Video - "Use Insight When Comforting Others"
This was a WT contrived video of a sister who was widowed a year ago, and turns to members of the BoE after a meeting in the kingdom hall in a distraught emotional state accompanied by suicidal thoughts. Two members of the BoE saw her in her own home later that day.
She conveyed that she wanted her life back - that her heart had been ripped out. The elder acknowledges that "You and Dan had a wonderful relationship". The elder went on to describe how Joseph's father continued weeping for his son. He then added that Jehovah would ocntinue to support the sister, and one way this support is manifest is by means of the BoE! For the purpose of this video vignette, the elder was named Bro Shephard! The video showed two of the BoE seeking verses and a magazine preparatory to the home visit, to strengthen the distraught sister to be an integrity keeper.
When meeting at the sister's home, she disclosed that she had troubles with the house, and that she didn't want to go on any more. She stated that she was minded to turn on the car ignition in the garage and end it all. The elder briefly acknowledged her depression and related how Job was a target of Satan. The sister stated that Job was not as messed up as I am. The elder then read Job 6:2,3. He highlighted Job's "wild talk". Elder comparing this "wild talk" to the sister's disclosure of self harm via the car in the garage. The elder stated that an integrity keeper doesn't give in to "wild thoughts". He appealed to the sister to treat such a pattern as an immoral thought. He advised the sister to repeatedly recite that she is an integrity keeper.
The elder then moved on to sciptural verses for grief, and referred to Jeremiah 29:11,12. He stressed that the focus should be on future hopes and not calamity. He gave the sister an asignment to memorise and repeat the two verses out loud. The sister then rose up to get cookies to accompany the elders' coffee.
OPINION:
The CLAM brochure under the heading "Living as Christians" gave the following instructions... "...invite comments on how the two brothers were good examples of how to give encouragement when someone expresses anguish over the death of a loved one." The purpose of the video vignette therefore seems to be another in the example of the GBoJW endeavouring to augment the hegemony of BoE's with the implicit message of distressed individuals approaching the BoE solely. In the brochure, and in the video, there is no mention whatever of what point a distressed individual may need to arrive at in then obtaining professional help. No guidance for BoE about the application of modesty on their part and thus offering the sister practical help in approaching professional services, rather than seeking to manage the situation themselves. The visiting elders did not explore with the sister, her disclosure of wanting her life back and that her heart had been ripped out. No catharsis whatever! A significant omission.
The sister in the vignette, not only had suicidal thoughts, but also a plan to carry out the thought (indication of intent). That the BoE then respond in the realm of morality only serves to magnify any feelings of guilt held by the sister and could enhance risk rather than mitigate it. The sister briefly mentioned problems with her house - this was not responded to at all. Another omission. The elders entering into the realms of morality is an act of judgementalism and cruelty. This sister is living on her own, lost her husband a year previously and is in a situation where her mental state is deteriorating due to issues not being assuaged or otherwise being in receipt of help. The approach of the two elders was a missed opportunity. That the video does not contextualise the risk (distress, loss, isolation) to show that the risk of self harm is significant, is an indication of incompetence to put it mildly.
Were the sister to have been encouraged and supported to obtain professional help, she would have been offered a thorough assessment, crisis support, counselling, treatment, social support with the house difficulties alluded to, and bereavement counselling. She would have been in receipt of frequent and supportive visits by knowledgeable and trained persons. A plan would have been agreed to assuage her isolation. She may even have been offered several days supportive respite care by an organisation specialising in helping individuals in a state of suicidal crisis.
That the GBoJW has hitherto shown this video at the elders "school" as a template for adequate response is deeply worrying to all professionals who are mental health / psychiatric professionals. It mirrors the unspoken disdain which the GBoJW seems to have for public health and welfare services in that a victim of child abuse is never advised to seek help from child welfare departments. This vignette of a suicidal sister similarly seems to reinforce the idea that such crises be managed "in house" so to speak.
The vignette also assumes competence on the part of the BoE to deal with such a complex, traumatic, and risky situation. It assumes that the behavioural profile of the BoE is one in which individuals would have the confidence and trust to approach them in a distraught state. This is far far removed from my experience. It would be the course of wisdom for elders to acknowledge their limitiations and support individuals in gaining professional help rather than abandoning modesty and seeking to resolve issues themselves. After all, elders are not trained mental health / psychiatric professionals as a WT put it some years ago!
Lastly, when comments from the audience were invited at my congregation, I noted the paucity of hands and the brevity of those who did answer. Perhaps a statement of sorts was being made!
This was a WT contrived video of a sister who was widowed a year ago, and turns to members of the BoE after a meeting in the kingdom hall in a distraught emotional state accompanied by suicidal thoughts. Two members of the BoE saw her in her own home later that day.
She conveyed that she wanted her life back - that her heart had been ripped out. The elder acknowledges that "You and Dan had a wonderful relationship". The elder went on to describe how Joseph's father continued weeping for his son. He then added that Jehovah would ocntinue to support the sister, and one way this support is manifest is by means of the BoE! For the purpose of this video vignette, the elder was named Bro Shephard! The video showed two of the BoE seeking verses and a magazine preparatory to the home visit, to strengthen the distraught sister to be an integrity keeper.
When meeting at the sister's home, she disclosed that she had troubles with the house, and that she didn't want to go on any more. She stated that she was minded to turn on the car ignition in the garage and end it all. The elder briefly acknowledged her depression and related how Job was a target of Satan. The sister stated that Job was not as messed up as I am. The elder then read Job 6:2,3. He highlighted Job's "wild talk". Elder comparing this "wild talk" to the sister's disclosure of self harm via the car in the garage. The elder stated that an integrity keeper doesn't give in to "wild thoughts". He appealed to the sister to treat such a pattern as an immoral thought. He advised the sister to repeatedly recite that she is an integrity keeper.
The elder then moved on to sciptural verses for grief, and referred to Jeremiah 29:11,12. He stressed that the focus should be on future hopes and not calamity. He gave the sister an asignment to memorise and repeat the two verses out loud. The sister then rose up to get cookies to accompany the elders' coffee.
OPINION:
The CLAM brochure under the heading "Living as Christians" gave the following instructions... "...invite comments on how the two brothers were good examples of how to give encouragement when someone expresses anguish over the death of a loved one." The purpose of the video vignette therefore seems to be another in the example of the GBoJW endeavouring to augment the hegemony of BoE's with the implicit message of distressed individuals approaching the BoE solely. In the brochure, and in the video, there is no mention whatever of what point a distressed individual may need to arrive at in then obtaining professional help. No guidance for BoE about the application of modesty on their part and thus offering the sister practical help in approaching professional services, rather than seeking to manage the situation themselves. The visiting elders did not explore with the sister, her disclosure of wanting her life back and that her heart had been ripped out. No catharsis whatever! A significant omission.
The sister in the vignette, not only had suicidal thoughts, but also a plan to carry out the thought (indication of intent). That the BoE then respond in the realm of morality only serves to magnify any feelings of guilt held by the sister and could enhance risk rather than mitigate it. The sister briefly mentioned problems with her house - this was not responded to at all. Another omission. The elders entering into the realms of morality is an act of judgementalism and cruelty. This sister is living on her own, lost her husband a year previously and is in a situation where her mental state is deteriorating due to issues not being assuaged or otherwise being in receipt of help. The approach of the two elders was a missed opportunity. That the video does not contextualise the risk (distress, loss, isolation) to show that the risk of self harm is significant, is an indication of incompetence to put it mildly.
Were the sister to have been encouraged and supported to obtain professional help, she would have been offered a thorough assessment, crisis support, counselling, treatment, social support with the house difficulties alluded to, and bereavement counselling. She would have been in receipt of frequent and supportive visits by knowledgeable and trained persons. A plan would have been agreed to assuage her isolation. She may even have been offered several days supportive respite care by an organisation specialising in helping individuals in a state of suicidal crisis.
That the GBoJW has hitherto shown this video at the elders "school" as a template for adequate response is deeply worrying to all professionals who are mental health / psychiatric professionals. It mirrors the unspoken disdain which the GBoJW seems to have for public health and welfare services in that a victim of child abuse is never advised to seek help from child welfare departments. This vignette of a suicidal sister similarly seems to reinforce the idea that such crises be managed "in house" so to speak.
The vignette also assumes competence on the part of the BoE to deal with such a complex, traumatic, and risky situation. It assumes that the behavioural profile of the BoE is one in which individuals would have the confidence and trust to approach them in a distraught state. This is far far removed from my experience. It would be the course of wisdom for elders to acknowledge their limitiations and support individuals in gaining professional help rather than abandoning modesty and seeking to resolve issues themselves. After all, elders are not trained mental health / psychiatric professionals as a WT put it some years ago!
Lastly, when comments from the audience were invited at my congregation, I noted the paucity of hands and the brevity of those who did answer. Perhaps a statement of sorts was being made!