by Xandria 6 Replies latest jw friends
Is Ziggy right ?
Do we think we do not deserve to be happy at times.. I wonder. There are times I feel unworthy of certain things, but then my husband says "Snap out of it!". Many here exhibit that trait too. That some how they are unworthy or feel like it is beyond them.. to be happy in life.
What do you think ?
Xandria
Xandria my favorite saying on this subject is; "Happiness is an inside job."
It is something we all have to work on being happy.......then again being happy isn't the end all. Living life with peace of mind, knowing you have the tools to handle the speed bumps of life is really what it's all about. You learn how to do this by doing the "inside" job.
my .02
Katie
In the past several years, I've realized that "happiness" and "joy" are two different things to me. "Happiness" is something external, giving me a positive emotion. "Joy" is the internal peace that gives me a satisfaction in life, whether things are going well or not. Happiness (imho) is an emotion and not really that valuable. (Although it is enjoyable!) Joy, on the other hand, is a choice. I choose to live in a state of "joy", where no matter what external elements in life hand me, I can still have peace in heart, mind, and soul that I'll survive successfully and come out enriched. I know not everyone agrees with my personal beliefs, but this "joy" was not a part of my life until I became a Christian. That truly made the difference to me!
Andi
Hi Xandria,
A wise person once told me: "It is an irrational thought to believe that something is wrong if you don't feel happy." Sometimes you just wake up and feel crappy... or blah, or even just "even".... due to lack of sleep, hormones, stress, etc.
Sometimes things just are they way they are, and we worry about how they got that way... like it is all under our control - as if!
:somehow they are unworthy or feel like it is beyond them.. to be happy in life.
You mentioned feeling "unworthy" a couple of times in your post... perhaps you are feeling guilty for stuff that you have done, should have done, coulda done, etc.... guilt sux... it takes a lot of effort to unthink your way out of it sometimes, especially when you have been programmed and conditioned to go along a certain path (dictated by freaks who want your compliance) or you'll be destroyed.
It's hard to add to what bikerchic and Andee said, but if knowing someone cares about how you're feeling helps, here you go.
hugs, lauralisa
Well if you are wondering what brought all this on.. weell I had a nightmare. I was trapped in the K.H. and I could not get out. As we all know there are no windows, no air, etc. The "brothers" were hounding me and then would not listen to my replies. Then my husband was in the dream..you know how dreams suddenly change. An he was making them listen. But they would not change, etc. I woke with a start and thought "WHAT the...."?
An I began to reflect. I realized that I felt bad for not being able to reason.. and guilty that I was out and they were still "in". But you cannot save someone who will not listen. The feelings of unworthiness come from being told you are unworthy of this or that. I have to remind myself.. I am worthy, people like me, and damn it I am worth it. Thank you SNL.
I guess it is the WTS thinking.. I thought I got rid of it all. But sometimes I guess it lurks in the back of the mind waiting for a weak moment to rear up and smack you. Thank you for the sweet posts they help put some things in to persepective again.
Strange how dreams can bring up the inner demons.
Ziggy is right happiness is seeing things in a different way. We were taught to think trapped inside the box that there is nothing of merit outside of the box.
Xandria
Thanks for telling us more, Xandria... it's a full time job, for me, thinking thru this guilt crap. I love your posts; they are always illuminating and thought-provoking. LOL @ the SNL quote. I literally used to put post-its around with little 'affirmations' on them.... I think they even helped
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I can't believe I spelled your name wrong. I can not edit my posts. In fact, getting some space between actual paragraphs is about the best I can do format-wise. DUH time a million times a billion....
Agh, laura
Thank you Laura.. this is funny too.
You have to find humor in somethings. It helps.
