Plumbing the Depth of Watchtower Fanaticism

by metatron 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • metatron
    metatron

    There are experiences that are difficult to put into words. Sometimes a circumstance is so out of the ordinary, it becomes

    difficult to articulate to others, to give them an accurate mental image and set of feelings corresponding with a dramatic past

    reality.

    Such is the experience a few of us had in surviving Bethel, between the '60's and '80's. I just cannot express to you accurately

    what a totalitarian institution that place was - and the depth of cold, unreasoning fanaticism that dominated it.

    The situation was that, the Society demanded that brothers come to Bethel for 4 years, signing a promise to do so. Since the

    Vietnam war and the draft was raging, the Society had the power, in effect, to impel brothers into prison because they could

    inform any draft board that 'such and such' a brother was NOT a "minister" any longer. This fact, together with the repellantly

    negative personality of N.H. Knorr, created a subclass of Bethelites who were embittered and cynical about the 'sweatshop'

    conditions in the factory, as well as being driven like slaves by taskmasters who held their draft deferment in jeopardy.

    I cannot tell you the depth of anger and disaffiliation I witnessed towards the Society. Theft within Bethel increased,

    along with hidden alcoholism and endless tirades about sexual matters morning after morning by Brother Knorr.

    The average stay dropped from 4 years down to a little over a year as brothers couldn't take it anymore. Morale was

    abysmal as Knorr fulminated about the reputation of Bethelites generally, being wild, sex-crazed and greedy.

    He even organized a sudden mass meeting to denounce Bethelites who wore jeans and had "bad-attitudes".

    Some brothers simply 'disappeared' - they didn't come back from lunch and apparently left Bethel forever.

    It was obvious to many older brothers that a number of Bethelites probably didn't believe in anything,

    but just got stuck there, unable to leave for various reasons. Some were party boys and gigolos - and a few were gay.

    None of this mattered to Nathan H. Knorr. Not One Bit......

    He lambasted, he vilified, he ranted. He Was Right, Everyone Else Was Wrong. Letters sent by concerned brothers

    about the harshness and lack of spirituality in Bethel enraged him. He demanded ( in a private letter to the servants)

    that the King's County congregation ( in the 107 building, 90% Bethelites) would be a "model congregation" - even though

    the emotional context of the hall was simply - dead. I cannot express to you how unbending this sick old man was

    in the face of obvious and growing problems. No one's opinion mattered - except his own Stalin- like will.

    In the end, Bethel changed for the better - because it had to do so. They gave up calling in pioneers of long standing

    and started calling in brothers who had been baptised for 6 months, together with all that inferred ( this was the era of

    LSD and free love, remember?). They were forced to ease up because they needed workers - and increasingly trained

    and capable workers, at that. The emergence of a Governing Body, with more moderate men like Ray Franz, drained

    some of Knorr's dictatorial authority - and the Bethel application began to ask probative questions about past drug use.

    The lesson here?

    Sue them

    Hit them

    Make as much trouble as you can for them, everyway you can because nothing else will bring about change.

    Take note of how quickly they respond to a legal threat --- while a letter from Sister Poor n' Oppressed gets a

    formulaic reply and gets circular-filed.

    The brothers who became cynical were fully justified in thinking things so

    because the Theocrats view the friends as sheep who can be sacrificed in a pinch, whenever the Holy Watchtower gets into trouble.

    Don't doubt for a minute that these men eagerly disparage the molested victims of their concealment - out of public earshot.

    Don't doubt for a minute that these old men wonder what the fuss is all about when they can just get more converts

    to replace those lost to their own lies and errors. Think any of them grieve over a few hundred Blacks lost in Malawi?

    or few kids with leukemia? or tens of thousands who lost their families in shunning? How can I assert that they now feel

    a tender emotion I never witnessed in the halls of Theocratic power? Have any of you ever read a quote from Crisis of Conscience

    from Jarasz himself - that resembles Caiaphas proclaiming his rulership on the backs of sacrificed individuals?

    Never expect them to change -- because of pity, mercy, compassion or honesty.

    Knorr is dead, but don't make the mistake of thinking that his spirit is gone, too.

    metatron ( and remember that Rutherford was even WORSE!)

  • sf
    sf

    {{{{{{{ Met }}}}}}}

    sKally

  • joelbear
    joelbear

    I worked with Sister Knorr at the Farm and she was a really nice lady. I guess she had to be to live with NH. Whenever I would complain about anything, people at the Farm would say, this is nothing, you should have been here under Knorr.

    Serving at Bethel definitely changed my viewpoint of what the organization was. I was very idealistic in my view of the society. I was surprised to see how manmade the society felt at Bethel. It just didn't feel spiritual or uplifting. I can't really put it into words. There were lots of rule and regulations about everything. But it was not so much the rules, but how they were enforced. Very legalistic.

    I remember when I was brought in and about to be dismissed, at one point they brought out my Bethel application and showed me my signature where I had signed that I was morally pure or something to that affect. It made my heart sink to realize what a bureaucracy was in place.

    If Bethel is a model for the new system, all I can say is, be afraid, be very afraid.

  • happyout
    happyout

    Metatron,

    It seems obvious that you are in pain. I hope those memories ease up, and fade out. Just think how great it is to be out!!

    Big hugs

    Happyout

  • metatron
    metatron

    I used to have dreams about bars over windows for years after I left.

    How much imagination does it take to sit in a Kingdom Hall during some mind-numbing drivel

    and say to yourself:

    "It doesn't have to be this way, it could all be different" ??

    What would be so wrong with a religion adopting Nordstrom's motto as its guide,

    "In all circumstances, use your best judgement" ?

    metatron

  • Room 215
    Room 215

    Meta, my heart goes out to you as you struggle to exorcize those demons. With all due respect, and by no means intending to minimize the pain of those years for you, feel moved to say that for me personally, my four-year stint at Bethel was not as traumatic nor as unremittingly negative and experience as yours. While it's true that some of the worst people I've ever met were there, there were some really fine ones, and I must admit that I met and bonded with many of my peers and in many cases forged lifetime friendships with former ``cellmates" .... many if not most of whom are happily on the outside looking in.

    Maybe I was Mr. Magoo-myopic... anyway, don't despair; you've moved on quite admiarably.

  • Special K
    Special K

    Metatron

    thanks for sharing what it was like on the inside of the inside of this organization.

    Sounds like a type of boot camp

    I dated a bethelite for a few years.. I'm so glad now that it never worked out between us, .. He wanted me to move to Bethel.. and I couldn't see a life there. GUESS I WAS RIGHT!!

    I agree with you. If that was how it was going to be in their new system of things.. I like you, certainly wouldn't want to live in it. Unloving, unkind, unjust...authoritarian leadership.

    I'm sorry you had to go through that terrible ordeal with them

    Grieve the loss of your time there and slowly move forward.. and get as far away from them as you can. They don't deserve your thoughts anymore. When you've had enough.. let them go..and move on into your life seeking happiness and joy that you finally know who and what they are.

    Special K

  • ARoarer
    ARoarer

    meteton,

    When my son was in Bethel in the sweatshop he was so miserable. I remember finding a poem he wrote about it, entitled "Pain within the Walls". He did not even make a year. I was so happy he got out. Like a Viet Nam War Veteran, he will not, can not speak about it. Too ugly and painful for him.

    Aroarer

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