The JW Child

be wise

I just thought I’d write down a few things on how being brought up as a JW affected me as a child. This is for my own personal ‘healing’.

1, Made me very paranoid. [Satan controls the world and everything in it].

2, No trust.

3, Disrespectful of the system and society in general.

4, Very scared of being attacked by demons from a very young age. [be frightened in my bedroom before going to sleep, also had a lot of reoccurring demonic dreams, not nice].

5, No respect for professional help only what the WBTS said was good and not good for me.

6, Couldn’t socialise as much as I’d liked outside the Borg. Couldn’t make real friends.

7, Things just always seemed very unreal to me, my head never came down to the real ground. Was this just being young or was it because of all the bullshit I was being bombarded with constantly? I’ll never know.

8, Ridiculed a lot and bullied on occasions. [Not too much concern over this, made me a much stronger person, just wish it had have been for a worthy cause].

9, Family life; hush hush, no one ever spoke, we did what we were told [by the WBTS that is, although it never worked out in reality]. DFing, told not to associate [recommended] not to speak to my brother. Still young but this woke me up concerning the borg. Didn’t research any more about them until 5 years after I consciously left.

10, Found JWD and Freeminds – Stopped living in fear and freed my mind.

I am no longer scared of the real truth

Have a go; be honest.

Mystery

How Brought up as a JW Affected me as a Child:

1) No emotions or praise from my mom & dad. (You gave a good talk tonight or something like that, but no praise on a personal level)

2) No "i love yous". (Maybe it was just their personalities; or maybe they werew afraid of getting to close becasue shunning was always in the back of their mind just incase one of us strayed)

3) No real friends. (JW friends were very superficial, they were their when THEY needed something; but not for me when I needed something.)

4) Never fitting in. (With either side - JW's or "worldly")

5) Having to hide my real feelings on certain subjects of "the truth"; because asking questions was taboo. (Shunning; everyone dying except us; if you were resurected not being able to marry)

6) Being told that since I was a girl I couldn't go to Bethel. (Thank God! now)

7) When having thoughts of suicide, my "friends I was suppose to trust" making fun of me. And my secret friend (worldly) helped me keep my sanity.

8) Being made fun of at school.

9) Trying so hard to PLEASE and always coming up short. (always feeling like a failure)

You wanted honesty be wise. Dredging it up, brought it all back. But this again this site has brought a lot back. The time for real healing is beginning.

Take Care,
Mystery

leddfootdja

The two of you hit on much of what I would have identified, but here are a couple others I could think of:

1. Thinking I knew everything and having a very closed mind to other ways of life and thought.

2. Only having parents who "cared" when they felt like having power over something-certainly not their own lives.

IE: Inactive and totally absent from raising my brother and I except when it came to abuse(stepmother) and disparaging comments

(father).

mattnoel

You hit the nail on the head there !!!!

Amazing how they mess up your life isnt it. You have to work twice as hard to adjust yourself to normality, its kinda like jet leg isnt it.

Maverick

Thank y-all for sharing the pain you went through. My daughter has told me of similar feelings she had when with the J-duds. After her mother left I had to deal with a suicidal 13 year-old. Took about three years to get her past thoughs feelings. I suffered depression, but I was an adult. I can not imagine going through all that crap as a kid. Thanks for the insight. Maverick