A Complete lack of Empathy with a huge side order of Foulness !

Thirteenth tribe

Over the last few years I have experienced in general a lack of sincerity and empathy from JW's .. I won't lie 2 sisters I knew to be different and quite genuine ... All be it still sipping the 'cool aid' though. But on the whole most brothers/sisters I've met couldn't really care less or just have no idea how to genuinely connect. One sister asked me a year ago how things were with my husband (an un-believer) I replied " a bit strange right now" (in hindsight it was always made worse because I was in a cult!!), before I could expand on that she cut in with "don't worry it's only temporary at least you will get a new husband in the new system"

I could of punched her smug, arrogant, smiling/sneering face! I didn't reply, I absorbed the crap and tried to forgive as it is hammered into us to gloss over our brothers and sisters transgressions! Man, now they gloss over the "transgressions" of hurting children in the worst way possible... I would like to watch a vigilante mob extract justice on these morons and then we can gloss over it!

Anyway rant over, I actually came on to post this very well defined short vid by Berne brown (sociology /psychology schola)r on sympathy and empathy- how one approach is detrimental and the other genuine. This is because most of the Jws I've seen in action have got it so wrong with their self righteous glazed over nonsense and could learn a thing or two from watching this video.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw

Peace out.

pandorasbox1914

Hi Thirteenth Tribe,

Great post, by the way don't sugar coat it, tell it how it is!

Je.suis.oisif

Oooh, I enjoyed that. Thank you.

Thirteenth tribe

I will never forget a debate I got into with a sister on forgiveness.. She stated how can you expect Jehovah to forgive your sins when you won't move past something that was done to you in your past and forgive that person ? I explained the very obvious difference and premise for my argument - I was sorry and remorseful for all my mistakes and actually seeked forgiveness. The person who wronged me is far from remorseful or sorry and is so arrogant they don't even know how to apologise... How can you be forgiven if you don't actually believe youve even been part of a hurtful action towards another human being? You need a transgressor, an acknowledgment of wrongdoing, a humble heart and then the other party can decide if they can or want to forgive!

The witnesses like to wave this magic generic 'rule of thumb' wand over every problem- when will they realise life is usually the grey area between black and white🤔FYI I was my own worst enemy the only person I hurt was myself ! 😕

Finkelstein

"don't worry it's only temporary at least you will get a new husband in the new system"

Taking that from the source shows the kind of indoctrinated stupidity which makes up a devout JWS. The WTS imposes a diversionary paradigm of us and them, them being the faithful sheep who will be chosen to live into a earthly paradise and goats who will be killed off come the great day of Armageddon.

You could have retorted a reply such as .... " Well I feel sorry for those who follow and support disobedient false prophets, they most likely will not be in the new order ! "

talesin

I've read some of her work, she's awesome, and great for anyone who is in therapy and healing. Great vid.

My favorite expression is "At least you don't have cancer." No matter what your health problem or quality of life is. Yep, that's a real comfort. NOT

Thirteenth tribe

Apologies on the previous rant on forgiveness .. I have waves of emotion and annoyance at being over influenced within my own head space! How long does it take to calm down after handing in your disassociation letter?

Thirteenth tribe

Thanks Finklestein, my husband has just read the entire thread and annoyed at some of the rubbish I've been listening to over the last few years! He feels you hit the nail on the head and I feel like I have closure on that comment now.

Talesin - in the last year an elders wife died from a brain tumour in my X congregation .. Every card and visitor came out with the same old rubbish (like a cd on play/repeat) - "at least you will see her soon in the new system, that might even happen before the funeral !"

I couldn't believe it, I wrote a card saying how sorry I was for all the pain they were going through as a family not "don't worry we will all be in paradise soon" it's just so damaging and completely invalidates someone's pain (it's also a pure insult to ones intelligence) just like the 'forgive if you want to be forgiven' rule.

He's actually stepped down from duties and declared boldly that the congregation have let him down... Best thing for him to do is leave with his 2 daughters.. so I wonder what will happen with him.

LongHairGal

ThirteenthTribe:

I am sorry for what you are going through. There were very few women there I could stand!!

As far as people feeling empathy: I think in general people have a problem putting themselves in somebody else's place. So, nobody is going to understand your problems. I remember feeling very alone when I was in the JW religion. People either thought that I had "no" problems because I was single, or they didn't care if I was alive.

I've been out for many years but I remember always having issues with the religion's sick attitudes about life and forgiveness. People can only be forgiven if they are truly sorry and actually STOP doing the offending thing.

As for anybody there who imagines they can keep on doing what they are doing, well...not around ME. Let them go inflict their behavior on a CO or GB's wife. Let's see how well THAT is received!

A Complete lack of Empathy with a huge side order of Foulness !

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