Next-door.

Vivamus

For the most part of my life, I have lived in this small community, in this quiet street, next to this older couple. I think I have lived next door to them for almost twenty years. In all that time the only contact I had with them, was when we both were in our garden at the same time, or when we saw each other at the grocery store. I have never set foot in their house, and I have never had them over for coffee in mine. Today I got one of those cards that make you drop every thing you are doing. It made me walk silently towards my letter-opener, and I opened it with the thought of "god lord, who?...". It was an invitation for the funeral of my neighbor. It is amazing that I can live next door these people, and never really got to know them. Our lives are lived so close by each other, yet we have never shared our lives experiences, or our funny stories. And I am humbled to realize I am capable of such indifference to the wellbeing of people that live so close by me. While our world is expanding with an enormous rate, and we feel like we are citizens of the world, and we get all worked up and angry at injustice done at the other side of the globe, I lost the quality of caring about what was happening next-door.

JH

It is amazing that I can live next door these people, and never really got to know them.

Most neighbors are strangers today. They don't talk to us, and we don't talk much to them. There is a mutual respect, but that's all.

People rather communicate by internet, and keep a certain distance away. We live in a cold world, where people don't care much about anybody. When people decide they had enough of you, they can flush you and stop talking to you by internet.

It is amazing that I can live next door these people, and never really got to know them.

That's the way it is today. Neighbors are independent. You can talk to people around the world through internet and not know your neighbor.

Some people rather talk by internet like here on this forum, so in a way, we chat alot, but don't know eachother, and will never know each other. Internet has it's limits, and some people prefer it this way.

But there are still some good neighbors who are friendly, but it's rare, because people are independent and want to be alone.

greven

It is amazing that I can live next door these people, and never really got to know them.

So true! I live in a street with about 75 people in it and I only know 6 people from it!

Sad really!

Greven

undercover

People don't stay put these days either. Everyone is always moving up. You get married, you get a starter home. Then comes a baby. So you need a bigger house. Then that promotion comes thru. You can afford the nicer neighborhood with the better schools. More kids. Bigger house. Then kids go to college. Time to downsize. Few years later, time to retire and get a condo. With all that moving around it's hard to get very close to all those neighbors. Not that we shouldn't try. I'm guilty of not getting to know my neighbors. But I was raised to not have anything to do with neighbors(bad influence and all). I am friendly to my neighbors but I couldn't tell you their names. And that is sad, I guess.

Loris

This is so sad. to think that our neighbor could be ill or even die and we not know.

I am a hermit. I rarely speak to my neighbors also.

Undercover said:

But I was raised to not have anything to do with neighbors (bad influence and all).

That made me think about what Brummie posted recently:

I was wondering what consequences you personally suffer for having been a JW? Depersonalization, depression, keeping people at a distance, none...etc?

JW's are the first to claim love of neighbor but in actual practice do not show it. We were all trained to distance ourselves from our "worldy" neighbors. In our recovery from the indoctrination perhaps this has been overlooked.

I am going to bake some cookies and go meet my neighbors. Thank you Vivamus for bringing this to my attention.

Loris

cruzanheart

Okay, that's it -- I feel a block party coming on. My neighbor across the street, who is a dear person, is moving in a month or two to Kansas City, so I think I have an excuse. I've been trying to get to know my neighbors, not only because I sell Southern Living at Home stuff but because I want my children to have the feel of a real neighborhood. Murphy is a small town and our neighborhood kind of has that Leave It To Beaver feel about it, which I want to encourage. Besides, if the dogs ever get out I want as many people as possible to know who they belong to and return them! (Bassets tend to wander and lose their way home.)

Nina

minimus

The real reason I never associated with my neighbors was because they were all "bad association". Since being raised a JW, I've never really "bothered" with my street. Now, this mindset still somewhat exists. I am more conscious of not wanting to continue this thinking. But, I believe that I am conditioned to feel this way because of my background. Normally, I can be a very social person. And I have mostly all "worldly" friends. So, don't blame yourself entirely for not talking to "next-door". We can all learn from experiences such as yours, Viv.

Vivamus

JH, perhaps that is true, some people would rather be left alone, but I also think that's its become a habit. Greven, 6? At least that's more than me.... Undercover, that's true in many cases, but I've lived next to these people for over twenty years now. Loris, that's a cool idea, let us know how it went? Nina, block-party sounds awesome, will you let us know? Minimus, yes, worldly people were bad association and while I was a JW, I indeed never bothered with the people in my street.

Next-door.

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