Odds are in my favor but I been so heart broken I don't even want to be optimistic about it.
So a few weeks ago my sister has opened up our relationship. She hasn't had much contact with me for 5 years because of my disfellowshipment. I did post in the past on this site a few points that showed we had bad breaking because of my disfellowshipment. We were very close growing up so this was devastating. As an older sister I wanted to protect her and I also blamed alot of what happened on myself. So the space was good for her to grow and she has, well we both have. She's at the early stage of the mental toll that Jehovah's Witness mentality brings (she's doing the flighty phase I went through... which as an older sister I warned her about), the stage where she will have to decide will this brake her or make her stronger. She is mentally still in, meaning she believes in Jehovah and the organization. She made it clear that she believes in Jehovah and she wishes that we don't discuss religion... (Than she ended up bring it up when she visited second time, me keeping my part but her open, my husband told me to stand up for myself by cutting her off and reminding her of our bondaries... part of me says yes but the other part of me says this is how she can connect and I gain her trust... if I can just hold back from commenting). She is finding that the reasoning isn't matching up with her desire so she's struggling in what she calls "finding herself". Her husband wasn't supportive (got the elders to side with him). They are split so now it's our mom that's helping her emotionally through this.
While my mom still seems to be a mystery to me, because she gives the gifts on the holidays and is supportive she doesn't want to celebrate herself and still believes in Jehovah (this may be a front because she still wants to keep the trust between my sister and me), she has fully left and dates men outside the organization. She hasn't gone to the halls for 5 years. She has been to the memorials with my sister but I doubt she will if my sister doesn't go. I'm very happy to gain a sister but very emotionally anxious... The books are working that I have been reading. Emotionally Intelligence by Daniel Goleman is one I'm on now. It's making sense why I have less coping skills then my husband or any other person that face struggle.
I do have my guard up (weither that be the truama and all the mental work it took to "let go") but then again I can't be afraid to reach out (she is my sister). This is me going to have to reach out of my comfort zone (self help books in practise) and make sure to keep close to those who have established trust and reliable, shown unconditional love.
If you have any wise words, prayers, experiences, anything... much appreciation.
Thank you for reading.
And just wanted to say how honored and proud I am of my sister. She is in nonprofit organizations to help those that's been sexually abused. She wants to go back to school to become therapist and help women with confidence. Right now a strong lady, business manager, and independent.