Just a little something I wrote:
*****
I wonder, if my life had started differently,
What kind of person would I be?
When others feel they can at last
Describe the things buried in their past,
Would I understand the heartache they feel?
Or would it not seem as real?
Would I be one of those beyond caring,
When broken hearts their souls are baring?
Or would I shed tears of pain and understanding,
As they reveal the extent of their suffering?
I wonder if I would still be
The naïve girl my parents expect of me.
Would I still be blind to the lies and untruth
That had been drummed into my head in my youth?
Would I still believe unquestioningly
Only what they want me to see?
Or would I rejoice that I have discovered
The truth that has been uncovered?
I wonder if I would still belong to an organisation
Whose members are excited about death and destruction?
Would I still eagerly anticipate
Billions of people meeting a grisly fate?
Would I still think that I was showing others real love
While hoping for their annihilation from above?
Or would I have learned what it really means to show
True and lasting love to those I know?
I wonder if I would still have my family
If things had been different for me.
Would they have pushed me away
Because I have chosen my own way?
Would they still pretend that I am dead
Even though the Bible they cherish has said,
A person who neglects his family
Is worse than any person without faith could be?
Would they still tell my brother lies
So they don’t look bad in his eyes?
Would he know the real reason we had to part?
Or would his love for me be gone from his heart?
Would he still have grown up thinking I didn’t care?
Or would he be allowed to know the truth I want to share?
Would my dear brother still be lost to me
Because of the truth they won’t let him see?
Would my sister, my best friend
Have said our relationship had to end?
Because her religious leaders have said,
That I am as good as dead.
If I could show her everything I have learned
Would her world be overturned?
Would she still feel the same
Or would her actions bring her shame?
Would I even have met
The best thing to happen to me yet?
Would I have even given him a chance?
Or would I have not spared a second glance?
If I still believed what I was told was right,
Would I have let him into my heart that fateful night?
Would I have agreed to become his wife?
Or would I have missed out on the love of my life?
So even though I experienced much pain,
There was something positive to gain.
No longer do I believe in lies.
I can see now with my own eyes.
No longer do I allow to dominate
Those who choose not to love, but to hate.
And though I miss some things about my past,
At least I know true love at last.
If my past had been written differently,
I wonder if I would still be me.