percent. OK, along comes a Republican controlled senate or house or both, and they hold the Department of ABC to only a 9 percent increase in its budget. What happens? The democrat party and the Secretary of the Department of ABC start screaming at the top of their lungs that the nasty, mean ol' Republican party has "CUT" their budget by SIX percent. Six. And the American public buys this garbage in the large economy size, they eat it up with a spoon. "Those nasty Republicans cut ABC six percent Mildred, it's awful."

  All this and what really happened is that the Department of ABC got a NINE percent budget INCREASE. And Daschle and Gephardt and now Pelosi stand before the American people like the cat that ate the canary, the cage, and the bird stand, and tell the people that the Republicans CUT ABC's budget. They do not deserve to receive ONE vote from you good people. Is that honest what I describe here? NO. And when it's the Social Security budget we're talking about, the democrat party REALLY goes ballistic in its attempt to scare the bejesus out of senior citizens, to whom six percent is a BIG number. They drag out the fireworks, they drag out the likes of that unspeakable Sharpton Ass from New York and God knows who all. They used to drag out Jesse, the REVRUN, until he got caught with his slide rule stuck in the wrong equation. But no more.

  Listen up folks, we have a greedy, grasping monster on the Potomac who will not be happy until they've got ALL your money so that they can give you little pieces of it back in vote buying schemes. You like this? Keep voting democrat. Yes, the republicans aren't angels either, but the charge is being led by those double-dealing, thinly veiled neo-Marxists like Daschle, Pelosi, Gephardt, Cynthia McKinney, Charles Wrangle, and the rest of those devil may care democrat party idiots someone keeps putting back in there like foxes in charge of the hen house.

  Wouldn't it be nice for mom to stay home with the kids if she wanted to? I think that should be a family's choice. But the government has taken away that choice by increasing taxes to the point where, as above, B pays the taxes for A & B, or they'd by God starve. And at the same time, all my friends in the military in the enlisted ranks are being paid so little that they have to get on public assistance and food stamps !!! Thank you Bill Clinton you bastard. What a way to thank the people who put their butts on the line for us. It breaks the heart.

  Nice rant Ravyn. You inspired me to new heights.

  francois
• 

  Ravyn

  omg! I inspired Francois? I am honored.

  still looking for someone anywhere from Roanoke to Knoxville who is willing to drive.....if two show on Saturday it will still work....husband is on his way here now-alone.

  Ravyn
• 

  Francois

  Yes you did. You inspired me to new heights. Thanks

  And what are you doing about all that traveling you've got to do in light of the storm that's headed your way dropping FEET of snow all over the place? I'll bet when next we hear from you with the latest installment of this drama, you're going to be even higher off the ground.

  This is getting really good (rubs hands together in excited anticipation).

  francois